A/N: I am warning my readers now, this is a VERY mature one-shot! If you complain about it being to graphic then go somewhere else. I cleaned it up A LOT which was a great disappointment for me, so be appreciative and don't make a fuss. Also, I use Japanese a number of times, for those who don't know, "tenchou" means "manager, "Ohayou" is a greeting for "Good morning" and we all know what "hai" means. I took quite a bit of creative license with this so if you say that I'm doing something not a part of the Bleach storyline, I WILL IGNORE YOU BECAUSE I DON'T CARE. -ahem- Please enjoy and review if you like it, I'm planning to do more.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Bleach or any of the characters, I just force them into fun situations :D

Sexy Candy

It was a rather balmy day in Karakura, the sun bright and warm with a light breeze now and then, making it a generally cheery atmosphere. It was a mood that infected every resident all over the town, including the tenants of the mysterious Urahara Shop.

The front door slid open with a clack, the shop's disheveled manager stepping outside to stretch and breathe in some of the clear air. On most mornings he had a degree of tidiness to him, but this morning he looked more sleep-deprived than usual. His eyes scanned the outside of the shop for his other tenants, the two youngest usually out front cleaning and yelling, but the two children were nowhere in sight. He retreated back into the shade of the shop, and then spotted his fellow co-worker, near the back of the shop boiling tea.

"Ohayou, Tessai." He yawned, walking toward the large man slowly, his sandals clacking and scraping against the floor. Tessai lifted the small pot and poured several cups of steaming tea.

"Ohayou, Urahara-tenchou. You don't look well. Bad sleep?" He asked. Kisuke sighed, plopping down on the floor opposite Tessai. He sipped the hot tea slowly.

"Ah, I've been working on a project for the past few days and I haven't been able to finish it. Last night I decided I wouldn't sleep until it was finished. Needless to say, Yoruichi-san wasn't pleased I decided this." He explained, taking another sip of tea.

"Hmm, I see. Well I would have to side with Yoruichi-san on this matter, it is unhealthy to forego sleep for a project." He answered strictly, crossing his arms. Kisuke grinned.

"Oh, that's not why she was upset." He smirked. Tessai was confused for a moment, and then looked away quickly to hide his blush.

"Ahem, I see…" He cleared his throat. Kisuke looked around the shop again.

"Where are Jinta and Ururu? They're usually out front and I didn't see them."

"I sent them out for groceries. We're starting to run out of milk faster now that Yoruichi-san is back with us." He explained.

"Ah, of course." Kisuke smirked.

"Now, what exactly is this project of yours? Nothing dangerous is it?" He asked curiously. Kisuke flipped his fan open, hiding his wide grin.

"Heh heh, well, I haven't been able to test it yet, but it's a very unique candy that I'm planning to start selling…"


A small groan sounded in the guestroom, the fifth tenant of the shop finally waking. Yoruichi sat up slowly, popping her neck and back, then stretching out her legs slowly. She stood and arched her back, her nude skin glowing in the morning light. A yawn escaped her and she rubbed her eyes.

Better check on Kisuke…I doubt he slept last night… She decided, pulling on a robe. She slid open the door and started down the hall to his room. In case he had fallen asleep, she opened the door quietly, peeking her head inside.

"Kisuke…?" She asked softly, looking for his sleeping body. He was nowhere to be found. She opened the door completely, walking into his room to snoop around and see exactly what he had been working on. There was nothing suspicious in sight and she felt a twinge of disappointment. Then she noticed a small bowl of candy on a table.

"Well, for my disappointment, I'm taking his candy." She decided, taking one of the small round candies. She popped the small red ball in her mouth, sucking on it. It was very sweet with just a hint of tart flavor. She took another and popped it in her mouth too, crunching it with her teeth and savoring the addictive flavor. Suddenly, her body shook uncontrollably and she fell to her knees. A gasp escaped her as a sudden wave of heat rippled over her skin. She fell over, writhing on the ground, but not in agony. There was only one thought in her head as she struggled with whatever was putting her body in such a state.

K-Kisuke…help me…


"And that's why I need a guinea pig!" Kisuke finished explaining, snapping his fan shut. Tessai looked horrified.

"We can't sell something like that!" He argued in disbelief. Kisuke shrugged his shoulders.

"Heh, you never know who might be willing to buy something that can put a spark in their love life. It hasn't been tested yet and I have a feeling that I still need to work out a few kinks before I can even think of marketing it, so you can rest your head Tessai." He stood up, turning to leave.

"Anyway, I should put it all away for now, don't want any children to get into it." He left Tessai to his tea and started to his room. A noise pricked his ears and he walked faster to his room. He slid open the door and for a moment simply stared.

