Deontology and Utilitarianism
Ninnik Nishukan


Summary: Villain and Hero Ethics 101. Drakken and Shego have finally managed to take over the world. Set in some sort of random, post-season 3 future, an alternate season 4 or something— take your pick. The robots mentioned in the story are not the Little Diablo robots, just so you know.
He'd done it this time. He'd actually done it.

It wasn't almost this time. There was nothing almost about it at all.

He hadn't almost reached his goal, only to be thwarted by Team Possible— no, he was, in fact, the ruler of the world.

His robots were stationed all across the globe, he'd conquered the world...and Kim Possible, the buffoon and even the little pink rat thing had all died in an explosion. And they hadn't even been in his lair when it had happened. Nobody could blame him. There was no evidence.

Ironic— here he and Shego had tried getting rid of Team Possible for years, and when it finally happened, it was because they'd somehow managed to get themselves killed. It kind of figured, really.

Completely accidental, not his fault at all— he hadn't even had to bloody his hands by having to kill the only people he knew that were capable of stopping his ingenious plans. He had scarcely been able to believe his own luck— the world usually never gave him any breaks at all— and had been careful to wait until it was confirmed that they were indeed gone before he'd breathed a sigh of relief.

He knew he should've celebrated, but while he could certainly celebrate his own world conquest and the fact that they wouldn't be bothering him and Shego ever again, he couldn't bring himself to celebrate the simple fact that they were dead. They'd been worthy foes, especially Kim Possible herself, who'd even saved his life once or twice without really having to, and so he and Shego had a brief moment of silence for their passing before they returned to business as usual.

The rest of the Possible family and that little computer wiz kid had all fled, but he had his robots searching for them even now. They would be caught eventually. Nobody would stop him this time. Nobody.

He was the ruler of the world. Had been for the better part of a week now, and the reality of it all was slowly beginning to sink in.

Right at that moment, he had his ol' pals Ramesh and Chen in chains, building a huge statue in his honour.

He grinned. That was a good feeling. He bet that they'd never pictured themselves ever ending up doing that back in the eighties. Funny how life worked itself out.

And eventually, he'd also have Dr. James T. Possible doing his bidding.

And then there was Shego. She was, if possible, feeling even more incredulous than him. He could tell.

He'd never quite been able to figure out if she'd actually wanted him to succeed or not. She always complained about them never succeeding, yet she seemed to love ripping him apart when they failed,acting like everything was always his fault.

Now, even if she laughed alongside him when they realized the extent of the power they now held, Drakken had his doubts of Shego's happiness with their newfound situation. She seemed a bit...unsure, though she didn't look like she was even aware of it herself. He often wondered what went on in her head; it wasn't as if she expressed her feelings very often, or at least not the more private ones.

Drakken could only hope that she liked everything he'd managed to achieve and that she would stay. He didn't quite know what he'd do without her; he'd partly done this for her as well, if only to show her what he was capable of.

And life wouldn't be as interesting without her...and it would, admittedly, be lonelier. No matter how many subordinates he'd get.


That morning, Shego stood looking out across the city from the top window of the ludicrously tall building they'd moved into as she drank her first cup of coffee of the day.

It was the tallest building in the city. Once upon a time, she might have made some sort of crack about him compensating for something, but now...somehow, he didn't seem like he had anything to compensate for anymore.

He had actually achieved global domination. He actually had.

They had. Because she'd actually managed to keep Kim Possible away this time— well, before she'd died, anyway— just long enough to give the Doc time to get his scheme up and running. Shego still couldn't quite believe the teen was dead; someone that stubborn in their fight against evil was bound to turn up as a zombie or something one day.

They'd be ruling the world together now, it seemed. Because he had so much power now that, with basically a snap of his fingers, he'd given her Iceland, like he'd promised once upon a time. And he'd thrown in Greenland, too, just for the heck of it, flippantly saying that the name suited her.

With a disbelieving giggle in her throat, she'd demanded Australia too, more as a joke than anything else—

—but with a shrug, he'd given her Australia, too.

And she'd stood there looking at the paperwork that effectively made her ruler of these three countries, and had felt her fingers tingle with the rush of power.

After Kim Possible's death, Shego had been just a little worried. Now that they didn't need to steal anything anymore— because really, who could refuse the ruler of the world anything?— and she didn't have to fight Kim Possible anymore, what was she supposed to do for him? What was her role now?

