I own nothing from the Harry Potter Universe

Hermione regrettably drifted awake, grasping desperately at the quickly dissipating slumber that had previously enveloped her senses. Cracking one eyelid lethargically, she felt her heart skip as her gaze connected sharply with Draco Malfoy's silver irises.

"About time you woke up, lazybones, my arm was beginning to fall asleep," Draco drawled, freeing his appendage from under her body and raising his now liberated limb high above his head to stretch his muscles.

Watching dumbly as the muscles in his arms flexed and loosened, Hermione suddenly became aware that her legs were entwined with his. With a rather undignified "Eep!", Hermione quickly retracted her legs and launched herself back over to her side of the bed, only to be jarred painfully by the binding handcuffs. Rubbing her injured wrist distractedly, she turned her gaze downwards and fought off a blush.

"Never pegged you as a cuddler, Granger, although I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at you throwing yourself at me subconsciously, what with you doing it awake so often."

"Shut up, Malfoy," Hermione said, more out of habit than anything. Absentmindedly blowing a strand of hair out of her eyes, her brow wrinkled as she scanned the empty room. "Where are all your mates?" She asked, rather perturbed by all the vacant beds.

Raising his eyebrows at her, he languidly pointed to the clock to indicate the late hour. "It's 12:20, Granger, they left for lunch an hour ago."

Gasping fiercely at the late hour, Hermione attempted to launch herself out of the bed, only to make Draco laugh at her when the handcuffs jarred her.

"Come on, get up! I wanted to tell Harry and Ronald about our… our situation before they heard it second-hand! Get up, Malfoy!" She yelled, using his own pillow to whack him into obeying her.

"Calm yourself, Granger," Malfoy said, grabbing the pillow from her, "You could bet your favorite lacy knickers that my mates have already informed the entire northern hemisphere that Hermione 'the chastity-belted' Granger spent the night in my bed."

Groaning loudly at his announcement, she started to yank on the chain connecting them. "Fine then, I'll have to go do damage control!"

Sighing to himself, Draco ran a hand through his hair and shrugged his consent. Sliding off the bed, he dragged Hermione behind him into the bathroom.

"Malfoy, we don't have time for this! A quick refreshing spell and that's it." Hermione declared, yanking the chain between them resolutely.

"Wrong again, Granger, you know those spells don't last well. I am not going to allow this situation to interfere with my meticulous grooming regime. Calm down, you might learn a thing or two." Draco replied, purposefully stripping off his pajama bottoms.

Hermione's hands quickly covered her eyes. "Malfoy… you're making me really uncomfortable."

"Look, Granger, my apologies, but you may as well get used to it. Stand by the edge of the stall, you might want to cast a water repelling charm so you don't get all soggy."

Finding no adequate reason to argue his point and too flustered to debate with the boy, Hermione clumsily followed in his wake, one hand over her eyes and the other performing the spell. Coughing softly against the discomfort of her parched throat, she listened to the sound of the water. Forcing herself not to contemplate the naked body under the stream of the shower, she turned her thoughts to reciting History of Magic dates in her head. By the time she had reached Archimedes, she heard the water shut off. Again covering her eyes with her hand, she bit her lip as she briefly considered cracking her fingers and taking a quick peek. The risk of mortification at being caught retrained her, but it was a close call.

"So, luv, after our gods-willingly short interlude with Tweedledum and Tweedledummer, how shall we fill the long hours of our captivity?" Draco asked as he toweled his hair dry, leaving it sexily tousled. Waiting for her response, he accioed his clothes and began his 'meticulous grooming ritual'.

"Umm… I promised Ginny I would spend some time with her today, but now I'm not sure if I should subject her to you as well. Why spread the torture around, y'know?"

"Wanting to keep me all to yourself, eh? Well, that's understandable."

"Your ability to skew a slur into a flattering remark never fails to amaze me."

"Darling, I never fail to amaze you. Period."

"Shut up, Malfoy."

"Hmmm… This acute lack of witty ripostes on your part is leaving me with a keen sense of disappointment. Never tell me that Weasley's total lack of mental acumen has leaked into your brain through some sort of hither unto unknown type of idiocy osmosis?"

"Ronald is not an idiot! He's— he is… very punctual."