"K-Kisuke…something's…wrong with me…ahhhhnnn…" Yoruichi moaned. Kisuke could not help but grin at the sight of his lover. Her robe had fallen off and she was pleasuring herself furiously.

"Oh my Yoruichi-san, did the curious kitty in you go snooping through my room and find something? Hm?" He teased. She blushed redder than she already was.

"G-gomen…ahh…" She panted, unable to stop touching herself.

"Aww, poor Yoruichi-san. Did you eat that candy over there? You shouldn't have. Now you're going to be a horny little kitten for a few hours." He explained. She made a strangled cry then moaned again. He smiled and stepped out of the room.

"Tessai! Do me a favor please!" He yelled down the hall.

"Hai tenchou!" The deep voice answered.

"Yoruichi-san isn't feeling very well, could you go out and buy her some ice and fever medicine?"

"Hai tenchou!" A loud clack signaled his departure. Kisuke stepped back into the room and closed the door, looking down at his unfortunate tenant.

"Now, now, what should I do with my oh-so-horny Yoruichi?"

She looked up at him, her eyes dazed and drunk with need. He chuckled a bit.

"You look very…appetizing right now, Yoruichi." He smiled, sliding off his haori, dropping it near the door. He pulled off his hat, dropping it on the haori, and then moved to his knees. She continued moaning and writhing. Grinning, he decided to see just how far he could tease her before she lost what senses she had left. Pulling out his fan, he tapped one of her nipples to observe her response. She let out a loud cry, the sensation so intense it sent her back arching.

"My, my, Yoruichi, I had no idea my creation was that effective. Just how much did you eat, hm?" He asked, continuing to press her erect nipple. A shiver broke over her as she tried to form coherent sentences.

"J-just two…and then…ahhh…euphoria…that's all I…could feel…Kisuke, I can't…stop touching myself…" She whimpered, tears of pleasure gathering at the corners of her eyes.

"Do you want me to make all the horrible desire better? Hm?" He asked playfully, moving his fan away and using his index finger to rub her nipple instead. She nearly screamed a yes. A sly grin curved over his lips.

"Then if my sweet Yoruichi demands pleasure, then I simply must please her!" He exclaimed, sliding out of his robe, but leaving his pants intact.

His hands roamed up her hot skin, feeling her instant response. A moan rasped out of her throat, the heat in her growing twice as fierce than it had been before. His mouth descended down on a nipple, licking slowly then sucking it into his mouth, his free hand squeezing her other breast. A cry burst out of her from the pleasure. She felt him grin against her skin, his hand squeezing harder. His free hand moved lower to find out just how wet his candy had made her. Sliding past her already busy fingers, he traced the opening of her womanhood, feeling the slickness of it. His lips tightened around her nipple, tugging it until she was mewling from the sensation. His hand slid away from her weeping slit, sliding down her thigh to spread her legs apart. Her fingers managed to cease their wild rubbing long enough to roam over his skin and find the defined bulge of his shaft, still trapped in his pants. Cupping a hand, she rubbing him slowly, then harder, feeling the throb of his pulse. His lips pulled away from her breast with a gasp, feeling her rub him harder.

"Ah, moving quick aren't you?" He groaned, his breath growing heavier. She moaned and slid her hand away, her fingers trickling up his back and through his hair.

"I don't think you understand Kisuke…I need sex now…" She said huskily, arching her back and pushing her hips against his. He closed his eyes in bliss, moving his hands down her sides to grip her hips and grind against her.

"Oh god yes…that feels so good…" He groaned, his voice thick with pleasure.

"Mmm…you're nice and hard Kisuke…" She purred, her eyes dazed and watching him. Her grinding eventually pushed him over the edge, his head growing hazy, making him push her hips away for only a moment to slide his pants down enough to expose his throbbing shaft. She grinned and made a small mewing noise. For a number of reasons, he found that horribly arousing. He moved to his knees and lifted her hips up close to him.

"Oh my, do I have a naughty kitty on my hands?" He teased, rubbing the long vein of his shaft against her leaking slit. A ragged moan forced it's way out of her and she panted heavily.

"Ahhh…y-yes…ohhh…" Her toes curled as he teased her moments longer.

"Let's see just how warm it is in you…" He grinned, shoving his shaft inside her. She threw her head back with a wild scream, her body trembling madly.

"Oh my, I just put it in and you're already wetter? Guess you really want it, huh Yoruichi?" He chuckled, pumping in her slowly for several moments. A low cry escaped her at each deep thrust. She arched her back, sitting up on her elbows to watch him thrust in and out of her.

"Ahn! Harder! Oh god, Kisuke! Harder!" She cried her face flushed from pleasure. A knowing smile was on his face, his hands digging into her hips as he pounded in and out of her warmth, his cool eyes watching her body react. His eyes watched her face contort in bliss when he changed pace or pushed deeper, then roamed down to watch her breasts bounce from her heavy gasps and his thrusts, and finally to the act itself, watching as he penetrated her faster, her opening responding by leaking copious amounts of fluid.