She'd quickly discovered, however, with some sense of relief, that he in fact needed her now more than ever. There was a lot to do when you were the ruler of the world. And there was a lot of work you had to delegate.

Now was the time when he truly required his right hand woman. They'd gain more followers eventually, because there were always enough power hungry people out there— Drakken had already hired Hank Perkins as his secretary and accountant and had made Duff Killigan the head of his Scotland branch— but for now, Shego was the one that Drakken relied on the most for loyalty, common sense, support and for helping him keep an eye on things.

She found herself, when before she'd sometimes been annoyed, feeling a wave of affection for him whenever he looked so proud, brimming with pleased self-confidence, his grin wide as he surveyed the world, his world. He'd worked very, very hard, and in her opinion, he deserved this, if only for the sake of sheer determination alone. He wouldn't have succeeded if he hadn't been intelligent and skilled, too, of course, but she'd never seen anyone this persistent before; it was a quality she felt she often lacked, and that she secretly admired.

The thing that made her feel the warmest, though, the thing that made her feel the kind of reassurance she hadn't thought she'd needed, was the way he always looked back to her when he achieved something, as if needing her approval, as if needing to share every moment of giddy, evil happiness with her. It made her realize he would always keep her around, and that she wouldn't be out of his life unless she decided to leave him herself.

But that wasn't something she could see herself doing, and especially not now. He'd be lonely here at the top without her, she knew, and she found satisfaction in that fact. The ruler of the world needed her. That had a nice ring to it. Besides, it was fun at the top. She could see herself spending many entertaining years there.

Of course, admitting to herself that she might be the one who'd be lonely if she left him wasn't a point she'd quite reached yet. The thought was there, though, lurking in the back of her head.

He'd given her Iceland, Greenland and Australia that Tuesday. It was now Friday, and she had a feeling that before the weekend was over, she'd be the ruler of at least one more country.

Things were looking rather good.

But this was, of course, when they called. Before her and Dr. D had barely even finished their morning coffee, they called.


Disbelief. That was the main thing he felt when he saw what was in front of him.

It was nine am, his coffee cup stood half-finished next to him, he hadn't been awake for more than maybe half an hour, and he truly hadn't expected this to be the start of his day.

Despite the early morning, he'd felt on top of the world in more than one meaning of the expression, but now he was having the same sensation he'd had when somebody had slowly pulled his wallet out of his pocket on an overcrowded subway train without him being able to stop them because he couldn't move; it'd happened to him once, many, many years ago when he'd been young, somewhat naive and on a trip to Chicago.

And he was, in fact, not moving. He was only staring at the screen as if frozen. He could hear Shego's footsteps coming up behind him, but it was as if the source of the sound was much further away than it really was. Dull, muffled.

"Drewbie!"Came the all too familiar voice from the other side of the line. "Tell these— these goons to unhand me right now!"

Finally, he snapped out of his dazed shock enough to turn his head to look at Shego. "My mother!"He exclaimed in a whispering hiss, "I forgot about her!"

Panic shot through him, and with a sinking sensation, he felt suddenly very, very foolish. He'd only considered his newly acquired position as the supreme ruler of the world these last few days, and hadn't remembered about his mother at all. And now he was learning the hard way just how easy a target she'd been, how much of a weakness leaving her at home with no protection had given him, how suddenly he was finding himself at somebody's else's mercy instead of being the one who others would have to beg for mercy from—

Shego only gave a nod towards the screen and swivelled his chair around again so he was facing their callers once more. You couldn't show your opponent this much emotion, you couldn't fall apart like this and be this obvious about the fact that you'd been shocked and disturbed and were at a disadvantage— but Dr. D had never been good at being very emotionally discreet or subtle.

"Good morning, Dr. Drakken," Dr. Betty Director said— and he knew it was her, because what villain didn't know her face by now? — and there was a rush of disgust and anger in Drakken's gut as he noticed the flicker of amusement in her eyes. She knew that she'd caught him completely by surprise, and she also knew that he knew that she knew. And Drakken could tell that had she been a less of a self-disciplined person, she might've been grinning with righteous self-satisfaction right then.

"What do you want?"Drakken asked in a slight croak, though he already had a pretty good idea of what Global Justice wanted.

