Disclaimer: I don't own Sam, Dean, or Supernatural. Only this little plot.
A/N: I wanted to write a short OneShot, so I hope you will take the few minutes to read this one. Leave me a little note at the end, pretty please.
Sam paces back and forth across his dorm room, burning a hole in the thick carpet. He had picked up his pen too many times to count, not getting the inspiration to write. He had started a letter once or twice, but couldn't figure out quite what to say.
Sam had arrived at Stanford only one month ago with much uncertainty and many phone calls from Dean. But Sam couldn't bring himself to answer the phone, resorting to ignoring the calls and letting his voice mail or the answering machine get it.
But now here he was. Stopping for the tenth million time, Sam picks up his pencil, shakes it lightly over the piece of letter paper, before throwing it angrily back onto his desk and returning to his pacing.
The youngest Winchester glances anxiously out the dorm window into the night. Instantly stopping his pacing, he notices two young college students climbing down a tree to escape their tight dorms and go join the rave taking place just down a few blocks. Sam's eyes are focused on a young brunette boy who had just slipped and almost came crashing to the ground, but he grabbed onto a low branch and dropped down safely.
Sam's eyes well with tears as he remembers many years ago...
A loud crash is heard outside. 12-year-old Dean Winchester runs outside and is greeted with the sight of his little brother sitting on the ground hugging his knees, crying softly. Branches lay unceremoniously around him.
Dean rushes over to his trembling brother. "Sam, what happened?"
Sam shakes his head violently, keeping his mouth shut.
Dean bends down, worry eminent on his face. "Sammy..." He looks at his brother, assessing the cuts on his hands, knees, and face. Placing a gentle hand on his shoulder, Dean softly asks, "What happened?"
Sam continues to tremble. "I wanted to prove to you that I could climb the stupid tree, but I couldn't do it... I fell." He begins to cry frighteningly hard.
Wrapping his arms comfortingly around his brother, Dean attempts to calm him down. "Shh..." he coos. "Sam, you didn't need to prove anything to me."
"But you said I was weak," Sam retorts.
Dean shakes his head. "I was angry."
"You said I had to learn to take care of myself."
Sighing, Dean replies, "No, Sammy. I will always be there to protect you." Dean grabs onto Sam's scratched hand. "Come on. What do you say we go inside?"
Sam visibly melts to Dean's touch. He nods. Dean helps Sam off his butt and supports him back to the house
Sam stares, tears freely falling down his cheek.
How could he have left like that? How could he have left his brother after all he had done? Dean doesn't deserve this. Sam doesn't deserve Dean.
Sam sits down finally at his brown desk and grabs a sharpened pencil. He quickly starts writing, the words flowing smoothly onto the paper.
I know that when I left, you were the last person I was thinking of. All I wanted to do was to get as far away from Dad as I possibly could. I shouldn't have put you through that. You didn't need this after all the crap we had been through together.
I'm sorry for ignoring your calls, but I didn't know what to say. I didn't know how I would react to whatever you had to say. I couldn't stand to hear you beg for me to come back. It kills me. But I have finally figured that I just don't belong in your world anymore. I just couldn't stay.
I hope that you can forgive me. I just wanted to tell you good-bye.
Love you, Dean. So sorry,
Staring at his letter, Sam contemplates all of Dean's reactions or thoughts. Finally he grabs a plain white envelope, sealing the letter inside. Writing down the current address Dean had given him a week ago, just in case he wanted to come back, Sam stands up. But not moving, he holds the letter in both hands.
His mind reels with different thoughts, nervous and unsatisfied. Sam then takes a quick look back outside the window, his eyes locking on the lone tree.
There it stands, silent and still. No one there to keep it safe, to keep it company. It is alone in a stone courtyard, a strange world to it. It was different in a place like this and totally, utterly alone.
That single tree reminds Sam alot of himself. He sighs deeply; his attention refocuses on the letter.
Shaking his head silently to himself, Sam sighs one more time before walking over to his black shredder and sending that letter into the blades. It roars to life and quickly engulfs the letter, shredding it into diamond shaped pieces.
There is no turning back, but Sam couldn't do it. Staring at the remains of the letter, Sam walks back over to the desk and scribbles a quick note on a new piece of paper:
Someday soon, maybe.
The young man sadly approves, sealing the note in a smaller envelope. And before he can change his mind, Sam leaves his own dorm. He takes the stairs down and soon feels the brisk air of night grace his face.
Wiping the drying tears from his face, Sam enters the office and quickly deposits the envelope into the mailbox.
He wastes little time getting back to his dorm. Sam locks the door and takes one more quick glance at the lone tree before slamming the curtains shut.
He chose to be alone. He could have stayed and put up with his father's crap, just so long as he had his family. But he threw it all away; he did choose to be alone. And for that he could never go back. He didn't belong in the world of hunting and the supernatural, so he no longer fit in with his family.
Sam had said his final good-bye and maybe someday he could go back... someday soon hopefully.
But for now he would remain... alone.
A/N: I was looking for a new story to write when my mom suggests I write a letter to my aunt. That made me want to write a letter... to Dean. I hope you liked it. But whether you did or didn't, please leave me a review. Tell me why or why not.