A/N What is there really to tell you about. Hmm, well this story is about the whole Savers timeline through Yoshino's eyes. But of course that will be to plain and an oddly unoriginal idea. So to make it some-what original I decided to fit the whole Tamers and Digidestined team into the storyline. Especially Ruki but you'll find out why later on. Most chapters will be in Yoshino's point of view but I'm going to assume that you already knew that. Hmm, what else am I suppose to tell you now? Oh yeah! The disclaimer!
Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon what so ever. If I did then Tamers would have more than one season.
"Even my closest friend said I was finished, but I think I may be a little different from the others." -- Namie Amuro
Chapter One: Words Hurt Worse Than Anything Else
… Here I am, again…Just like the first time; I'm leaving. Last time I left my life back there; now here I am leaving the life I once had here to go back there… It's odd I couldn't live in that place and yet here I am; leaving this life to go back to that place. The same place where I once thought I couldn't live. Oh the irony of the moment. It's horrible.
I thought I could live here peacefully. No, peacefully doesn't associate correctly with this life. What I really meant was happily. This life was never peaceful. From the D-Reaper to the hundreds, no thousands of Parasimon. I wouldn't quite call that a peaceful life now would I? No, nobody would.
As time went by it became apparent to me; and probably to the rest of the team. I obviously didn't fit in here. Everybody was moving on with their lives while I was stuck being the same. Never changing. That's what I am; what I always will be. I thought I could become this person people may see today. How can I possibly become someone who doesn't exist?! It doesn't seem possible at the moment. It never did. That person's morale's clash against the ones I truly have. The ones I was always supposed to have.
It was ridiculous. Just like my life here was. It was a dream; it always was. The dream of a pathetic and hopeless girl. I realize now. I realize now that I was a fool for thinking I could be accepted here. I never did. It was obvious; so obvious. I just couldn't see it. I was pathetic… I failed here just like I did back there…
… There's that feeling again… That drowning feeling… God I hate that feeling…
What? The Digimon Queen can't take the truth…? Pathetic…
I try to swallow the lump that formed in my throat… The funny thing is that I just can't swallow it. Why…? I already know the answer to that…
Those words he said… They hit me hard… Oh so very hard… They hit harder than any attack from some random digimon. They hit hard because… because it was the truth. I am pathetic, I always have been. I was pathetic for running. Running away… That's all I ever done. Is that the only thing that I can do correctly… If so then I'm even more pathetic than I thought before.
… Damn you…
Why did you say those words? Why couldn't you say something else? Of all times; he picked that of all times to actually be serious. That one moment… Those few words… In that one moment with those few words; he crushed my dreams… My hopes… My haven… My utopia…
… I hate you…!
"Baka!"… I hear my words echo across the horizon… Who am I to critize? I'm just as bad, if not worse.
What's that? I look up at the unbroken clouds. In an instant I feel countless drops of water hit my face. It's raining; that's what that sound was. Does that mean that the sky feels the same way as I do? This might seem odd but I always believed that when it rains… It means that the world is crying; crying for the most pathetic thing out there. Could that thing be me? If these are really tears could they be tears of laughter? Am I so pathetic that even the world shows me no pity.
I let out a choked breath… Can't anything go my way? Everybody else got what they wanted… I never did… I never will…
"R-Ruki?" I hear my name being called from behind me… No that never was my name…
I turn around to see who called my name… Raramon… This digitama shaped creature… Pink and green… Arms and legs no bigger than that of babies'. No maybe even smaller. Two big black eyes. Eyes so innocent; always seem to be smiling at you even though her mouth never shows it. I really missed her, five years ago I met her. She gave me hope. But I doubt even she can help me… No one can now...
"…Don't call me that…!" The words came out harsher than they were supposed to be. A cold and harsh whisper. That's what they were… That's not what they were supposed to be… I guess I want people to know that I'm still strong on the outside… Even if that strength is somewhat exaggerated…
"I'm sor—." "Don't you dare apologize! You have no reason to be sorry… You never did… it wasn't your fault… It was mine… It always has been… always…" Those last words barely above a whisper. Has my voice always been this soft? This weak? Probably so… Weak and fragile; that's what I've become… That's probably what I've always been.
"It's okay. I just want you to be happy, you know…?" "… Yes… I know…" At the time it really didn't seem like a question, but I answered it anyway.