"That's lame, Granger, even for a—"

"A what, Malfoy? A mudblood?"

"Actually, I was going to say for a girl." Draco said, laughing at her. Motioning that he was ready to go, he exited the dorm, pulling her behind him.

"Sexist pig."

"There's the slightly witty response I was waiting for. Pedantic bint."

"Pedantic? Big word for a narrow-minded peer of the realm."

"Finally recognizing my aristocratic supremacy? I am amazed."

"Ahh, and here comes the discriminatory slurs."

"Granger, let it go. Yes, I am your superior, but it has little to do with blood. It's just the natural way of things. You are the pleb to my patrician, the Third Estate to my First, the Neanderthal to my early homosapien."

"Your humility astounds me."

"Don't mention it."


"Good. We're here, ready to greet the jealous stares of every female within sight?" Draco asked smugly.

Resisting the urge to tell him to yet again 'shut up', Hermione straightened her shoulders and walked through the doors to the Great Hall with purpose and poise, at least, until she was greeted with a resounding silence that was deafening. Glaring at the smirking faces of the surrounding faces, she pulled her attached boy baggage towards her table and the gob smacked expressions of her friends, or at least, she tried to.

"Think again, Hot Lips. We're sitting with my friends." Draco said, using his superior strength the redirect her.

"No! I spent the entire night with your 'friends'. No dice. Stop pulling me!" She all but shouted, causing them to halt midway between the tables.

"Granger, you can straighten them out after I eat. I'm starving! See, there was this Gryffindor sprawled out on top of me this morning so I couldn't eat breakfa—"

"Quiet!" Hermione hissed at his, quickly looking around for anyone in hearing distance.

"What? Embarrassed at your subconscious lecherous behavior?"

Before Hermione could choose between slapping him and scowling at him, the voice of her friend interrupted her violent thoughts.

"Hermione, what's going on? Zabini comes down here about an hour ago, spewing shite about you sleeping in the Slytherin dorms last night, then you make your grand entrance with this ponce?"

Turning to face her friend, Hermione smiles nervously. "Hi Harry!" She says a little too enthusiastically. "This isn't what it looks like."

"Yes it is." Malfoy says, smiling at the amusing turn of events. Potter looked livid.

"Stuff it, Malfoy." Harry says, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at Hermione for an explanation.

"Well, see, here's the thing." Hermione said, launching herself into a detailed retelling of her torturous imprisonment and the severe mental agony ensuing from said imprisonment. By the end of her tirade, Harry and Ron (who had stomped over after Harry) were wearing similar expressions of surprise mingled with a healthy amount of anger. Draco seemed non-plussed as he uninterestingly examined his fingernails and exuded an air of superiority.

"Bloody hell, Hermione!" Ron exclaimed, "Headship isn't worth it! Just tell Dumbledore that you'll give it up!"

Hermione glared at her friend, annoyed at how little he seemed to know her. "And let him win?" She demanded, furiously, "Bloody well not! No, I'm going to stick this out, even if it ends with me losing my marbles."

"Right, well, we'll stay with you, then," Harry sadi, eyeing Draco mistrustingly, "T' make sure this ponce doesn't do anything stupid."

"Right, Potter, because I'm the one in this little quartet who is known for his stupidity." Draco said, sarcastically.

"Sod off, Malfoy, " Harry said, more out of habit than anything.

"Boys, just lay off it. I'm not in the mood." Hermione said.

"But, Granger, you're always in the mood." Draco said, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Sod off!" Harry repeated, this time his voice held venom.

Hermione rolled her eyes. This was going to be a bloody long day…


Hey guys, thanks for reading. Now, let's jump right into me asking you for a favor, sheepish smile. I was looking for two stories and I can't for the life of me remember the titles or authors, maybe you guys can help me? They are Lily/James stories.

A) Lily is a prefect and James somehow comes across her prefect badge. I think there is an older woman in it who is a friend to Lily, a self-help book writer or something. I think James somehow gets put in a cage by Lily, or something…

B)Lily and James get detention together and it has something to do with glass balls. I think Lily stuffs some down her shirt to climb up a bookcase but then falls down.

Yes, random, I know, but any help would be appreciated. Please message me if you know either of these titles, and thank you for reading (and perhaps reviewing, non?).