How To: Procrastinate


"How did you forget about this?" Sasuke asked Naruto from the bed. Naruto was hurriedly pulling on his pants and brushing his teeth at the same time. He had forgotten that he had a meeting with the town council this morning.

"I didn't forget," Naruto said, muffled by the shirt he was struggling into, "I just momentarily misplaced the thought."

"That's what forgetting is, Naruto."

"Shut up bastard."

"Well have fun, I have the day off so I'll probably still be asleep when you get home," Sasuke smirked from the middle of the bed, "Try not to wake me up when you come in."

"I said shut up—hey, don't you have to meet with your team this morning?" Naruto asked Sasuke.

Sasuke glanced at the clock and, realizing he was supposed to meeting his team, cursed before he hurled himself out of the bed and into the bathroom. Naruto laughed.

"Did you forget something, bastard?"

Sasuke poked his head around the bathroom door, toothbrush hanging out of his mouth and said, "No I just momentarily misplaced the thought."

"But Sasuke, that's what forgetting is," Naruto said innocently.

Naruto dodged the wet towel that Sasuke chucked at him, laughing hysterically.


"Naruto," Konohamaru sing-songed, "You wouldn't happen to have your mission reports, now would you?"

Naruto looked at the chuunin who was currently working in the mission reports office. He scratched at the back of his neck and he considered the other man.

"From the last mission?" Naruto asked. Konohamaru nodded. "Um, well, Sasuke said he was bringing it in yesterday. You should ask him."

"Hm," Konohamaru said, squinting at Naruto, "I will."

"See you later," Naruto said, hurriedly exiting the office.

Later that day, Konohamaru ran into Sasuke while heading to Ichiraku for lunch.

"Hey, do you have to mission report?" Konohamaru was satisfied by the sight widening of the Uchiha's eyes.

Sasuke's nonchalant mask only broke for a moment before falling seamlessly back into place. This time, there was an edge of disdain to the look he gave the chuunin.

"Naruto has it," Sasuke answered in monotone.

"Funny, he said the same thing about you this morning," Konohamaru said suspiciously.

"He's an idiot. He probably forgot," Sasuke sneered, "I'm leaving now."

Konohamaru yelled after him, "You or your boyfriend better have that report on my desk by tomorrow!"

Sasuke gave no indication that he had even heard the younger man.


Back his and Naruto's shared apartment, Sasuke fell onto the couch next to the other man.

"I saw Konohamaru on the way back," Sasuke said, shoving the bag containing the ramen into Naruto's hands.

Naruto gave a little moan as he inhaled the scent emanating from the bag, "What'd he have to say?"

"He asked about the late report," Sasuke said, putting an arm around Naruto who had already started shoveling the ramen into his mouth.

"Oh? And what did you tell him?"

"Nothing," Sasuke answered honestly, "But I did say that you had it."

"Why? I just got him off my back this morning," Naruto whined around a mouthful of noodles, "You handle him for once."

"If you the reports on time in the first place, neither of us would have to deal with him," Sasuke reminded him.

"You could do reports. Why is it my responsibility?" Naruto asked.

"Why are you complaining? You don't do them now." Sasuke deflected.

"But why should I do them at all?" Naruto said. "I'm not doing them anymore. I officially bestow the honor upon you Uchiha."

"God damn it." Sasuke groaned, before grabbing the blank report from the table in front of them

Naruto grinned, "Have fun, lover."


"Have you thought about what you're getting Kakasi yet?" Sakura asked her former teammates.

Naruto pulled away from Sasuke's lips to answer his. Sasuke definitely did not pout and contented himself with turning Naruto's neck into a chew toy.

"His birthday isn't for two weeks Sakura-chan," Naruto stated,

"But he's so hard to shop for, Naruto. You should start thinking about it now," Sakura said, "Oh, damn, I need to go."

"See you tomorrow Sakura," Naruto said. She waved and exited the restaurant. Naruto turned back to Sasuke, "Where were we?"


"Hello?" Naruto answered the phone breathlessly.

"Hey Naruto. I just want to see what you got Kakashi for his birthday. To make sure we didn't get the same thing. I ordered him a new weapon set," Iruka said. He was answered by a moan. "Uh, Naruto?"

"We haven't gotten him anything yet, but no new weapons, got it." Naruto said. There was a giggle and then another moan from the background.

"Are you busy? I can call back," Iruka laughed nervously.

"Naruto's a bit tied up. He'll have to call you back," Sasuke said in a rough voice.

Iruka stared at the phone, blushing furiously.


"Shit Sasuke, stop. What day is it?" Naruto said, pushing his lover off of him.

"Friday," Sasuke mumbled against Naruto's hip.

Naruto jumped out of bed.

"Shit, shit, Sasuke it's Friday," Naruto exclaimed.

"I know I just—" Sasuke broke off, his eyes widening. He jumped up to get dressed too.

"How the hell did we forget Kakashi's birthday?" Naruto asked.

"Did you at least figure out what we're getting him?" Sasuke asked, handing Naruto his toothbrush, his own in hand.

"I'm open to suggestions," Naruto said.

They looked at each other before say simultaneously, "Fuck it, let's just get him porn."


"Hurry up Sasuke," Naruto whined, struggling against the leather straps binding him to the bed.

"Hush, Naru-chan," Sasuke said. He trailed his fingers and tongue over various parts of Naruto's body, pointed ignoring his empty ass and rigid cock.

Sasuke took in Naruto's flushed face and chest, "You look so pretty like this. All red and panting. Want it that bad, huh?"

Sasuke licked a trail up Naruto's neck while his fingers danced over Naruto's puffy, rosy nipples. Naruto whimpered, his arms straining against the bindings.

"Please Sasuke, touch my cock," Naruto pleaded.

"Not yet, I'm not done playing yet and I don't want to you come before I'm done playing," Sasuke answered.

Sasuke moved to bite at Naruto's nipples. His fingers played around the rim of Naruto's tightly furled hole. He put a small amount of pressure without pushing inside and chuckled when Naruto's hips bucked up violently.

"Don't worry Naruto, I fully intend to fuck your tight little ass," Sasuke reassured the man underneath him. He ground his cock against Naruto's hip pointedly.

"Then get to it already," Naruto glared at his boyfriend.

"Not yet," Sasuke said absently while reaching for the lube.

Naruto groaned in frustration. Sasuke smirked down at him as he carefully lubed a few fingers.

"Soon, Naru-chan," Sasuke soothed as he slipped fingers inside Naruto's heat with no warning.

Naruto screamed.


A/N: What? Two fics in less than 24 hours? And one is an update? Feel free to yell at me for this extremely late update. Hope you enjoyed!