"Simple, Dr. Drakken," Dr. Director said evenly, "If you give up the world domination you've finally achieved, we won't...terminate your mother."

"WHAT?!"His mother's voice was loud and shrill with shock, yet there was a quivering, angry undercurrent of offense there, as if somebody had just insulted her cooking instead of given her a death threat.

Drakken spluttered with barely suppressed rage, his face feeling uncomfortably hot all of a sudden. He'd known, of course he'd known what Dr. Director might say, but actually hearing the words—

"Let go of me, you big bully!" Mama Lipsky demanded, elbowing one of the two guards who were holding her sharply in the stomach. He grunted in pain, his mouth falling open with a silent yell, but quickly grabbed a hold of the elderly woman's arm again.

Drakken leaned forward, eyes flashing with fury and desperation. "B-but you're the good guys! You're not supposed to be doing this! You can't do this!"

Dr. Director raised an eyebrow, her voice calm as she spoke. "It rather looks like we are."

Shego stepped up behind Drakken, putting a bracing hand on his shoulder. "You're bluffing. You won't do it."

"Oh, we won't? What would the life of one old woman, the mother of a villain yet, be in comparison to our freedom?"Dr. Director answered bluntly; behind her, they could hear Mama Lipsky let out a gasp. "Getting the world back? We're not Kim Possible, Shego. We're not heroes— we are the ones who have to take responsibility and consider the bigger picture, even if that means getting our hands dirty. You think about that."

Shego looked hard into the remaining eye of the woman who was making these demands. Dr. Director was right— she wasn't Kim Possible. Kim Possible, for all of her victories and all of her spirit, had often had this air of uncertainty and self-doubt about her, and had therefore been easy to ruffle at times. She was just a teenager and had probably wondered from time to time about what she was doing and what justified her actions— she hadn't been the police and she hadn't been a judge or jury, she had just been a teen vigilante, she could've been anyone— but Dr. Director was obviously a self-secure, seasoned crime fighter. She was older, more experienced, and she had a powerful organization backing her up. She truly believed that what she was doing was right— just the very name of their organization could tell you that— because the end justified the means.

This was something that Kim Possible would've learned if she'd lived to grow up, and what might've disillusioned her; sometimes, you had no choice but to get your hands a little dirty. Sometimes you had to sacrifice your own principles in order to do what you had to do. You couldn't stay a lily-white hero forever. Sometimes you moved into a moral grey area that made you wonder why or even if you were really any better than the villains that you fought— made you wonder what right you had to be a freelance justice fighter.

Shego knew; she'd been a damn hero. And she'd doubted Team Go's Cause many a time— and she supposed that Kim Possible might've done the same when it came to Team Possible. If she hadn't, then she'd been more arrogant and self-righteous than Shego had thought. She must've doubted, Shego decided; the girl hadn't been stupid. Bratty, yes, but not stupid. Shego couldn't have lost to someone stupid, after all.

Shego felt Drakken's shoulder tremble beneath her hand and knew that he'd also realized that Dr. Director and Global Justice meant business. They were almost acting like villains, the way they were threatening them, Shego thought as she squeezed his shoulder reassuringly, except they seemed to think their actions would have a good outcome instead of an evil one.

Drakken's thoughts raced by at a million miles per second, as he tried to figure out what to do, only vaguely registering the presence of Shego's hand on his shoulder.

If he agreed to their demands, he would lose the world.

He would lose the world. People would laugh at him again. He would lose Shego.

...but he couldn't let his own mother die. He couldn't. He'd be plagued by it forever. And knowing her, she'd probably come back to haunt him, nagging him until he ended up as a mental patient somewhere.

"Drew!" He heard her voice and looked into the eyes of the woman who'd raised him and who'd believed in him despite everything, saw the panic and fear there, and finally gave in. It hadn't taken him long to make the decision since they'd called him up, maybe a minute, maybe two— and yet suddenly, somehow it seemed like a minute and fifty-nine seconds too long.

It was his mother...!

