Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me



Bullshit . To him, life was neither predetermined nor controlled. But right now, he had to take his words back.

He could hear the loud commotion outside, the violent thudding of the door. Surprisingly the door was still holding. The bodyguards were making a good job of keeping the paparazzi and an angry Sakura and her family at bay. Amid the chaos, he could hear his best friend chuckling behind him.

"It's not funny…"he growled at Naruto. The fox-like blonde boy continued chuckling.

"It's been what? The third time you ran away?" Naruto asked mischievously, his sky blue orbs twinkling.

"I did not run away…" Sasuke gritted his teeth now, annoyed.

"Right…" With that, Naruto began roaring with laughter. Gasping for air with much difficulty, he asked Sasuke the dreaded question. "So what really happened?" The raven-haired boy looked away.

"I don't know." He muttered stubbornly.

This was probably a record third time Sasuke had called off his wedding. He grimace thinking about the previous two failed weddings. Both had ended in crying brides, angry families from each sides and his face splashed across newspapers with bold headlines of "Uchiha Sasuke called it off. Again."

Maybe it WAS predestined that he'd never get married. It also didn't helped when Naruto cracked jokes on how Sasuke's children would have pink hair if he were to marry Sakura minutes before he was going to tie the knot.

"I think I know what you have to do teme!" Sasuke raised an eyebrow at Naruto. Naruto's idea of a solution would probably be to have Sasuke declare himself Gay and bunk off with another man. "You need to see a shrink!" Sasuke snorted. "What?! You need help!" As brilliant as Naruto's idea was, he couldn't help but think it was dumb. What an oxymoron.

Sasuke hated oxymoron.

"He's right dear, you have to visit a shrink." Sasuke jumped at the sound of his mother's soft yet stern voice. He had quite forgotten that she was sitting in the far corner of the room with his father and brother. He felt guilty seeing her tear-stained face. She had practically waited all her life to watch him grow, get married and provide her with grandchildren only to have her wait stalled longer. Sasuke scowled at his mother.

"No." His mother glared at him. Sasuke look over at his father pleadingly. His father shrugged unhelpfully, when it came to Uchiha Mikoto and grandchildren, Uchiha Fugaku did not dare interfere. "Oka-san…" His mother continued glaring at him coldly. The death glare he inherited was probably from his mother. "How come Itachi doesn't have to get married" Sasuke said instead trying to change tactic.

"You know why Sasuke…Your brother isn't capable of producing cute little Uchihas, look at the type of women he's dating, you on the other hand… " Sasuke looks at his mother in disbelief.

"Sakura's not capable of producing cute little Uchihas Oka-san!" Sasuke shuddered at the thought of mini pink-haired Uchihas. A loud snicker came from both Itachi and Naruto.

"Of course she is! Imagine those cute pink Uchihas…" By now, even his father was snickering at him.


"Wha-oh yes! It's final. You need help Sasuke-kun…appointment tomorrow at eight. Kato-san is going to book an appointment for you. Kato!" Mikoto got up to call after the family butler.


"That's final Uchiha Sasuke." Her tone was icily cold and Sasuke couldn't help but shiver. Mikoto shot Sasuke another look. Sasuke glared back at his mother before turning away in defeat.

"This is stupid."

The room smelled strongly of disinfectant. It reminded him of the hospital, what with it's white walls and silent atmosphere. Sasuke tapped his foot impatiently. His therapist was very, very late. Well, five minutes late only, but still Sasuke valued his time especially when this meeting was costing him a very expensive amount.

How much you may ask? Well, the pricing's confidential but still assuredly high. Not that the Uchiha family could not afford it being one of the richest family in Japan. Still…

The door clicked opened and in came his therapist.

"You!" He stared incredulously at said therapist.

"How troublesome…you're my patient?" A man with pineapple-shaped hairstyle stared at him lazily, sitting himself down into the cushy chair with a soft 'plop'. Sasuke was bewildered, his former classmate, Nara Shikamaru as his therapist? It was like some sick dream, how much more humiliation could he undergo?

"So. What's your name?" Shikamaru asked breaking his train of thoughts. Sasuke gave him a look. The hell he didn't know his name?! "Basic procedures…" Shikamaru drawled as if he knew what Sasuke was thinking.

Sasuke snorted. "Skip the procedures and just diagnose me with the problem."

"To diagnose you with a problem we need to know the problem. So…explain to me why you're here?" Shikamaru asked boringly staring at the blank wall. Sasuke gritted his teeth loudly. "So?"

"You know why I'm here Nara. Everybody does. Don't you read the papers too?" Sasuke sneered. "Just get it over with." He noticed Shikamaru's expression of amusement and it suddenly dawned on him. Shikamaru view this whole problem as pure, free entertainment. And he was getting paid for that too. It felt like as if a huge boulder had crashed on his head. What was wrong with him today?! Why wasn't he as sharp and quick thinking as he usually was? It must be because of the white walls and strong smell of disinfectant. Why, yes, it must be because of that.

"Are you in denial Sasuke?"


"Are you a virgin, then?" Sasuke glowered.

"What the hell does that have to do with anything?!" He snarled ferociously. His temper flared when he saw Shikamaru rolled his eyes.

"…Sigh… because maybe you're unable to have sex. And your mother wants grandchildren didn't she? Maybe…to start off in theory…you don't want to get married because you can't produce any children at all. There's no shame at all you know in that" Shikamaru explained with glaring boredom and a half-hearted attempt at sympathy.

That was the last straw for the Uchiha. Unfelt sympathy from Shikamaru? No thank you. He got up to leave the room, not without stopping to glare at his psycho therapist.

"I quit."

"You can't. Your mom signed a contract. Once you quit, she'll stop talking to you." Shikamaru shrugged as if not caring. Meanwhile Sasuke was strangling his mother slowly in his mind. Not that he'd do that in real life. He loves his mother too much; he was after all a mommy's boy, something he would not admit to anyone.

"Fine!" He made sure to slam the door loudly while he left, only to open it back. "I'm not a virgin by the way." And before Shikamaru could say anymore, he was gone.

Shikamaru simply yawned. He stopped short and frowned. "How troublesome… I forgot to tell him that Hinata will be taking my place from later onwards. Oh well."

A/N: Updating :)