"So what should I do with this?" I see her raise up something in her hand. A blue device. No bigger than that of my fist… Just looking at it flares up my anger…
"… Let me see it…" I already know what to do with it… What I want to do with it… As Raramon floats over to me; device in hand… I know exactly what to do with it…
As soon as I feel my D-Ark in my hands my hands clench around it… I can feel the device leave indents into my hand… I barely realize how much it really hurts though.
I walk over to the edge. The edge of the building. The building of my arrival; the building of my departure. I raise my fist up and over my head, device still in hand. So many memories; so many memories this one device holds. So many memories that I'd rather forget.
I lower my fist. Releasing my D-Ark over the edge. No, not releasing; more like throwing. I barely caught a glimpse of the device flying towards the ground. Flying down at speeds I can never hope to obtain.
That's all I heard. As I heard the device slam against the ground. I feel no regrets. Only thing I hope for is that I didn't hit anyone with it. Wouldn't want to prolong my departure no more than I already did. Now that would not be good.
I feel satisfaction. The satisfaction that one gets from knowing that something finally went in their favor… If only everything did…
"Are you ready to go? You're soaking wet!" Raramon's overly cheery voice is not making me feel better... Not at all… "Don't worry about it… I-I'm okay… Let's go." I swiftly leave the spot I once occupied. My steps barely audible above the splatter of rain drops on the concrete below me. Raramon quickly following after me. The rotors of the helicopter rapidly spinning. The bright light from the helicopters' open doors. That much is obvious.
I hear the splatter of water as I take my first step into the helicopter. The warm heat of the helicopter; warming my cold body. My body's raked shivers made me realize. Maybe I was out in the rain a little too long. Oh well too late to complain now.
" Ahh! Ruki! I knew you were out in the rain to long. I knew I should have made you come in sooner. What was I thinking. How foolish of me." I quickly occupy a seat while Raramon is still rambling on. I pay no attention to it. I only heard something about a blanket, and… the flu? Meh, it doesn't matter now.
I feel some extra warmth as Raramon drapes a thin blanket over my shoulders. It's not much but it helps. It helps a lot.
"Now I bet that feels much better! Huh Ruki?!" I smile a little. Such a strange digimon she is.
"Yes it feels much better. Thank you." I may not be able to see it; but I can already tell that Raramon is pretty happy. I can tell because I can feel this happy aura radiating around her. I couldn't help but smile a little. Who wouldn't?
" Oh, and don't call me by that name? I thought I told you that already." It may seem odd but for some reason; I really despise that name. Oddly enough I'm the one who chose the name, and now I'd rather forget that it even exists.
"Oh… well if you don't want me to call you Ruki. What should I call you then?" What indeed. In all actuality I haven't even thought about that. If I continue to be called Ruki then I will have to someday return to that life. But if I go by my real name then I'll have to return to the life of a failure. Now that I think of it; no matter what I choose. It would still result in me being a failure. One being unable to do what my sisters could do. While the other is unable to compare to the power that my friends hold. To me the answer is clear cut.
Yes . I have made my decision. It is more than obvious now. I refuse to return to West Shinjuku. I refuse to return to those… Those people I refuse!
As the helicopter takes flight. As we head to our destination. I am more than prepared to leave. To leave the memories. To leave the people. To leave all the lies. I'm prepared; I'm ready to become the person I always was supposed to be.
"Call me by my real name… Call me… Yoshino… Yoshino Fujieda... That's what I want to be called now."
Chapter One: End
A/N Now I'm actually quite pleased with how this chapter turned out to be. It soothes me. Anyway, you're all probably wondering how in the world can Ruki become Yoshino. All things should be revealed in due time. In the next chapter I'll explain how Ruki's hair can become anything like Yoshino's hair. I'll also explain some of the things that the tamers might be going through during Ruki's/Yoshino's departure. You all will find out later though. Oh and this story will go along with that of the Japanese Digimon Savers, because lets face it the English version sucks. I watched episode seven in English an I was pretty pissed. What the freak! Citramon! What the hell is that, and that bull about flooding the amusement park. Oh god that was so pathetic. Seriously am I the only one who noticed how horrible the ideas that some of the shows displayed here in America suck! How does BomberNanimon become, Citramon; a freaking pineapple. God that's so pathetic. Whatever, I could probably bore you guys forever with this one subject but I think we all have lives we need to attend to so I have nothing else that I want to explain at the moment so, dehamata! Oh and don't forget to review!