When you were evil, you were supposed to stop at nothing— but you did stop, you had to stop at some point, because if you didn't, you weren't simply 'evil' anymore, you were 'inhuman', and then there was no meaning anymore, then it all broke down, then you weren't just 'mad' or 'eccentric', then you were truly insane— there was a rather thin line between 'evil' and 'inhuman', and usually you never quite knew you'd even crossed it before it was too late, but sometimes there were moments that were as clear as a bell, where the line lay there right in front of you, very hard to ignore indeed—

He began to break into a cold sweat as he wondered what Shego was thinking, what her expression was like just then, the expression that he couldn't see because she was standing behind him, but that Global Justice could see and were probably quietly drawing their own conclusions from. Would she agree? She'd often seemed as if she was just a little more evil than him, a bit more ruthless, yet at other times— then again, what did she care, it wasn't as if it was her mother— but she couldn't think— she wouldn't blame him for this, would she— oh yes, she would— but surely she would have to agree that he couldn't have done it any other way?

He swallowed hard; if she didn't agree, it looked like it was a risk he would just have to take.

"All...all right. You have your deal. I'll deactivate my robots."

Drakken didn't notice Shego sighing behind him. Neither did Global Justice.

"Good."Dr. Director said with a tight smile.

Drakken sat up straighter in his chair. "But you have to guarantee that nobody will come after us. And that we won't be sent to jail again."

Dr. Director fell silent; Drakken thought he could see her chewing the inside of her lip in thought. "We would only be able to guarantee that Global Justice and the police wouldn't come after you. If anybody had any personal vendettas, you'd be on your own."

"Fine. We'll take it."Drakken said gruffly after a moment's thought. "If you promise. And I want it in writing."He added in a strict tone.

"You have my word." Dr. Director nodded. "We'll meet you at this location in two hours."

Drakken looked at the screen, nodding again as he saw the map that popped up, and the location they'd marked off there. "Right," he mumbled, turning the screen off.

Shego jumped a little in surprise and backed out of the way when Drakken stood bolt upright and abruptly picked up one of the heavy chairs, hurling it across the room with a snarl. There was a loud crash as it shattered the fancy glass wall that had divided the room into two parts.

His fists tightened and he gritted his teeth before he turned around sharply to face the screen again, dropping down into the remaining chair.

Grimacing, he slumped forward and buried his face in his arms, growling. He didn't quite know if he felt more angry or tired or frustrated or just plain sad.

"I had a feeling my good luck was going to run out soon." His words were muffled by his arms, but his tone was clearly bitter.

"Dr. D...?" Shego took a hesitant step towards him; she knew that unlike all the other times they'd failed, this time mocking would not be tolerated. Unusually enough, though, she didn't even feel like mocking. Mocking him now would be like kicking the dead puppy of a seven-year-old boy...or maybe more like waking a sleeping bear...

"It looks like you're going to have to give up on Australia, Shego." Drakken said dully. "So go ahead. Be mad. Break something. Or leave. Do whatever you like." Now that he'd done something as stupid as deliberately giving up on the world when he'd finally had it in his clutches after all these years, surely she'd give him an earful for it, if not even wreck everything in sight...

There was a long pause where she said nothing, and he began to get nervous, wondering if it was only the calm before the storm. Slowly, he turned his head and risked a look at her. He blinked in confusion when she only walked up to him, an odd look on her face. Not anger...something else.

"Who cares?" Shego said softly, resting her hand on his arm. "I don't care." They were evil, they were supposed to be evil, but if he'd let his own mother die, even if it had been to rule the world, then she couldn't— then he simply wouldn't have been the Dr. D that she knew anymore. Then he would've been somebody she wouldn't want to know. Somebody whom she wouldn't be able to— it wouldn't have been acceptable at all. Not even for the world. Sometimes even villains had to sacrifice their principles. Just as you couldn't always be a hero, you couldn't always be evil. Sooner or later, there would be shades of gray.

"Shego...?"

With a not insignificant amount of surprise, Drakken looked into her eyes and it dawned upon him that what would have actually made her leave him would in fact have been him letting his mother die for the sake of ruling the world, and not vice versa.

"What would you have done if it had been your brothers instead?"Drakken asked quietly. "Would you have let them die?"

She only shook her head, although in a somewhat reluctant manner.

He peered at her face, his eyes searching."You really don't care? You're still staying?"

Shego set her jaw, holding his gaze with a frown as she considered how to respond. Well, sure, part of her cared; a selfish part of her would probably be kicking herself later for letting him give up all that power, their power, that they'd worked so hard for...but there were worse things to give up. Much worse.

She looked at him for a long while, and then she leaned down and gave him a careful, slow and soft kiss.

