Spoilers: Through 1x8
Disclaimer: If I owned Gossip Girl,Chuck would have appeared in last night's episode.
Nate is the perfect man, Blair reflects, as she holds up a purple Eleanor Waldorf original to her frame and assesses it critically in the mirror. Some girls shy away from three-hundred-and-sixty-degree mirrors, because they highlight their flaws. Blair is drawn to them.
But really, Blair thinks, what more could a girl ask for? Nate is stunningly handsome with a chiseled physique and could easily pose on the cover of a romance novel if he ever needed extra money (but he won't ever need money). He comes from a highly respected and wealthy Upper East Side socialite family. He is courteous and gentlemanly and has always tried to please her.
This is why, Blair decides, she needs to get him back. She'll host yet another party, wear yet another fabulous dress, and hopefully, sweep Nate off his feet for the first time.
Then Serena steps out from Blair's bedroom, posing dramatically in an old castoff dress that Blair bought two years ago at Barney's. Although it looked passably fashionable on Blair when she purchased it, when Serena wears the dress now it looks as if she just walked off the runways in Milan. "What do you think?" Serena asks, pouting her lips in a model pose.
Blair successfully stifles a groan of annoyance. "It's hideous," she says flatly. "I bought that ratty old thing years ago." Serena's face falls only slightly as Blair steps away from the mirror. "Here," Blair says, handing the purple dress to Serena magnanimously. "This one will be perfect."
As Serena goes to change, Blair scans the racks of her wardrobe, looking desperately for the outfit that will set her apart from the crowd. From Serena.
Blair thinks that maybe Chuck is her punishment as she lies under him on his bed at his Palace suite. Her punishment because she failed. Her brand-new designer original gown that she paid $1300 for at Barney's that afternoon lay crumpled on the floor, a testament to her failure. After all, it wouldn't matter if Serena walked into the party wearing nothing but a paper bag and Blair wearing the finest silk in all the world: Nate still wouldn't be able to keep his eyes off of Serena.
Chuck places tiny kisses on her collarbone and starts to gently trail them down her chest. Blair feels herself becoming increasingly aroused. Her traitorous body knows what her mind cannot accept: Chuck is a far better lover than Nate ever was.
Luckily, Blair has always been accomplished in the skill of putting mind over matter. She gently pushes Chuck up, eliciting a frustrated moan, and picks her dress up from the floor and smoothing out the wrinkles.
"He's not coming back to you, you know," Chuck tells her in a knowing tone, trying to contain his annoyance.
Blair ignores him as she slides her foot into her seven-hundred-dollar Manolo Blahniks and adjusts the strap.
Chuck exhales loudly and clenches his fists, the nails digging into his skin. "God! Why are you so hung up on him?" Blair pauses fractionally, her back still to him, but he notices and seizes the moment. "It's not like he even likes you! Everybody knows he fucked Serena last year and can't get over her-" He has gone too far. Blair grabs her purse, adjusts the hem of her dress, and marches out.
It is only once she has slammed the door that the tears begin to fall. Thank goodness she remembered to wear waterproof mascara. These days, she doesn't leave home without it.
Serena and Blair share coffee at the nearest Starbucks to Tiffany's, planning to make a stop there afterwards to fill in their holiday wishlists.
"So where did you go after the party ended last night?" Serena offers, stirring some sugar into her latte. "Usually you stay at least an hour afterward opening all the hostess-presents people bring you."
Blair does not answer and instead focuses on the black-and-white twin-tailed mermaid in the Starbucks logo on her coffee cup, tracing the waves of her hair. Mermaids never had any trouble getting men to fall in love with them. Men just saw them and were entranced.
Wonder who that reminded Blair of?
Serena waves her hand. "Hello? Earth to B? Did you hear me?"
Blair looks up, dazed. "Yeah, I heard you. Sorry." To give herself a minute, she takes a drink from her nonfat soy latte.
Serena laughs. "It's okay. You've been so out of it today." She sips her own coffee. "So happened last night to make you all dizzy-girl?"
Blair blushes. She can't help it.
"Oh my God, B, is it a guy?" Serena's mouth opens into a perfect 'o'. "Was it romantic? Did your shining white knight give you a ride home in his limousine?" Serena is almost right.
It is when Blair bites her lip that Serena figures it out. "It isn't Chuck again, is it?" Serena says disdainfully. Blair looks at her. Serena scoffs. "Come on Blair, you can do so much better. Besides, he's like a serial rapist or something. He's disgusting. Weren't you planning on trying to get Nate back?"
Blair says nothing, lips pressed together in a thin line. Her mouth is filled with all the words she wants to say, like 'Can't you see that Nate can't even remember who I am anymore because of you?' or 'If you had stayed at boarding school, I wouldn't have lost Nate in the first place.' Instead she takes another delicate sip of her latte, pats her mouth with her napkin, and rises.
"Which diamond cuts do you want to look at for your Christmas earrings this year? I'd like to see a selection of princess cuts this year, personally."
Beauty may have power, but only Blair knows how to wield it.
She would make the perfect damsel in distress, Blair decides. Just enticingly powerful enough to make sure her prince seeks her out, but subtle enough to make sure he believes his success was his doing. Smart enough so that her prince would only ever see her, the object of his rapture, as idyllic and innocent.
Not for Chuck, though. Chuck would not be a good prince in this story. Chuck saw right through her and smirked at every sneaky scheme she came up with. Nate would be perfectly swept away by Blair's plans, but Chuck? Chuck would do everything he could to foil them.
This occurs to Blair as she stands in front of Chuck's doorway as he stares at her incredulously.
"You knocked?" He says finally in a hoarse, maybe hopeful, voice as he never takes his eyes off of hers.
Blair considers her possible responses. There are many. Which one will please Chuck? Which one is the right one?
With Nate, she knows that she would never have had to respond. Nate would wrap her in his arms and hold her, like a proper white knight. But this isn't Nate's door.
She knows which response will please Serena, and that is the one that involves leaving. Blair doesn't want to do that, not anymore. Not with Chuck.
She doesn't know what she wants, and she tells Chuck just that.
With a hint of a smile on his face, he silently draws her inside and she allows herself to be comforted in a way that Nate, a perfect gentleman, would never have offered.
Blair had already come to the conclusion that Nathaniel Archibald was the ideal white knight. But for the first time, she thinks that perhaps he is the champion for somebody other than herself.
A/N: Yeah. My first fic ever. Like it? Hate it? That's okay! As long as you review and tell me:)