To begin with I would like to say that I don't own Bullfrog, DKI or DKII or any of the characters within. I just torture and mutilate them till they do my bidding.

Mwahahaha (Evil Cackle and falls off seat)

Basically when I am in the dungeon I raise an army of warlocks for spell working, and because they whoop ass, I have never lost a game. When I get the torture chamber I have so much fun converting heroes spell casters I forget to get gold sometimes. And then I annihilate the enemy keeper(s) with bolts of lightning and splatty red things (wma… smaller maniacal laugh. The last one hurt.)

Here goes. You will now see what happens when a rebellion occurs, with an unexpected alliance. My first DK fanfic. Let's see how explosive it is.

Yours Devilishly


The lair's dank walls oozed in response to the warlocks fury.

"Pay Cut!!!! How dare He!!"

Earlier that night, as it is always night in the dungeon, the heart sent a telepathic message to every minion in the dungeon, explaining that due to the Keeper Repossession and Pain council, money was being extradited from the treasury to pay for a very expensive gambling habit, from one of the goblins. This didn't go down to well with anyone, but the warlocks being especially proud took the news exceptionally badly.

An imp, laden with gems bound for the council, scuttled by, sniggering.

"BLESS YOU CREATURE LIGHT!!!!" The mage bellowed at the dumbstruck minion, blank eyes staring past the caster.

Annoyed by his continued presence the warlock muttered a spell under his breath, forming spheres of fire at his fingers. As the flames began circling him he shot his hand out and pointed to the imp and the barrage began. It ended quicker than it started as a gaggle of purple robed men stood in the way.

"Medinius!" the 8 foot tall mage in the centre of the party hissed.

"We are all frustrated, but, there is no need to take it out on the hired help now is there?" The Head librarian had an amused look upon his face as those around him tittered in agreement.

Medinius's rage was barely contained now.

"What do you suppose we do Kalio? Leave, become good and Help people like those pitiful Heroes topside?" Emphasis was placed on "Help" and "Heroes" to the point of them forming in front of him in a venomous green colour.

"Well maybe not quite go that far. But leave? Definitely." Kalio smiled that wry smile of his and nodded. "We leave at Shadowbreak"

During the hours that followed chaos ensued. The warlocks first devised a spell to trap chickens around the ethereal space around them, kinda like an invisible backpack with enough storage for 20 chickens each.

Then they packed away as many books as they could and polished their staves.

On the way to the portal all 16 evil mages stopped by the workshop for a little visit.

The workbenches were strewn on the floor after the gusts of wind struck them and threw them to the wall. The trolls stood defensively in front of their creations, hoping to protect them from the onslaught. Blood spattered against a new boulder trap.

"Foolish trolls, interrupting our precious spell work all night long" one of the weaker warlocks cackled, crisping the little green man to a blackened lump of char.

"Okay men!" Kalio roared over the rabble of purple clad murderers. "Let's leave."

The Portals mists swirled around them in an eerie manner, engulfing them, swallowing them like a beast of the deep.