Hey everybody! It's after midnight where I live, and I'm bored. So I'm just writing the first things that come into my head. It's…an experiment of sorts. So here's one of the most random pieces of crap you'll ever read. Enjoy!
Tobi's Really Random Day That Was Also Good!
By Viewtiful Aryll.
Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine. Nor is Bleach, Death Note or One Piece, which I may or may not make a reference to while randomly typing this fic. Heck, I don't really own anything I mention in this fic.
It was a dark and stormy night. But the next day was very sunny and bright, and all the rain dried up before Tobi even woke up. As he awoke, he threw open his curtains and looked out. Unfortunately, all he saw was a Starbucks.
"Wow, they really are everywhere!" Tobi exclaimed. He then happily skipped over to his most favorite person, Deidara-sempai's bed. "WAKE UP, SLEEPY HEAD!" Tobi shouted.
"Shut up Tobi, yeah," Deidara-sempai grumbled. Of course, Tobi would have none of that. So, Tobi threw a bucket of water on Deidara. It woke him up quickly.
"Yay! Tobi is a good alarm clock!" Tobi merrily stated. Deidara-sempai just growled and threw Tobi out of the room. "You're welcome!" Tobi called through the locked door before skipping merrily on his way.
In the dinning room of Akatsuki Headquarters, Tobi poured himself a bowl of his favorite cereal, Kenpachi Zaraki-Os! Every box contained a toy eyepatch! Of course, when Tobi put on his toy eyepatch, he couldn't see and ended up crashing into several walls before he took it off.
"That was fun," Tobi said. "Tobi loves the walls!" He added as he hugged the closest wall. Kisame chose this exact moment to walk in.
"Hey Tobi! You better not be eating all of my Kenpachi Zaraki-Os again," Kisame said as he walked in. He saw Tobi hugging the wall, and just shrugged before he saw the prize he sought out. "Ooh! An eye patch! Now I'll look like a pirate!" Kisame said as he picked up the eye patch.
This of course caused Itachi to appear out of nowhere and say, "Dude, you're a ninja. Ninjas are better than pirates." He then proceeded to slap Kisame, attach a leash to him, and drag him to the other room. Tobi saw none of this, because he was busy still hugging the wall.
After he had finished hugging the wall, Tobi decided to go out for a stroll. He was walking merely on his way when Franky from One Piece came out of nowhere. The two of them danced just because they felt like it, then went on their way. Tobi then walked some more when he ran into a tree.
"Hey! That tree just jumped into Tobi's path! That wasn't very nice! You could have hurt poor Tobi! Watch where you're going next time, tree!" Tobi said as he continued on his way, eventually reaching Konoha.
Tobi wandered the streets of Konoha, taking in the sights, and buying lots of cool things. He even bought some cake, despite all that graffiti he saw on the wall proclaiming the cake to be a lie. Of course, you can't eat cake without eating lunch first, so he headed to McDonald's. Once inside, he found Suigetsu waiting inside at the cash register.
"Welcome to McDonald's. What the fuck do you want?" Suigetsu said.
Tobi happily replied, "One Good Boy Meal! Because Tobi is a good boy!"
Suigetsu shrugged and yelled into the back, "One fucking Good Boy Meal!" He then turned around and said to Tobi, "Ok asshole, that'll be 6 fucking dollars, or whatever the hell the money you guys use around here is called. The authoress is too fucking lazy to look it up." The sound of a wall breaking was heard.
"Ok!" Tobi said as he pulled out lots and lots of money and gave it to Suigetsu, who pocketed half of it, and then put the rest in the cash register before giving Tobi his change. At that time, Tobi's Good Boy Meal was done, so he took it over to the really cool train they had that you could sit on.
"Mommy, Mommy! There's a guy in an orange mask with a weird cloak sitting on the train!" a little boy cried.
"Don't look directly at him! He's special!" the mother replied as she pulled her child away.
After lunch, Tobi went for another stroll. He once again bumped into Franky, so they danced again. Tobi liked to dance. After doing this, Tobi ate his cake and continued his walk. He eventually bumped into Sai.
"Why, hello kid with the belly exposing shirt! Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi said.
"I bet you have a good penis." Sai said. This scared Tobi, so he ran away.
"That was close…." Tobi said. He then realized he had no clue where he was. "Oh no! Tobi is lost!" Tobi cried.
"I'll help you find your way!" someone cried out! This someone turned out to be Mizuki.
"Tobi will pass. Nobody likes you Mizuki." Tobi said.
"It's true!" Mizuki said. And then he cried.
Eventually, Tobi made his way back to the Akatsuki layer, where he saw Itachi eating some potato chips.
"Aha! I've caught you Itachi! Or should I say…. KIRA!" Tobi shouted.
Itachi gasped. "How did you figure out that I secretly used a Death Note to kill my entire clan except for my emo little brother whose name I can't remember?"
Tobi grinned, which couldn't be seen underneath his mask. "I didn't. I just randomly accused you of being Kira. I do that to random people at random times all the time…. because I know that if I do it enough, I'll eventually catch the real Kira! Thanks for the confession…. Kira!" Tobi said as he approached Itachi.
Suddenly, Itachi pulled out a knife and killed himself. As he died, he said. "You…win L. You win,"
Suddenly, Itachi was sitting there, eating chips and staring at Tobi. "Tobi, did you just have the daydream where I'm Kira and you're L again?" he said.
Tobi nodded and said, "Yes, only in the end we find out that you weren't the real Kira, but Choji was. He just used his Death Note to make you confess to being Kira and then killing youself with a kunai to throw us off guard. It's why he's always eating potato chips! Tobi figured it all out!"
Itachi just sighed and said, "Idiot." He picked up his chips and walked away.
Tobi just shrugged, and spent the rest of the night practicing his dance moves so he would have something to do with Franky tomorrow. He then went to bed.
THE END! IT'S OVER!!!!!!!!!
Wow…that sucked. But it was fun. Go ahead and leave a review. Flames won't matter, because I realize this sucks. I wrote this out of sheer boredom.