This story is the 2nd in the Vampire Bella Trilogy, picking up one month after Bella's change. Hope you enjoy!
DISCLAIMER: The characters do not belong to me…they are all the creations of the wonderful Stephenie Meyer.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Bella tries to put herself into words.
Introduction
I sat on the edge of my bed staring out of the window. My day was shaping up to be another cold, but clear October day in the Alaskan wilderness. Just perfect for me and my family. I thought briefly about today being exactly one month from the day I woke up. I was glad that no one - by no one I mean Alice - had made a big deal of it. It wasn't that I was having problems with my new life, I just still didn't like being the center of attention.
I was supposed to be doing an exercise for Carlisle. My father decided that he wanted to run some tests with me to see if he could figure out if I had a power and what it might be. He seemed to think it might have something to do with me being able to retain my human memories. I didn't keep all of them, just the ones involving my husband.
Speaking of said husband, if I ever wanted to spend time with him again, I would have to complete my task. Carlisle had asked me to write about myself and my feelings so far. He said I should include what I remember most about my past.
I got up and stacked all of our pillows together and plopped onto the bed, leaning against them. I fixed my laptop across my knees. It was a gift from Edward and Alice – one that I had begrudgingly accepted since I had left my old computer back in Forks. I had wanted something simple. They had gotten me the top of the line, most expensive one they could find. Did I mention that it was blue? Alice made sure nearly everything I owned was blue. I didn't bother complaining because I knew it would do no good with her and because we both knew Edward loved it.
I tapped the keys experimentally, making sure I used the right amount of pressure. I'd only used it a few times so far. It would be really bad for me to break my brand new laptop by using too much force. I was technically only a month old and I still had some kinks to work out. I was reluctant to rest my palms and wrists on the edge, fearing I would leave dents. I gingerly tested myself and was pleased to find I could do it without too much effort.
I sat silently for a while, trying to decide how to start. The deciding had always been the hard part for me when I was human and it had carried over with me. Once the decision was made, everything fell into place. But reaching the decision was sometimes excruciating. Today seemed to be a good day because I immediately decided how I wanted to write my paper. I would pretend that I was introducing myself to someone I didn't know. I flexed my fingers and rested them over the keys. I took a deep breath and started typing away:
Hello. I'm Bella Cullen. Pleased to meet you. You want me to talk about myself? I really don't enjoy that. I prefer to stay out of the spotlight. I have reasons. Many reasons. You still want me to? Okay, but I'm warning you now, there are some quirks that come with knowing me.
I'm married to the most wonderful, caring, loving man and his name is Edward Cullen. I was afraid of the idea of marriage at first, but if you find someone as wonderful as Edward, I highly recommend it. He's been an excellent husband so far. He's sometimes a tad on the protective side, but he has his reasons.
I have two sisters and two brothers that I adore. Alice is the exuberant sister and she loves anything with the words party, dress-up, or gift in it. Rosalie is the definition of physical perfection, but her heart is the truly beautiful part of her. That's not to say that we always get along. We're sisters, we're bound to argue. But I love them very much and we forgive each other. My brothers Emmett and Jasper are both my favorites, but for very different reasons. Emmett is the fun brother and Jasper is the understanding one. My parents, Esme and Carlisle are wonderful, loving people. Esme is the mother everyone wishes they had and Carlisle seems to have infinite patience. That's a good thing in a house with six teenagers! We all live together in one big house and I hope to never have it any other way.
As wonderful as my family is, they are actually my first quirk. In my first family, I was the daughter of Charlie Swan and Renee Dwyer and I was human. I grew up with my mother since my parents had divorced when I was little. When I was a teenager, my mother remarried. I decided it was time to give her some space and live with Charlie for awhile. I really didn't think I would have any fun because I loved Phoenix and Forks was so anti-Phoenix. Moving was the best decision I ever made because it led me to Edward.
When I was human, I wasn't very good at it! I was a real klutz and a danger magnet – not a good mix when you're hanging out with mythical creatures. You see, my current family and I are vampires. Oh! And my best friend is a werewolf. We haven't talked to each other in a while and he might never talk to me again. Werewolves and vampires are mortal enemies and Jake doesn't think friendship can overcome instinct. I'm hoping he's wrong and that one day, he'll be able to be friends with me and my family.