"You look…beautiful…Yoruichi…" He murmured between breaths. She was so warm inside; so warm, moist, and tight. An orgasm was threatening to overtake her, but she was nowhere near ready to stop.

"M-more! More Kisuke! Ahh!" She begged. He complied, sliding out of her, and rolling her on her stomach.

"Of course Yoruichi…I'll please you however you wish…" He answered, lifting her hips and shoving himself back inside, his furious pounding beginning again. She cried out in bliss, spreading her legs wider as he ran a hand up her body to squeeze one of her bouncing breasts.

"Ahn! Yes! More! More!" She screamed, throwing her head back as he pounded in her. He let out several rough gasps, feeling her tightening from an approaching orgasm, his shaft being squeezed mercilessly. The pleasure was nearly enough to send him over the edge.

"J-just a bit more…ahh, god yes…!" He breathed, sweat running down his temples, his eyes growing dazed as he watched her nude body. Suddenly, she pulled away from him, surprising him. She spun around and shoved him down onto his back, practically leaping onto him.

"Y-Yoruichi! What are you—oh god yes!" He gasped as she buried him back inside her tight warmth. His head fell back in dazed bliss, his breath becoming ragged as she bounced her hips on him with abandon. Her hands snaked up his chest and through his hair, sending chills through his already over sensitive skin. She leaned forward and crushed her lips against his, forcing her tongue into his mouth. Her tongue stroked against his mindlessly. She started to pull away but his hands gripped the back of her head, tangling in her hair, his tongue rubbing and tasting hers, neither caring as saliva slid down their lips. Pulling her mouth away, leaving him rather satisfied with such an erotic kiss, she arched her back and continued pounding her hips against his. One of his hands gripped her hip, the other sliding down her belly to rub her to orgasm.

"Go on…come Yoruichi…ahhh! Oh god yes…!" He hissed between breaths. She threw her head back with a wild scream, her body reaching the pinnacle of pleasure. Warm juices trickled down his shaft as her body tightened from her intense climax, sending him over the edge with a strained gasp and moan. She rode on the wave of absolute rapture until dizziness made her body fall hard against his. The mindless climax had his head spinning, his body engulfed in bliss. For several moments, neither could form any words, heavy breathing being the only means of communication. He ran a hand through her sweaty hair, and then kissed the top of her head.

"Hah…oh my…Yoruichi…I had no idea…ahh…my precious kitty wanted…her milk so badly…" He wheezed, a drunken grin on his face. She grinned up at him, a deviant spark in her eyes.

"Oh that's not all I want…" She moved her body up, continuing to straddle him, "I never said I was done…"

His eyes widened.

"Wha? Right this second?" He asked incredulously.

"What's wrong? You can keep going can't you?" She asked with a playful smile.

"I can, it's just—" He started.

"Then that's all I need to hear!" She exclaimed, her hands moving down his body.

"Ah! No! Yoruichi! Stop! Eek!" He yelped, unable to fend off her rampant sexual appetite.


The door to Kisuke's room finally slid open, rather slowly. His body was hunched over as he hobbled down the hallway. Tessai was sitting at the back of the shop, again, making more tea. With several groans of pain, he managed to sit opposite his co-worker. For the longest time, silence hung between the two.

"So…how is Yoruichi-san's "fever"?" Tessai asked, breaking the awkward silence.

Kisuke let out a worried laugh.

"I have several bugs to work out of the stuff before I can sell it with a minimal chance of getting sued. I'm lucky I can stillwalk." He explained nervously.

"And you still want to sell your "candy"?" Tessai asked again.

"Of course, I have a feeling I'd get a good deal of money off it."

"And how is Yoruichi-san feeling?"

"My god, she finally passed out after a sixth round." He shivered.

"You do know Jinta and Ururu came back an hour ago?" Tessai warned. Kisuke looked a tad bothered by that.

"And I trust you took care of that?" He asked carefully. Tessai nodded.

"I told them that we'd need more ice. I have a feeling I was right." He remarked. Kisuke sighed.

"Ahh, well that's fine then."

The large man handed the tousled manager a bag of ice. Confused, Kisuke looked at him.

"Huh? What's this for?"

"The bag you sent me out for melted before you finished with Yoruichi-san. I figured you might want one after you were done, judging from some of the noises I heard." Tessai explained, sipping his tea. Kisuke sighed again, standing up slowly.

"I appreciate the thought." He muttered leaving his co-worker, but taking the ice with him, pressing it against his aching groin.

"Anytime." The man answered, pouring himself another cup of tea.


A/N: Was that fun? I hope so, I had so much fun writing it. -squee-