Imperfect One-shots

Written by: Ie-maru


ProngingPotter: I LOVE THIS!! Can't wait to see what McGonagall does to the Dursleys. I would love to beta this story and the other one as well. Not really familiar with Naruto but its not a central focus of the story; just the techniques he's using, etc so its easy for me to follow. Got to go, I've got a French test. ugh.

Ie-maru: I'm so glad you love it! I just love reading your reviews, and yours made me really happy after that funk of a chapter. I'm happy you understand it, as it wouldn't be any good if my readers didn't. I understand about your alt. language woes, as I take Spanish. Btw, I'm glad you've decided to be my beta; here's the first chapter of the other story, and it'll go the same way as the Defense Association one. It's called Gray Dawn, and when I get some feedback on it I'll start posting it separately. I've got like six chapters done, and am in the middle of the seventh. Hopefully you guys can inspire me to get out of the writer's block I've found myself with considering this one.

Lildevil425: i love it! maan, i hope you do more crossovers since its so hard to find good ones that don't have bad grammar in it. hope you update soon! ja mata!

Ie-maru: I'm so happy you enjoyed it, as I was a little unsure about the feedback I would receive. Here's the update, but there won't be so much cross-over in it unless it's by reference, I think. Like I told Supaiku-keiteki, this is just the first chapter, I have more and plan to write more, but I need some help to get out of the slump I'm in with it.

For those who haven't been reading the responses I give to those who review, I'll repeat it again. This story is one I started before the one I said might be called Defense Association or whatever. It was in the last chapter. I have other chapters waiting to be posted, but I'd like to get out of my slump I have with it, so please help me out. Meanwhile, enjoy the chapter! (And don't forget to review!)

This is dedicated to AquaRias, who's wanted to see this for a very, very long time (I'm not even sure Aqua's still waiting for me, I've taken that long) and ProngingPotter (Supaiku-keiteki), who's remained a very faithful reviewer and supporter (you rock!).

Disclaimer: I hardly think that it's neccessary to say that I don't own Harry Potter. If I did you'd be paying me to read this and I'd be laying in a pile of money. Neither is true so far, lol.


"During the best of times humans revel in the times of peace, but it's during the times of war that we look back and see how much we took all of that for granted." – Ie-maru


It was humid today; the afternoon of the first day of the second season; -summer-, and he didn't feel it. Not the scorching heat or the hot humid air that passed through his lungs with each slow breath. None of it registered in his mind, he was simply too numb. Some would call it shock, for how he watched, green eyes glazed out of the car windows as they drove back to Surrey from Kings Cross, London. But in truth a certain memory just kept replaying over and over in his mind, keeping him hostage from reality perhaps as he watched his godfather, Sirius Black, fall into the Veil with an almost morbid fascination and muted horror. The face of his godfather seemed to change from shock at being hit, to fear, and finally to some sick resignation as he realized what was going on as comrades and enemies paused to watch his decent; that he was going to die.


His uncle's screaming brought him out of his trance, for that he was thankful, and he turned so his still slightly glazed green orbs would meet those piggish beads called eyes placed on a pudgy puce background that was his uncle's face.

"I hadn't expected anything less, Uncle Vernon."

The boy's uncle, Vernon Dursley, was slightly freaked out at the unemotional tone in his freak nephew's voice, coupled with the dead eyes that didn't seem to entirely focus on him; he just harrumphed and turned his head quickly to focus on the road, and to avoid the eyes that seemed to see strait through him.

Harry Potter, the bearer of the green eyes and haunted memories, simply looked outside the window of the car again and delved once more into the nightmares that even managed to haunt him in the waking world.

Dudley, the boy's cousin and Vernon's only son, was trying to be as far away from his cousin at the moment as he could manage; squeezing his large mass into the car door in an effort to put some room between them as the boy who looked more like a pig with a blonde lump tossed on his head, though his mass did look slightly more muscular than usual no doubt due to his boxing, gave his 'freakish' cousin a strange look.