"You did it, you know."She told him in a serious voice when their lips parted, seeming to ignore the way he was staring up at her almost frightfully. "You always said you would, and you did. You don't have anything to prove now. You've proved yourself."

His eyes widened; the reason behind Shego actually paying him an honest compliment was almost even more incomprehensible to him than the reason behind the kiss. Drakken swallowed, struggling to find his voice even as it felt like a million tiny explosives had gone off in his brain at the same time. How could he speak? What was he supposed to say? And how could she be so nonchalant after doing something so unexpected? Finally, he simply decided to follow her lead and not address the issue for the time being.

"Did you ever think I could do it?"He asked, trying to ignore the way his lips were tingling and the urge to lick them.

She shrugged. "Sometimes yes, most of the time no. The odds weren't exactly in your favour. I mean, your track record sucks."

His lips tightened in offense, but with a soft, annoyed grunt, he let it go just this once. "But sometimes...?"

"Sometimes, yeah. Sometimes it did seem like it, almost."

He sagged. "Yes...almost." He hated that word.

Again, she shrugged. "That's how it goes. Most evil megalomaniacs get taken down eventually, you know. Just feel lucky we're getting out of this with our freedom and our lives intact."

"If we're getting out of this."He pointed out, frowning.

"I have a feeling GJ are gonna keep their promise."She said, sounding so unworried that he could nearly believe that she was right.

"We should get out of here, anyway."He remarked, shaking his head. "We have to go get my mother."

"Yeah," she nodded slowly, looking down at him.

"Yes."He said, but neither of them moved.

There was a pause.

"You kissed me," he said, then, as if having just realized the fact.

"Hmm," she mumbled, nodding slowly, glancing away and looking as if she didn't want to talk about it.

"Why?"

She cleared her throat. "You looked like you needed it."

He made a choked, incredulous sound. "I...looked like...but why didn't you just...hug me or something?"

"Because..."

"Because...?"

Shego made a brief grimace, shrugging with one shoulder. "Because...maybe because I needed it, too, I dunno."She said, sounding as if she would have liked not answering him at all if she could have.

He gawked at her. "You? Why?"

She shifted uncomfortably. "Look, we should get going, some people might—"

"Oh, for the love of— nobody knows we're not still the rulers of the world, Shego!" he insisted, sounding a little angry and frustrated suddenly. "Nobody will come for us yet. You can give me five minutes! So just tell me—"

She started panicking just a bit, because all of a sudden he sounded like he wasn't clueless anymore, he sounded like he was catching on, and she knew where that could go if she let it. "Just forget it—"

He scoffed irritably, gripping the armrests of his chair. "No, Shego, we have time! They said two hours, and if we take the hovercraft, we can make it there in twenty minutes."

A growl rose in her throat. "Dr. D, can you just forget—"

"Shego!"He barked, so abruptly, loudly and angrily that she found herself taking a step back as he rose from his chair like some furious monster emerging from the sea. "I just barely got out of bed an hour ago, and I've already had my mother's life threatened, world conquest has slipped through my fingers once again, and on top of that, you just hauled off and kissed me for no apparent reason— and now you're refusing to tell me why?"The volume of his voice increased even more, his facial colour turning distinctly redder and his fists bunching. "Would you please give me a break here? If you don't stop acting stupid about this, then so help me—"

"What?"She asked, shaking her head. "What would you do?"

He stared at her for a moment before deflating, slumping back down into his chair. He had nothing to threaten her with. He would never threaten her with violence, and he wasn't going to leave her; she was all he had left, all that he'd ever had, really. And it was good to have her. "Nothing," he mumbled, "But Shego— just tell me—"

"I wanted to!"She snapped. "It wasn't a pity thing, I just— I wanted to do it. I'm not sure why it was then, exactly, but...it felt right to do it then."

"Why did you do it now?"He demanded, flapping a hand uncertainly as if to broadcast his confusion. "I've just lost the world. I thought you wanted power."

She crossed her arms over her chest, sending him a flat look. "For a genius, you're kind of dumb."

"Hey! I'm not dumb!"He objected, pointing at her accusingly."Nobody would understand you right now, Little Miss Cryptic!"

Shego let out something that sounded like a mix of a scoff, a grunt and a sigh. "Look, I said I didn't know why it was now, I just...you made me think, that's all."

He blinked at her. "Think?"

