Title: Wishful Thinking
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing(s): One-sided Colin/Harry.
Genre/Rating: Angst, Romance/M
Word Count: 404
Summary: It never felt quite real: knowing the legendary Harry Potter. Colin Creevey sometimes wondered if he'd wake up from the most beautiful lie his mind had ever created.
Warnings: This story contains references to wet dreams and sexual situations. Nothing explicit, but it's there.
Notes: This actually bears a scary resemblance to how I picture Ginny's feelings for Harry. Except without the creepy-hormonal-boy-fantasies. And that Ginny married him. But she had the unfair advantage of being a cute redhead. Poor Colin.
Colin Creevey, contrary to popular opinion, was not an idiot. He knew, with a painful clarity, that Harry Potter would never – could never – return even a fraction of what he felt. But that didn't stop him.
The increasingly grudging replies when Colin called, "All right, Harry?" still made him feel as tingly and special as the first. He liked to imagine it was simply life and a terrible duty that weighed down the elder boy's spirit, rather than an actual growth in irritation. Sometimes he even liked to picture that Harry might one day come to him, let Colin thread his fingers through unruly black locks, and free every worry and hurt that prevented him being the carefree teen he deserved to be. And sometimes he pictured more.
In the first few years at Hogwarts, his dreams of Harry contained only friendship. They'd sit together on Harry's bed, talking late into the night while Ron Weasley stayed jealously silent. But that all changed after he turned fourteen.
It was almost halfway through fourth year when it first happened. Colin drifted off and there they were again. Colin was complimenting Harry fervently on his Quidditch prowess and then, unexpectedly, Harry leant over and kissed him!
Colin was so surprised he woke up. He didn't sleep again that night, staring straight at the ceiling for hours on end and realising with a dull sort of terror that he liked it. That he could even want more than that.
He couldn't look at Harry without seeing it for a week. And slowly, without his even comprehending what was happening to his own body, his own mind, the singular chaste kiss evolved into a full-fledged fantasy.
And Colin found another reason to be ridiculously pleased to be a wizard. He didn't think he could have borne the humiliation of someone discovering his dirty little secret.
Maybe if Harry was not what all the books said, if he wasn't brave and strong and handsome, it would have been easier to let go. But he was perfect. Utterly perfect.
So Colin watched as the boy who was, ultimately, his hero, struggle through a thousand different tests to his courage, his determination, and his heart. He sat back and watched as he passed every one, regardless of how long it took. Watched him suffer and soar, win and lose. And wished that he'd ever had a chance.
But he never did.