Petunia Dursley, Harry's aunt, turned her head from the front passenger's seat to give her nephew a strange look as well, before looking away again to ponder what may have made him seem so…distant.

As the small car pulled into 4 Privet Drive, a street of relatively normal houses all looking alike, the family of four got out of the vehicle, Harry taking a bit longer having to lug his school trunk and Hedwig's cage out of the trunk of the car. Hedwig, Harry's snowy owl and means of wizarding communication, was flying home as Harry had no doubts she'd prefer over riding home in her cage.

Harry walked slowly to the front door and soundlessly closed it behind him as he heard his uncle complaining under his breath about 'ungrateful brats making us wait for him and wasting the air-conditioning'. Harry ignored this and lugged his trunk and cage upstairs to his room, noting absently that his relatives hadn't yet asked, or demanded more like, that his 'freakish things' be locked in the cupboard.

His relatives downstairs were still out of sorts with the 'freak's' behavior, and too disturbed to even consider trying to lock his things away this summer, which was indeed fortunate for the numb boy who at the moment was all but closed off from the world around him.

The next day Harry woke to see his owl had made it home fine last night, and got up to close the window which was letting in the hot humid air, the probable cause of the sweat causing his boxers and overlarge shirt to cling to him, or it could have been the nightmare he'd had to endure again last night.

"Hello love," Harry cooed to her, "would you like some breakfast?"

Hedwig cooed back in affirmative, and nibbled his fingers affectionately as he moved to pat her plumage.

"Alright then," he gave a small smile to her; his first and most loyal friend, and gave her an owl treat, "I'll go make some and bring some leftovers up for you."

Hedwig clicked her beak happily and accepted the owl treat from her master and, while eating it, watched him with unblinking amber eyes as he went downstairs to cook breakfast for his, in her and many other people's opinion, undeserving family.

Petunia Dursley was slightly surprised as she hesitantly went to wake her nephew, only to find him downstairs already and halfway finished with the normal Dursley breakfast consisting of eggs, bacon, toast, and a few pancakes.

"I'm almost done Aunt Petunia, if you might set the table for me we can eat in about ten minutes," he called out, startling her.

Petunia was about to protest when she saw his still dead eyes gazing at her unblinkingly, and she then only nodded mutely and hurried to set the table with the appropriate china and silverware.

Harry, who was expecting his aunt to rudely refuse and tell him to do it, shrugged and went back to cooking; again only absently noting that his relatives were acting strangely this summer.

Breakfast had gone well, well…at least it was fine for Harry; his relatives however seemed tense and spoke only briefly, their attention rather on the emerald eyed boy, who seemed to take no notice of them, than on regular conversation. After finishing his breakfast, having left a piece of toast and bits of bacon for Hedwig, Harry waited in silence for his relatives to finish their breakfast before washing the dishes. After they had Vernon left for work, Dudley left with his friends; or his 'gang' as some would call them, and Petunia suited herself to watch the neighbors, all the while trying not to stare at her nephew to figure the freak out and at the same time trying not to garner his attention, having no desire to meet his eyes just yet.

Harry grabbed his dish, upon which sat the leftovers from breakfast, and swiftly climbed the stairs before walking into his room; the smallest room of the house that was so 'graciously' given to him seeing on how it was Dudley's -second- bedroom.

"Here you are love," cooed Harry as he placed the dish in front of her, watching her eat and giving her a pat before walking to his desk to begin writing his letter to the order.

Dear Order,

I'm perfectly fine, for the moment, and the Dursleys have been surprisingly quiet. If you haven't already surmised through my letter I am still alive and breathing, so there is no reason to break the door down to search for my ghastly corpse.


It was a strange letter, he knew, but he still wasn't completely happy with the order, and in particular Dumbledore. He really didn't see the point of having a watch outside his home nearly 24/7, unless Dumbledore had lied to him about the -oh so splendid blood protection- he earned from his aunt. Of course, the fact that Voldemort used his blood in his resurrection could be part of the reason as well.

