Naruto sat on the edge of the hospital bed, completely concealed by the blanket. It'd been ten minutes since he'd gotten there and his sobs had finally subsided by the time Tsunade walked, "What is it now, brat? I have SICK people to attend to, and if there's nothing wrong with you so help me I'll bop you one."
Naruto poked his muzzle out from underneath the blanket, "I've got a little problem." She rolled her eyes, and he glared, "I'm... Stuck."
"I'm gonna regret this... Stuck in what, pray tell?"
She groaned and reached for the sheet, "Alright lets have a look."
"Uh uh!" He pulled it tightly down over his head.
She yanked at it once, hard, "Oh please how bad could it-" But she stopped surprised. Wear Naruto should have been a pretty blond girl sat in his clothes... And with his eyes... And whisker like marks... "Oh... my." Then she let out a long high pitched cackle.
"I told you. I was trying to get pervy sage's attention and I didn't change back. I was almost raped and all you can say is 'oh my'." He said turning bright red with both anger and embarrassment.
"Well, all I can say is wait until it wears off." And then she went to leave.
Naruto jumped up, "Come on! There's gotta be something you can do! Some kind of prescription you can fill."
"Fine, here it is; baggy clothes and duck tape." She studied him a moment and grinned, "LOTS of duck tape. Or maybe get some girl clothes and a new name. Here, I got one! Megami! Or Miyu! Yeah!" And with one last maniacal laugh she was gone.
Naruto was wrapped in a baggy hoodie with his long hair tucked in the hood, as he trudged down the street. He could only think of one person who could help him. Knocking on the door he waited until it opened, revealing his kunoichi teammate. She blinked, "What's with the hood?"
"I have a little problem."
She rolled her eyes and he glared. Why was it everyone got irritated when he said that? Moving aside she let him in, "Come on, and I'll make some tea." Ordinarily she wouldn't have done this but he seemed sincerely troubled and not just scheming for a date. When she was done with the tea she sat at the table with him and sipped her tea. Setting it down she studied him, "So, what's so serious you need my help?" Naruto pulled the hoodie over his head releasing a plume of blonde hair and a chest that made her look undeveloped. She blinked, then growled, "Idiot, I should've known you-"
"Wait, Sakura! I can't change back!"
She blinked, "Oh my..." He rolled his eyes, sometimes she was to like Grandma Tsunade. At least, she was kind enough not to burst out laughing. "I thought your voice sounded funny. Oh well, you'll just have to be a girl for a while."
"But I can't. I don't know HOW to be a girl! What will the guys SAY?"
"Probably that you're a fine piece of real estate and they'll grab your ass."
"I know. Such pervs. Or maybe they'll ignore it because your clothes are..." She cringed.
"What's wrong with my clothes?"
"They aren't exactly flattering. I mean you might as well hang a sign that says 'Wide Load' on your back."
Naruto blushed furiously, "Really?"
"Yup. I mean the jacket's alright but the pants... WAY to much orange."
"I like orange."
"Alright time to take you upstairs."
Naruto blinked, "For what?" But she just grabbed his new girly wrist and dragged him up to her room. Once there she dug in the back of her closet, throwing articles of clothing over her shoulder.
"Ah ha!" she exclaimed, holding up a pair of jean shorts to the heaven's in triumph, "I was saving these for when I finally got an ass but... Oh well, here." She tossed them to Naruto, followed by a black belly shirt. "Bathroom's across the hall." He walked over and closed the door pulling off his orange pants, and pulling on the jeans over his boxers. He looked in the mirror and winced. There was a knock on the door and he opened it a crack to have a set of pink lingerie stuffed in. They still had the tags on and were, in the part of him that was still male's opinion, pretty sexy.
"Why do you-?"
"I was hoping to have a bigger chest by now alright!?!?" Then she slammed the door shut.
He successfully switched from the boxers to panties but the bra on the other hand was a challenge. When he finally got it on it nearly cut off his circulation. He grabbed his orange jacket and walked back to her room, "These things are torture. Why do you people wear these thing?"
"They make your chest look bigger."
"Why would you want them bigger, I mean I'm gonna throw out my back because of these things." He plopped down on the bed.
"Be thankful, most girls would kill for boobs like those." She waited and when the laughter didn't come she looked over at him, alarmed. He was simply staring at the ceiling. "You okay Naruto?"
"Other than the fact I am a girl?"
"I mean, are you feeling okay? You're not your usual hyperactive, knuckle headed self."
