Author's note- I must confess, this started out as a different story entirely, but as I actually took the time to think about what I was writing, this is how it needed to end. Some ideas I just have to share.

Disclaimer- Obviously, I don't own any of the Twilight characters, but they're just so bright and shiny, I can't help reaching out to touch them!

Ch1 "The Talk"


I paused outside the door of Carlisle's study. As much as I enjoyed it when Bella blushed, I was suddenly grateful it wasn't possible for me, considering the conversation I was about to have.

"Come in," Carlisle called softly, thinking "I wonder what has Edward stressed this time?

It was true, with the wedding only weeks away, I was getting more stressed, by the hour. I was eagerly looking forward to having Bella, my saving Grace, as my wife.

But, there were so many complications. So many things that could go wrong. So many ways I could kill her. Of course I was stressed.

I had become determined to make it the least complicated as possible, and so here I was about to have the most painful conversation I could imagine. With my father.

I took a deep breath and went in.

Edward,Carlisle welcomed me silently, What can I do for you?

I cleared my throat. "I had a question, and hoped you might have the answer." Please let it be that easy, I thought.

Yes? He prompted.

"Well, it's a medical question, really," I could hear Carlisle's confused thoughts and responded, "Yes, I know, I know, two medical degrees notwithstanding. This is a question about vampire biology, which, generally, they don't cover in school."

I was able to smile, briefly. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

But, Edward, you are as much a vampire as I am. What expertise could I have, that you don't?

I winced at his choice of words. I was wrong, this would be bad.

"Well," I had to clear my throat again. "You're older... and have more experience."Please know what I'm talking about, I begged in my mind.

Technically, Edward, you're the more experienced vampire. I've never, well, rebelled, as you once put it. Not to offend.

He was going to make me say it. If I didn't love Bella more than life itself. . . .

I had to clear my throat, again, "No offense taken of course, but that's not really what I'm talking about."

He's so nervous, thought Carlisle, what could be wrong?

"There are some aspects of being a vampire I haven't experienced yet, Carlisle."

He continued in his increasingly maddening confusion.

"One, to be exact," I clarified. I gave and enormous sigh. I was going to have to make this painfully clear.

"An experience I never had as a human either." Please, please, please, understand, I pleaded silently.

It struck Carlisle with sudden clarity, Good God, he wants to talk about the birds and the bees!! I cringed and he quickly reigned in his thoughts, saving us both from even more discomfort.

Edward, I know you know the mechanics of it, what exactly is your question?

"Our venom," was all I could manage, still recovering form near death by sex talk.

What about it? Carlisle asked, Obviously it hasn't been a problem for you yet. It has to make contact with her blood. . .

"But, could it be passed," I paused infinitesimally, "through other fluids?" I was relieved to finally be able to form a coherent question. And again, hoping desperately he wouldn't need me to elaborate.

Venom is the only fluid we produce, Edward, I still don't understand. . .Thankfully, understanding came before he could ask me to be even more specific. Ah, I see. Your human medical degrees seem to have confused your perceptions of this particular experience.

"But you just said the mechanics are the same. . ." I began,

Carlisle's thoughts interrupted me, There are many human experiences we take part in, Edward, and the mechanics are the same, yet we are changed. Such as when we are sad. We weep, yet shed no tears.

I knew I had made the right choice in coming to Carlisle, he was ever the tactful one in the family. And he had been able to put my mind at ease, about one thing, at least.

But why does it matter? He was still thinking to me, Surely you can wait until she's changed. . .

"It's not me," I said, grateful again for the inability to blush. "It's Bella, she made me promise. . .after we were married. . .before I changed her. . ."I couldn't finish.

Oh,Carlisle thought, less surprised than I thought he should be, well in that case, I suppose we should find a way to make it safe for her, shouldn't we? Perhaps I could ask Esme or Jasper. . .

"What!" I exclaimed, horrified at the direction the conversation was suddenly taking."No, Carlisle, please, that's not necessary," I couldn't imagine having to involve anyone else in the family.

Edward, be reasonable. This is something you need to plan out. That you and Bella need to plan out. It would be very dangerous for her otherwise. You will need perfect communication and control.

I knew he was right. I had brought it up in the first place, hadn't I? But I had also very much lost the desire to continue discussing it at the moment.

"Look, Carlisle, don't. . .inconvenience yourself. I'll deal with this on my own."

And before your wedding night? He asked gently.

"I'll speak to Bella, I promise." As if talking to Carlisle hadn't been bad enough.

Alright,he thought, it's your life, and Bella's I could feel his concern for her.

"I'll talk to her, I promise. Thank you for, your time." I said and promptly fled the room.

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