Shrugging at his darkening thoughts Harry collected the plate from Hedwig when she finished and sent her to Headquarters with his, as he dubbed it, humorously morbid letter; he couldn't help but give a small chuckle at the thought of what their faces would look like when they read it.

your fault…Your fault…YOUR fault…It's all YOUR FAULT!

Harry woke in a cold sweat, gasping for breath. He had just taken a nap after Hedwig left, not really feeling refreshed from the previous nights' fleeting sleep. His dream had depicted his parents, Cedric, and Sirius; only not in a good way, more of a nightmare really. They were all pale, and gathered around him shouting his fault in their deaths.

Hedwig's concerned hoot brought him from his memory of the nightmare, and he smiled tiredly at her.

"Did the Order of Kentucky Fried Chicken send me a reply love?"

His owl looked at him amusedly from his nickname for the order, but gave him a negative hoot and went back to drinking from her water dish as Harry once again closed the window, wondering fleetingly if he had missed lunch as he saw that it was nearly one thirty in the afternoon already. When Harry opened the door; however, he saw that his aunt had left him half a turkey sandwich and a side of crisps.

'Well, how thoughtful of her,' Harry thought; taking the meal back into his room as he planned his day.

Finishing up his meal and taking the plate downstairs to wash Harry decided he'd take a quick run through the park and come back to weed the garden, as he didn't think his uncle would be too happy if he did nothing today. Quickly scribbling a note and tossing it carelessly on the counter Harry went out for his run…the order member on watch could just keep up with him for all he cared.

'Some would call this running from your problems,' Harry mused, 'but it certainly makes me feel better, and that's all that matters to me right now.'

Harry did find some amusement in his run too, as he could hear the out-of-shape order member's harsh breathing as he or she attempted to keep up with his near break-neck gait as he attempted to outrun his nightmares and morbid memories. Taking pity, but more because he himself was getting a little tired, he stopped to sink into one of the many park benches when he arrived a few minutes later.

'I used to be able to run farther than that,' Harry thought, criticizing himself, 'when Dudley and his friends would go Harry Hunting. But now I can barely make a few blocks; I guess quiddich doesn't really give you a full workout, seeing as how it's only your arms really doing anything when your bum's plastered to a broom. I really need to get in better shape.'

Deciding his little break was over after a minute or so Harry got up again and started running back to the Dursley's; taking pleasure out of the gasps and muttered curses he heard behind him all the way back.

Harry didn't mind weeding and taking care of the garden really; actually, something inside of him relished in the feeling that they grew so healthily because of him, and relied on him to stay so during the summer. So there he sat, in his overly large hand-me-downs looking for all the world like elephant skin as they swallowed his small, malnourished form.

'Something else that needs fixing; I just hope there are potions or charms out there that can do it. I really don't favor staying the shortest in my year forever,' Harry thought morosely while yanking a particularly stubborn weed from the bed of assorted flowers.

As Harry whipped the dirt from his hands and made his way to the door he added finding a way to reverse his malnourishment to his mental list.

'Maybe I should start writing this down?' Harry mused humorously as he climbed the stairs to his room again.

Things to Do This Summer

1-Get in Shape

2-Find a Way to Reverse My Malnourishment

'Well,' Harry thought, 'it's a start at least. Now to make a schedule to fix the first one and see what I can do about the second.'


7:30- Cook breakfast

7:50- Breakfast



8:45-Light exercise

9:10-Chores; garden, mowing, cleaning, washing car or windows, etc




Harry nodded, 'It will do, for now; now to start on the solution for the second problem'.

Dear Hermione,

First of all, thank you so much for standing beside me all these years and being my loyal friend even when I was being a stupid foolish Gryffindor. I should have listened to you that night Hermes, but I didn't; and for that I am sorry. Not only did Sirius die, but you and Ron were hurt for my err in judgment; though I do realize that I am not the only one to blame I owe you an apology and sincerely hope you accept it.

Should you accept it, and still wish to be my friend, I have a little question I wanted an answer to, and the best way to get it is to ask you.

Do you know any ways, muggle or magical, that can reverse malnourishment?