"I'm fine." Naruto said insistently.
"If you say so."
"I do! Gosh you are so annoying..." But as he said it he realized he was different. Sakura was unappealing. "Oh my gosh, I'm thinking like a girl!", he screeched.
Sakura's eyebrows shot up, "Really?"
"Yes, I must be!"
"How would you know your thinking like a girl?"
"Um..." He paused, "I don't know. I'm suddenly prone to crying and bursts of self-consciousness."
"Yeah, that'll do it." She giggled, "And with the summer festival in a couple days too."
"Oh dear..." He had been planning on asking Sakura. Now that wasn't just impossible. He honestly didn't want to. "Ah well, there's always next year." He got up and stretched, "I'm gonna go lock myself in my room until this thing wears off. See ya later." He went to leave.
"Can't do that Naruto."
He stopped, "And why not?"
"We have a mission tomorrow."
"What!?!" He turned red. "I can't let Sasuke see me like this! I can't let anyone else see me like this!"
"Calm down. It's not that bad. Just don't make a big deal out of it and they won't either."
Naruto blushed scarlet as he and Sakura walked to where they were to meet Kakashi. People stared as he walked by and it made him want to hide in a hole somewhere, "I thought you said they wouldn't make a big deal."
"Oh they'll get over it." She said waving it off. They walked by the flower shop when he heard something that made him wince.
"Ino!" Sakura turned in alarm.
"Who's your friend?" Naruto winced.
"It's... Naruto." Naruto winced again.
"Naruto?! What have you done to yourself?" she said laughing hysterically.
"It's not funny!" He whined.
"You even sound like a girl! This is just to rich!" Just then Sasuke turned on their street. He caught sight of Naruto and stared. Sakura saw him first and waved, breaking his stare but he still threw him frequent glances. Naruto, after seeing Sasuke, suddenly became preoccupied with his shoes. Ino stopped laughing to grin at Sasuke. "Hey, Sasuke-kun! I'm sorry you're on a team with such losers. They're even worse than mine!" Then she laughed all the way into the shop.
"Naruto?" He enquired. Naruto looked up at him.
Naruto turned bright red, "Yeah, I know, I'm a girl. Trust me it isn't the greatest scenario for me either."
"You are so useless." and then he walked right by them. After a few feet, Sasuke stopped, and looked back inquiringly at Naruto as if he expected some kind of explosion of insults and got not so much as a curse. The blond started to shake uncontrollably then turned his blue eyes toward him, leaving the Uchiha speechless; they were overflowing with tears. Naruto let out a few hiccups before running off. Sasuke was stunned.
Sakura gaped at him, "How could you!?!?"
"It's not like I haven't called him useless before!"
"You should be more sensitive to the feelings of others! Hmph!" And then she turned and stomped off after their teammate, leaving a bewildered Sasuke standing in the street.
He folded his arms, "Stupid Naruto. Since when is he such a cry baby?" Despite that he couldn't help but feel guilty. He knew it was Naruto's own fault and that the idiot would have to deal with it but... Those melancholy blue eyes made him regret he'd ever opened his big mouth. He grunted and stopped at the bridge where they usually met Kakashi and, as usual, he was not there. Stupid Kakashi, stupid Naruto, he sighed and kicked a small pebble, Stupid, stupid me. Then he stopped. Since when was HE, legacy of the Uchiha's, stupid. Since I started hanging out with that loser, he thought bitterly. That was the moment Kakashi decided to show up. He stopped in his tracks when he saw only Sasuke standing there and looked around.
"The time I'm only a few minutes late is the time they decide not to show." He turned to Sasuke, "Where are the others?"
"I made Naruto cry and the baka ran off." He pointed down the street, "Sakura went after him- or maybe I should say her."
"Now it's not nice and very sexist to call Naruto a girl simply because he cried."
"That's not why I said her."
"Because he's a pussy isn't a good reason either-"
"What about if he had boobs and a pussy? Would that count?" Kakashi went silent, "When I ran into him he had all the qualifications of GIRL." Still he said nothing. "So, we might as well get on with the mission-"
Kakashi started off in the direction Sasuke had pointed in early, "I say we go find your teammates-"
"You just wanna see the jutsu, perv."
Kakashi stopped, "No, no, no! You got me all wrong. I am deeply concerned for her-him... Naruto." He grabbed Sasuke by the collar and yanked him down the street. "And I'm gonna make you apologize to... Him for those hurtful things I imagine you said." Sasuke struggled then gave up.
"This is so stupid."