"I wouldn't have stuck around all these years if I thought you were a jerk, you know."She said, and he knew enough about her to interpret that as something along the lines of you're not so bad, and I like you. That felt odd. Ordinary for anyone else, it was a rather significant confession for someone like Shego.

"And what you did just now was..."She gestured vaguely,letting her words trail off.

"Hmm?" He leaned forward expectantly; he wasn't quite sure whether she didn't want to say whatever it was or if she just didn't know what to say.

"...it impressed me. Made me think."Shego went on, biting her lip. "I like evil, but I guess I also liked knowing that there are some things that even we wouldn't do."

He was quiet for a while before he cleared his throat, looking up at her speculatively. "And is that the first time you've ever considered kissing me?"

To his surprise, her face actually turned red. "Shut up," she said eventually, in a strained kind of voice.

He grinned; that was a piece of unexpected good news. "Oh, really? So you have thought about it before?"

"Gah, just...stop asking questions, okay?"She complained, swatting at the air in front of him as if the words he was saying were bugs that were discomfiting her by buzzing too close about her. "I don't want to talk about it. And do you have any idea how smug you look right now? It's not exactly attractive, you know—"

His brow rose. "No questions?"

"No!"She barked; was he slow on the uptake on purpose or what?

"Okay," he said simply before pulling her down into his lap.

"Hey—"She objected, squirming a little. When she looked down at his face, she expected that smug grin again, but he looked perfectly serious as he reached up and cupped her cheek, pulling her closer with his other hand.

She found herself leaning down and opening her mouth to his even as he was lifting his face up towards her.

Drakken sighed into the kiss; her mouth was warm and soft and willing and moved with quiet enthusiasm against his, one of her hands at the back of his neck and the other clutching at his sleeve, holding him close. Outright affection wasn't something he was used to seeing or hearing and certainly not feeling from Shego, and it left his body humming with a sort of tangled mess of joy and happiness and fear and anticipation and awe; he groaned when she slipped her tongue into his mouth, because he knew they would have to leave soon and it would have to end.

Panting for air, he pushed her gently away. "We have to go," he said, his voice full of regret.

"Yeah...let's go." She nodded as she looked at him, her chest heaving a bit with her shallow breaths. He'd been a good kisser. She hadn't expected that. Hoped, but not expected; she'd just figured he'd never had much practice before. She'd have to ask him about that later.

She leapt off of his lap, and he got up on somewhat unsteady feet from the chair, still breathing slightly laboriously.

They exchanged a quick glance before they hurried off to their respective rooms to pack. About ten minutes later, Drakken returned to the control room. He'd allowed himself to linger wistfully for a minute or two, looking at the bedroom of the ex-ruler of the world and its stupidly oversized bed— even bigger than the last oversized bed he'd had— and when he was done, Shego was already waiting for him.

Silently, she reached out her hand for him to take.

He blinked at her; he hadn't expected her to do that, even after everything.

She must've noticed him staring, because she suddenly looked a little self-conscious, frowning at him reproachfully before retracting her offered hand.

Suddenly realizing he was being a complete and utter idiot, he stepped briskly forward and took her hand, pulling her with him out the door.

They took the hovercraft, and Shego, noticing that the Doc was looking preoccupied, piloted it.

They flew on in silence, Drakken sighing as he caught sight of the humongous, evilly grinning statue of himself. Down below, Ramesh and Chen looked like little worker ants as they chipped away at the statue. At least he'd exacted a littlebit ofhis revenge on them, he supposed...still, it was a pity...after all that hard work...

Shego rolled her eyes. "Don't tell me you're gonna be all bitter for the rest of your life now, ranting about how you could've still been the ruler of the world 'if only' you'd blah, blah, blah...!"She remarked in an exasperated tone.

Drakken turned to her, annoyance flashing in his eyes before he seemed to reconsider the situation with a faint smile. "If I did, would you leave me?"

Shego fell silent, pursing her lips in irritation as she glanced at him with a glare.

"Well?"

"Don't talk to the driver," she muttered, staring stiffly straight ahead.

Drakken only laughed at her answer, sending her a fond look that she couldn't see, but definitely felt; she scowled at the buildings she manoeuvred past, as if taking her embarrassment out on them. Damn him. He'd figured her out, and now she'd never hear the end of it. She was definitely breaking something tonight or stealing something, or kicking some henchman ass. Anything. Some physical activity to take her mind off of the unfamiliar tenderness with which he was looking at her; it was making her body and face heat up and her brain itch.