With Bated Breath

-Harry Potter

Harry smiled briefly, he knew his loyal friend would forgive him; though her letter might take a few days as she studied and cross examined resources for an answer to his question, as she was prone to do.

Now it was time for a shower, and then he'd cook dinner and retreat to the realm of dreams, or in his case nightmares.

Dinner had gone quite like breakfast had, quiet and tense; though it seemed like Harry noticed none of this. Afterwards Harry did the dishes again and went upstairs, leaving the window open so Hedwig could go out for a late night hunt and wondering how long it took the Ministry to send the results of the OWL tests.

Dismissing the passing thought Harry climbed into his bed, early though it was, to once more try to sleep peacefully, though he doubted he would without a few Dreamless Sleep potions.

'Maybe I should grab a couple of those to use once in awhile, this is getting me nowhere,' he thought tiredly, closing his eyes and dropping into a restless sleep that would, no doubt, be wrought with nightmares.

"Step aside you foolish girl!" Lily refused; she stood her ground between the monster that killed her husband and wanted to kill her child.

"Let's both take the cup," Harry suggested, Cedric nodded and on three they grabbed the cup, only to be whisked away by portkey to a graveyard.

"Kill the spare!"

Sirius was taunting Bellatrix, only to be thrown back by a stunner into the veil, only realizing what was really happening when it was too late and he was already descending into the reaches of the veil.

Once again Harry awoke gasping for breath and in a cold sweat.

'Those potions sound like a -really- good idea now. Oh, what's this?'

There were two envelopes on his desk, one from Gringotts and one from the Ministry. The Ministry's was probably his OWLS, but he didn't have a clue towards the letter from Gringotts.

'Well, shall we find out?' Harry walked over to the desk and held the Gringotts letter in his hands, his eyes drifting over the impressive seal before he slowly opened it, wondering passively if it was anything really important.

Dear Mr. Potter,

We, of Gringotts staff, would first like to give you our condolences upon the recent death of your godfather, one Sirius Orion Black. We would also like to inform you upon the reading of Lord Black's Will on the eighteenth of July. Should you not be able to attend we suggest naming a representative to attend in your stead.

May gold flow into your vaults,


The only thing keeping Harry from becoming a wreck and a sobbing mess was the fact that he still felt numb, too numb to allow that with the reading of his will that Sirius, his only real father-figure, was dead and gone. It was like a layer of ice and fog was between the events and his emotions, not allowing him to respond as he would normally. The protective layer, that was what was keeping him currently sane Harry liked to think, reminded him of his first Hogwarts winter; the snow falling around him and Hedwig's feathers falling with the dainty snowflakes as she reveled in the freedom of flight, his own breath swirling as it came through his mouth to caress his face in white wisps. The cold embraced him like a lover, keeping him numb and protecting him from the world as its freezing tendrils wrapped around him protectively; the thought made him smile.

'Well, I don't think the Order of KFC is going to let me go…I'll have to name a representative, but who can I trust to truthfully tell me all of which Sirius bequeathed me; not hiding it for the 'greater good'? Hmmm…I think, yes; that will do nicely.'

Dear Locktooth,

I am afraid that I cannot personally attend the reading of Sirius Black's will, for various reasons, and must name Griphook the Goblin as my representative for the reading. I request that Griphook send me a copy of Sirius' will and a report of all of my current holdings after what my godfather bequeathed me is added to them; I also trust that all transactions between me and Gringotts will be kept confidential.

May gold flow into your vaults as well,

-Harry James Potter

Harry smirked; he'd like to see Dumbledore keep this from him now, as he had no doubt he was probably trying to do.

'Git should've been a Slytherin.'

Seeing that Hedwig had not yet returned from her hunt last night Harry set his letter aside to send later and went to read what the Ministry had for him.

Dear Mr. Potter,

Enclosed in this letter are your scores for the June sitting of your Ordinary Wizarding Levels, or commonly referred to as OWL scores. Afterwards it would be wise to notify the learning establishment or persons responsible for your education what classes and electives you will partake in the following school year.

