Title: Yet Another Christmas Invasion
Author: Lady Yueh
Fandom: Doctor Who/Stargate SG-1
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not my property and no infringement is intended.
Character(s): Rose Tyler, Mickey Smith, Jake Simmons, Cameron Mitchell, Daniel Jackson, Teal'c
Author's Notes: For my Advent Calender I give you a crossover in which Rose kicks ass.
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"It's Christmas! How is it fair that they're trying to invade on Christmas!" Lt. Col. Cameron Mitchell was a single octave away from whining, he walked a very fine line.

"I doubt aliens have Christmas," Dr. Daniel Jackson commented.

Their banter was mainly to try and diffuse the complete "oh shit" quality of their situation. General Landry, their leader, was out of commission and even more worrying, Col. Samantha Carter, the brainiest genius since...well ever was stuck inside a lab under some kind of alien influence that, presumably, was making her try to reach a suitable height and stand at the edge in a fairly disquieting manner.

Daniel was making virtually no headway with the alien language (he was brilliant beyond belief but a half-hour wasn't exactly an adequate amount of time), Dr. Lee was no Samantha Carter, and approximately one third of their population (except in Argentina where it was more like one half) was perched precariously on some roof or elevated spot, looking ready to take the plunge.

They would have just blown the damned ship to hell except that there was no guarantee that the people would be safe. And the Asgard weren't much help either, their reputation as protectors was pretty much shot and all their previously "protected" planets were fair game to any asshole in the galaxy.

So now Earth was under attack and the male portion of SG-1 was suiting up for a foray on the enemy ship.

"Beam us up, Scotty," Mitchell called jauntily to the Fortuna, the Daedalus-class battle cruiser currently in orbit, ready for the order to engage the enemy.

"We do not appreciate the inaccurate attempt at humor, Colonel," the one of the Asgard, either Freki or Geri (he could never tell) chided.

"Sorry," he muttered.

"See that it does not happen again," the one had to be Geri (he was usually the grumpier one) reprimanded before initializing the beaming tech.


"Remind me to be really angry at those guys," Mitchell commented as he held up his arms in surrender.

They'd been beamed right in the middle of what seemed to be a god-damned stadium!

"Indeed," Teal'c intoned.

"Man, they are ugly."

"Indeed."

"What are they saying, Jackson?"

"Didn't exactly get very far with the translation," Daniel hissed through a fake smile.

The very alien aliens were making blatant threatening gestures.

"Americans! You're all bloody useless!"

SG-1 exchanged quick glances before finding the source of the comment.

The young, blonde woman was sauntering through the ranks, seemingly unconcerned, as she approached one of the aliens.

"Sycorax! I am Rose Tyler, a Defender of this planet! You are direct violation of Convention 15 of the Shadow Proclamation and I demand you release the people below and withdraw at once!"

"Okay, first: how did you get up here? Second: why are you talking to them in English?" Daniel commented.

The woman, Rose Tyler didn't take her eyes off her mark. "The first is none of your business and as for the second, they can understand us. Jus' won't get off your high horses to dirty your tongues with our primitive language will ya?" she mocked her opponent.

In response, the Sycorax made the guttural sounds of his speech.

"The people?" Rose questioned as if she could understand. "Oh you mean all the O-positives! I'm sure they'll be fine after we destroy your ship and the blood control with it."

The assembly of Sycorax turned at the repetitive and concussive sound of a firing gun. A widely-grinning, obviously smug, man was standing next to remains of some sparking tech.

All the Sycorax tensed, seemingly ready to tear them apart.

"Always have to be difficult," they heard Rose mutter before she twitched a hand behind her back and withdrew a sword.

"As Defender, I challenge you," she shouted as she leveled her blade at what they assumed was the leader.

Her opponent laughed.

Rose didn't seemed to be particularly pleased. "Do you forfeit because of fear?! Are you just a kalak pel kasa kree salvak?"

The Sycorax growled, unsheathed his sword and rushed at the slight woman.

SG-1 stiffened, preparing to intercept.

"Stop," someone hissed. A spiky haired blond.

"Don't interfere. Get your teleport thing ready for six," the dark-skinned, gun-happy guy from earlier added.

They could do nothing but watch as Rose engaged her foe, spinning and dodging, using her speed to wear him down.

When he faltered her sword was just a quick flash. The head bounced thrice before stopping at Mitchell's feet.

"I have defeated your Champion! Withdraw or meet the same fate!" Rose roared, every inch the victorious warrior, splattered with blood and soaked with sweat.

Rose stepped closer to her fellow humans.

"Fortuna, we need an exit for six," Mitchell ordered quickly.


"Torchwood? You guys have an alien division?

"How did you know their species? And their language? What was it you said, khalak pell casa kree salvak?"

"Your prowess with a sword was impressive, where did you learn?"

"Extrapolating and using blood to control the population? What technology were they using?"

Mickey and Jake shared amused grins as Rose was bombarded on all sides.

"Oi!" Rose halted the questions with an upraised hand and the edged smile she'd given the Sycorax before challenging him before answering their questions in a rush, "You're not the only people in the alien business, we've met the Sycorax before and don't repeat anything I said, an intensive and painful amount of time with a sadistic master and I don't know. Now, we're going home. It's Christmas and my Mum will kill us if we miss dinner."

"And she's scarier than a Sycorax!" Mickey remarked loudly.

Jake nodded in complete agreement.

The three made a motion over their wrists and were gone.

Several cries of surprise and indignation followed their departure.
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A/N: Yes, I know DW says A-positive, but parallel world so O-positive.