Alright! My first story, and it's gonna be about Christmas, kinda. It involves Santa, at least. And that elf who wanted to be a dentist, just cause I've always wanted him to be a super villain. I loved those Christmas specials… but here goes!
So there was Santa Clause ( E.G. Chris Kringle, Saint Nick, etc.), lying face down in a snow bank, listening to the whir of sounds around him, when suddenly, he realized that none of the readers would know what was going on. So he yelled at me to start from the beginning, so now we have to go back a couple weeks.
It was two weeks before Christmas Eve, and that elf who wanted to be a dentist ( is his name Dennis?) was sleeping under a tree outside Santa's workshop. He was supposed to be helping make toys, since the elves were in a huge rush because they put this off til the last minute. You see, over the summer they contacted their union, and after some legal stuff, cough, cough, they were given the summer season off on paid vacation. Then, when Fall swept in, they were all still lazy and fat, so now here we are, rushing to get things done. Anyway, there's this slacker who wants to be a dentist taking a nap, which obviously means he's in trouble.
"HERMY!", ( the head elf knows his name) " And just what in the north pole are you doing!? This is the last straw! You wanta be a dentist, do you?'
" Yes, sir, it's been my dream since-"
"I DON'T CARE! You can be a dentist, but you know what?"
" No, sir, I-"
" There's no room for 'dentists' in the north pole. You're outta here!!"
And with that, Hermy was expelled from the north pole. And what's worse, it was put on his resume.
And while all this was going on, Santa was busy doing Santa stuff. And when he was done, he took a head count of all the elves, just to make sure none of them had snuck off to Florida again, and he realized the weirdo who wanted to be a dentist wasn't there. After learning what had happened, he decided to go and find the elf before he turned into a super-villain seeking revenge on all the inhabitants of the north pole. And so he set off.
One week later
Hermy had been rejected by every respectable dentist office in Northeastern Pa, which happens to be where he ended up, and he was running out of ideas. At the moment, he is lying face down on the side of the street outside my house, out cold. And so I come to the rescue…
To be continued…
That's not too bad, right? The next one will be more exciting, but I won't give away any of it.