This is my first fanfic, so I appreciate any kind of review. Just be honest and tell me if I should continue. English isn't my first language. Tell me if my mistakes are too bad. Thanks for reading.
After I found out that Dickie was still under the living I retreated into myself, wouldn't talk to anyone, wouldn't go out. I didn't know who to trust anymore. I didn't trust Morelli, that's for sure. He thinks of me as his girlfriend but lets me believe I'm still a murder suspect, while he is guarding the murdered. But could I trust Ranger? Sure, I trust him with my life, but could I trust him with the rest of myself?
The week when I wouldn't go out, I thought about all these things, but also about what I wanted for myself. Despite my mother's constantly nagging I didn't want to give up bounty hunting. I needed the chase, the adrenaline and the high after a successful capture. My mother and Morelli couldn't understand this. But this is my life. I need to be happy, not anybody else.
Ella came by every other day to bring groceries and clean. And she looked after Rex. I didn't even have the energy to fed him. I'm a bad hamster mom. She didn't say anything. She would just smile and get to work around me. And for this I was grateful. She seemed to know that I needed to think about what I wanted.
After 8 days I knew what I wanted. I knew that I needed training to get better in what I do. I didn't want to need backup all the time. I wanted to be able to help myself, to keep myself safe. But I also knew that I had to go out of the country to achieve this goal. I knew that if I stayed in Trenton the constantly nagging of my mother and Morelli, I wouldn't allow me to concentrate solely on my training and getting better. But this was easy. I knew Ranger would know a way to help me.
The other great problem were the men in my life. But I knew now that I couldn't trust Morelli enough anymore to be in a relationship with him. After a closer look at the relationship we had, I realized that we basically are friends with benefits. But I wanted it all, but I also knew Morelli wasn't the guy to give me this. I didn't need marriage and kids right away, but when I want it, I want it with somebody who I love and trust. Completely. So far, Ranger was after my Dad the only guy in my life who had achieved this.
Coming to these conclusions I knew I had to talk first to Morelli and then to Ranger. Afterwards I would have to go to my parents to let them know that I'm okay.