The grades available to earn are as follows:

O-Outstanding (two owls)

EE-Exceeds Expectations (one owl)

A-Acceptable (one owl)



The classes you have currently taken OWL testing on are as follows:

Astronomy: Theory- A (read: Note)

Practical- A (read: Note)

Care of Magical Creatures: Theory- O

Practical- O

Charms: Theory- EE

Practical- O

Defense Against the Dark Arts: Theory- O

Practical- O+

Divination: Theory- A

Practical- T

Herbology: Theory- EE

Practical- O

History of Magic: Theory- A (read: Note)

Practical- N/A

Potions: Theory- A

Practical- EE

Transfiguration: Theory- EE

Practical- EE

Note: These grades have been modified in light of recent events.

Congratulations Mr. Potter, you have received a total score of twenty-two point five owls; and the first in fifty years to score extra on the Defense Against the Dark Arts section. If you should decide to remain a student of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry than you can continue the following classes:

Care of Magical Creatures


Defense Against the Dark Arts



Electives available at Hogwarts include the following:


Muggle Studies

Ancient Runes


Enchantment of Objects


Dianne Dithers

Head of England's Magical Education Bureau

Harry frowned contemplatively; did he really want to go to Hogwarts? From the very start everyone concerned thought it was the safest place in England, yet look at what all had happened during his stay there. In first year part of the staff, Professor Quirrell, was after the Sorcerer's Stone and even had Voldemort himself on the back of his head. In second year Tom Marvolo Riddle, the younger version of Voldemort, had reopened the Chamber of Secrets, let out the Basilisk, and nearly drained the life of Ginny Weasley. In third year they found out a murderer had been in the Weasley family as a pet, an innocent escaped convict broke into their dormitory, and they had a werewolf for a professor. In fourth year another member of the staff worked for Voldemort while pretending to be Mad-Eye Moody, while the real Mad-Eye was locked in his own trunk, Cedric had been killed, and Voldemort had been revived. And then just last year Voldemort had been torturing him through his dreams, caught him in a trap in the Department of Mysteries, his godfather died, the prophesy had been revealed to him, and he blew up Dumbledore's office; though Harry had to admit, it had been very satisfying to do so. After all of that one had to realize that Hogwarts was not safe; this and the fact that Dumbledore was the Headmaster just solidified his opinion on the matter.

'No, I don't think I'll be attending Hogwarts this year Ms. Dithers.'

Harry chuckled lightly, and then paused.

'Wait…I blew up Marge in third year, and last year blew up Dumbledore's office; both without a wand. Didn't Hermes say something about accidental magic usually stopping by now? Now that I think on it, my 'explosions' as we'll call them,' Harry had to stop to chuckle at his own joke, 'happened during intense emotion. What's the sole difference then between accidental magic and wand magic? More things to add to my list then.'

Putting down the Ministry letter Harry went to grab his abandoned quill and started adding things to his list.

'Now, I should probably wait to mail Hogwarts considering my education. Dumbledore, meddling fool that he is, will try to stop me, so I should find a way to hide from him and his KFC Order. This is going to require more planning and even more things added to my list.'

Things to Do This Summer

1-Get in Shape

2-Find a Way to Reverse My Malnourishment

3-Find proper materials and laws considering Home Schooling

4-Buy a book on Magic theory

5-Get muggle and magical emancipation

6-Create a false identity

7-Buy proper clothes, shelter, etc

8-Find a source of income

"That'll do, for now," Harry muttered to himself.

"Now to go and make breakfast. I'll mail the Gringotts reply when Hedwig gets back in, do my stretches, and then go out for my run."

Harry suddenly smirked.

'I wonder who's on guard duty today,' he mused humorously.


A/N: Yeah, that's the first chapter. A little down, but don't worry, Harry's luck will turn up. Please provide ideas, whatever they are; they could really help.

Please respond in a review, whether it's a beta pointing out an error or a place to be improved upon, an idea, or just to tell me you enjoy it. Betas, don't feel restricted to just pointed out errors etc, I'd like to hear your ideas and feedback too.

If you haven't gotten it yet, I really, really, would like you to review, lol.