I'm not really good at being a vampire either to tell you the truth. Don't get me wrong! I am an absolute vegetarian! No control problems so far! It's just that I lack certain abilities that regular newborns have. I've only been strong enough to beat Emmett in arm-wrestling once so far. And I'm probably the first newborn in history to get grounded for being scared by a bear.
Another quirk of mine is that I could smell blood when I was human and it made me sick. Now that I'm a vampire, it still smells awful, but I can handle it without being sick. I just don't hunt often like a normal newborn would. Emmett's secretly been calling me 'Picky Eater' as a joke. We both think it might be a little early to let Edward know. He's a little overprotective since I'm so new. He still thinks of me as being breakable. I think it's sort of sweet and romantic.
Sometimes, when Edward looks at me, I get the feeling that he's still waiting for me to run screaming, for me to regret my choices. He can be a very silly vampire. I try to reassure him through my words and actions that I love him and I'm happy. But Edward is used to being able to hear thoughts and to know the absolute truth behind spoken words. I have a quirk with my brain and it keeps him out of it – he can't hear a single thing from me. My mind is closed tight and that's come in handy for me a time or two. Edward thinks I edit too much. But it's only been a month and I'm sure he'll get better with time.
A happy result of my quirks is that I have all of my human memories. Well, all of the ones that count most. My very first one is of sitting at a table and my eye being caught by a mess of untidy red-bronze hair, belonging to none other than my wonderful husband. I think of my mind as being full of pictures, little snapshots that represent pieces of my memory. The pictures are in chronological order (I think) and sit in boxes.
Sometimes, when I open up a box, it seems like some of the pictures are missing. I have a theory about that. I think that any memories not directly related to Edward in someway have faded. Take my best friend Jake for example. I can clearly remember learning to ride my motorcycle with him and hearing Edward yell at me in my head. But one picture has me wearing a black shirt and blue jeans as I ride and the next has me in a green sweater and a darker pair of jeans. Something went on between my rides with Jake, but I don't know what.
I was surprised to find that Renee was a little hard to remember, except for one trip to Jacksonville. Edward sometimes has to remind me what she's like. I only know that she and Charlie were very angry about the engagement and didn't come to the wedding. I sent them letters before we came here, but I don't think they're going to write back.
I can also remember my friends Angela and Ben. I can remember Mike Newton and Jessica Stanley and some of my teachers. There was a girl that Jessica was friends with and I can see her face sometimes, but I don't really remember her. I don't think she was friends with me. I've already mentioned Jake and I do remember the entire wolf pack, especially Embry and Quill.
There are some darker things that I remember as well, but I try not to think about them. One day, I'll have to face them again whether I want to or not. It's better to leave them alone for now and just focus on enjoying life. I'm just glad that two of them will never be able to bother me again, all thanks to my husband and my wonderful family. They look out for me.
It was nice to meet you, but I really must be going. My sister is anxiously waiting to give me a make-over. She takes great pleasure from my torture, but it's only because she loves me so very much. If I could give you only one piece of advice, it would be this: Life is not fair and hardly ever turns out like you expected. Just know that sometimes, it turns out better.
I clicked the save button and put the laptop aside. I got up and stretched out my arms and legs. I quickly gathered up my laptop and took it to my father. I didn't want to tempt myself with the option to edit. Carlisle had specifically asked me to write whatever came to mind.
He smiled at me as I entered his study. "All done?"
"Yep," I said, putting the laptop on his desk. "Not a dent on it either!" I proudly added.
Carlisle chuckled, "Good. Why don't you go find the rest of the family and enjoy your afternoon?"
I kissed his cheek lightly. "Thanks, Dad."
"You're welcome, Bella," he replied.
I closed his study door and leaned back against it. Yes, I certainly was one lucky girl; a loving husband, a mother and father, two great sisters and two wonderfully obnoxious big brothers. I was rich by even vampire standards!