Hello! Thank you all so much for coming to read my fanfiction. I would like to take this time to say that my dear friend, Osaka, was the one who gave me the title and the one who inspired me to write this in the first place. She is also the author of its sister story "Big things. Stupid packages" It is a Fruits Basket fanfiction.
I would like to also give a shout out to Celina Young. She is another friend of mine here on Fanfiction. Celina loves Sesshomaru and can't take a joke about him. For the time, she hasn't seen this. If I never post another fic you know what happened.
Sesshomaru, Rin, and Jaken were walking though an open field surrounded by green grass. All around was the soft sound of crickets chirping and above was a radiant sapphire sky that had only a few beautiful pillow-like clouds floating in its mitts.
Rin skipped merrily though this beauty, humming under her breath as the grass tickled her ankles. Even Jaken couldn't help but gaze in aw at the beauty of the day. Everything was wonderful, serene.
But, as it is with all things, it couldn't last forever. Rin noticed the second the alien sound entered her world. Its high pitched screech can only be compared to letting the air slowly out of a balloon, though Rin didn't know that of course.
To her the sound was alien, and she had heard nothing like it in her short memories. At least not coming from Sesshomaru.
She stopped her skipping and turned to him slowly, staring in wide eyed wonder as the sound continued to emit itself from Sesshomaru's buttock. He was frozen still, eyes staring blindly at the ground in front of his feet. Jaken looked up at him with utter shock, mouth agape.
Finally the squeaking sound stopped and reality sunk in. Lord Sesshomaru, terror of the West, had farted. No, pooted would be a better word for the high pitched noise the terrifying lord had produced.
When Rin realized the inescapable truth her giggles were hard to suppress. She struggled to choke them down, but, in the end, failed. Her stifled laughter was what brought Jaken back among the living.
"Shut up Rin!" Jaken squawked, coming fully out of his daze. "It isn't Lord Sesshomaru's fault that he is suddenly flatulent!" At that Sesshomaru's back stiffened and his gaze refocused. Looking more awkward then the demon lord had ever appeared, he began a vain attempt to proceed as if the previous event had not occurred.
"Come," Sesshomaru commanded chillingly.
Jaken noticed the small change in his lord's behavior. "Now look what you've done Rin!" he whispered angrily before quickly turning to follow Sesshomaru.
Did I upset Lord Sesshomaru? Rin questioned herself silently. What if he is really sad? Did it really embarrass him? Why did I laugh? That had to make things so much worse! Her innocent thoughts raged.
Rin stood right were Jaken had left her, and showed no signs of moving as her mind raced with thoughts of how to make Sesshomaru feel better. Finally she had it!
"What are you waiting for Rin?" squawked the ever annoying voice of Jaken. Sesshomaru stopped and took a half step back so he could easily see the small girl.
"Rin?" he questioned coldly. She gave him no reply. Rin seemed to be stugglinng with her own mind. Then, out of no where, Rin burst into movement.
She balled her hands into tiny fists and rammed them against both sides of her face while bending her knees slightly. Her face was then taken over by an expression that can best be descried as the look of one who is painfully constipated.
"What are you doing girl?!" Jaken screech.
Nothing could prepare them for what they next heard.
Rin's giant release of flatulence exploded though the air like an unexpected cannon blast, making her kimono rippled in the self made wind.
Then a sulfurous stench covered the beautiful smell of new grass. It was a horrific odder, and, if one looked closely, even the grass seemed to wilt from its might. Such a powerful sound and smell had never come from something so small.
All in all, it was just too much for poor Jaken to take. He passed out into a dead faint.
The sound and stench even made Sesshomaru's jaw drop. This was a mistake he quickly fixed, for you could taste this fart in the very air. It attacked his tough with such ferocity he momentary feared that his taste buds had been burned clean off. The flavor left in his mouth proved him otherwise.
Sesshomaru will never admit it, but Rin's actions did indeed make him feel better. After all traces of the smell (and taste) had vanished, that is.
So, what do you think? I rather like the idea of Rin having dyspepsia. (having a large amount gas in the body) I don't mine flame. If you think it was bad or that it could be improved in anyway, please tell me why or how. I want to get better and need your help to. Though I don't mind nice comments, of course. - Thank you all for reading!