Drakken hummed to himself under his breath as they sped towards their destination. Maybe this hadn't been such a waste after all.

Shego looked at him out of the corner of her eye as he whistled a reedy tune that seemed to have no particular melody; it looked he was already in the process of recovering from his loss.

But then she'd already known that he was nothing if not an optimist. If he hadn't been, they'd given up after their very first try, way back when.

But not him; he always bounced back, no matter what.

Shego sighed, shaking her head as Drakken began idly humming what she recognized as the theme song to that terminally lame dance show he liked to watch sometimes.

She was doomed.


When they finally got to their lair, a tiresome three or four hours were spent explaining to his mother what he'd really been doing with himself all these years— she'd obviously finally figured out that it hadn't been working as a radio psychologist!

There was much yelling, scolding, reprimanding, crying, some denial and a lot of anger and disappointment.

And Shego could definitely see where Dr. D had picked up his ability to rant on and on tirelessly.

Drakken just let his mother talk and talk until she eventually seemed to decide that he'd learned his lesson and wouldn't do it again. Then she declared that she was tired after the rude treatment she'd received that day and wanted to go home, thank you very much.

At the end of the day, all Drakken had to show for his four of five days of world conquest was a broken statue in his likeness, a lot of now useless paperwork, and several small bruises on the back of his head where his mother had whapped him repeatedly for having been a 'bad boy'. He let her do it without any objections; after all, he'd been indirectly responsible for her almost being killed, and he was on a guilt trip the size of...well, Australia.

The bruises meant nothing, though, when his lips, cheeks and neck ended up being covered in black lipstick marks that evening, and when, for the first time in a very, very, very long while, he didn't spend the night alone in his bed.

He knew he'd have to start considering what to do from now on, and that it would be difficult, but he didn't have to start doing it until the next day.

Or maybe after the weekend.

Shego couldn't have agreed more.

For having only been the ruler of the world for four or five days, Dr. Director thought a week later, as she watched three of her men dragging a short, bald, kicking and screaming man who claimed to be the ruler of Scotland away from the Parliament in Edinburgh, while the rest of her men were shoveling deactivated robots onto a large truck and calming the masses of distraught people, Dr. Drakken certainly managed to do a bit of damage...

The discovery that Drakken and Shego had managed to get away with about a quarter of Bill Gates' bank account while they'd been ruling the world— and had actually cashed it all out so it couldn't even be traced to another account— hadn't been a very good start to her week, either. The thought of them doing such a tacky villain thing as sitting on a big suitcase full of money somewhere made her gnash her teeth.

She didn't know if Drakken and Shego would attempt world domination again or not, but simply knowing that they had the means to finance such an operation would certainly keep her on her toes.

The End.


Author's note: Many thanks to my beta, Zoza, for helping me out once again. Her notes were extra fun to read this time.

Could you honestly see Drakken letting his own mother die? Even for the sake of world domination? No? Good, me neither. And besides, let's face it— the KP brand of 'evil' is barely even the diet version of 'evil' compared to real life 'evil'.

And yeah, we all know Dr. D would bounce right back from even this. He always does. I deliberately kept it unknown what they're gonna do from now on— whether they're gonna keep being evil or not is up to your own imagination.

This story was written because I wanted to write a story where they actually took over the world, if only for a little while. That, and I was studying ethics and came across these two ethical theories.

Deontology: Deontological ethics or deontology (Greek: δέον (deon) meaning obligation or duty) is an approach to ethics that focuses on the rightness or wrongness of actions themselves, as opposed to the rightness or wrongness of the consequences of those actions.

In the eyes of evil, the consequences of Drakken's actions, i.e. willingly losing the world, would of course be insane, but in Drakken and Shego's opinion, they still did the right thing despite the consequences.

Utilitarianism: Utilitarianism is the ethical doctrine that the moral worth of an action is solely determined by its contribution to overall utility. It is thus a form of consequentialism, meaning that the moral worth of an action is determined by its outcome—the ends justify the means.

Dr. Director and GJ are willing to threaten and possibly end the life of a human being in order to free the world again. The moral wrongness of this action can be ignored— to them, the consequences are more important here.