This is the rewrite of 'One Helluva Poker Game'. I didn't like how I wrote it, so I'm redoing it. Merry Christmas Eve! Big thanks to YuZukio-sama969!

Disclaimer: I will NEVER OWN D.Gray-man OR Harry Potter. That right belongs to Katsura Hoshino-sama and Ms. J. K. Rowling respectively.


NOTES: Allen hates losing by accident. Harry-Ron-Hermionie group will be the Golden Trio. Inspired by YuZuki-sama969. Takes place during Christmas.

It's Just A Game

The Joys of Payback

Allen Walker and his friends Kanda, Lavi, Linali, Koumi, Miranda and Krory had been staying at Hogwarts searching for innocence and the former four (Allen, Kanda, Lavi, and Linali) had been taking classes as well. It had been three months since they first came here, and they did not like it here.

It was the last class before winter break, Astronomy. Now normally, the 5th Gryfindors would be cheering, but not now. Why? Because:

The class was with Slytherin.

Malfoy was complaining about the lack of proper teachers and the presense of Muggle-born students at the school (he called them Mudbloods in a way that made it sound as if the word itself was filthy enough to make him throw up).

However, none of those complaints were accompanied by hatred as intense as the ones about the people called the Golden Trio. Allen, hearing Malfoy's insults about his friends, Harry, Ron, and Hermione, began to think of a way to get the Slytherin boy to regret his words.

"Hey, guys," a tense Allen growled, "Malfoy is badmouthing us - again."

"What else is new?" Harry deadpanned, not particularly interested. He was used to Allen informing them about every Potter-bashing word Malfoy uttered, but Allen's next words froze him on the spot.

"Well," Allen said. "He called the Weasleys blood traitors, and Hermione the most foul Mudblood ever to walk the corridors of Hogwarts. He also said Harry was a little freak who dares to oppose the Dark Lord ("No surprise there," Ron cut in.), and he called me a gluttonous, idiotic, slobby freak with white hair." After listing everything off, Allen was a bit short of breath.

All the people in the vicinity hoped the Golden Trio would be able to keep their temper. However, they were disappointed.

Enraged, Harry and Ron screamed, "What? That little - he's asking for his arse to be beat! " And although Hermione did not raise her voice, the hostile aura around her was enough to make the other students decide to take another route to their classes.

"Don't worry guys. I have a very good idea for payback." Allen said while cackling evilly with a shadow in his face. The Golden Trio were scared of the new perspective of Allen, but when he said payback, they listened intentlly as Allen developed his plan.

"The plan will place on Sunday in the Room of Requirement. We'll challenge Malfoy to Poker, and you know Malfoy will accept. We will play poker." Allen said. The Golden Trio wondered where was the payback, and Allen, seeing their confused faces, continued.

"Now this doesn't sound too evil, right? The trick is, a loser of the winner's choice must do anything the winner tells them to do, but only one thing." Allen finished. The trio were drawn in by the idea, but they were still reluctant.

"What that cheating scumbag wins?" Ron snarled, not wanting to be a target in one of those if Malfoy were to win.

"There's that, but I don't lose, at least to him. I'd rather starve." Allen snarled. He also added in a lighter tone, "You guys can win every once in a while so you can torture him too."

The trio looked on in horror as Allen became very demonic as he said 'don't lose'. They unanimously were for the plan, seeing as Allen would rather starve than lose to Malfoy, and the boy ate a lot.

Ron also added, "Thanks for letting us win sometimes mate. Now I can torture him too." "Me too." Harry said "Don't forget me!" Hermionie yelled.

The next day, a school owl flew torwards the Slytherin prince. Malfoy glared at the beast, ripped the letter off, and grumbled about how his privacy was being breached, seeing as he had two idiotic walls called bodyguards and a prositute named Pansy all over him and fussing over his every action. On the letter was;

You are way too annoying. how bout a game of Poker to make the anoyance stop? Winner tells one of the losers to do something, and the loser must do i, unless it's dieing. No one else has a say in. Come to the room on the seventh floor across the portrait of a man being mauled by Giants, alone. Anyone else will be forced outside. No telling anyone what or why you're doing it either.

- Allen Walker, Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, & Ron Weasley.

As he read and reread the letter, Malfoy measured the pros and the cons of accepting this request.

If he won, he could force stupid Potter to torture Weasley, but if he lost, not only would lose the game, but he would also lose his pride, dignity, and - God forbid - his virginity (although to whom he didn't want to know, let alone want to know, especially not the cow Pansy Parkinson. ).

However, in the end, the though of beating the Golden Trio at something overweighed all his conscience had to say against the matter, and Malfoy accepted the invite without further debate.

We now find, sitting around a table with their cards in hand, a poor sap, sitting with the evil poker player, and the Golden Trio.

The room they sat in was Untraceable: nobody, not even Dumbledore, would be able to find it.

That, of course, left the five to play their game in peace. Sitting between Harry and Malfoy, Allen (who was the only person patient enough to sit beside Malfoy without spilling blood) was dealing.

On Harry's other side was Ron and Hermione. They had decided that, with every new hand, the dealer's role would be passed on to the person on their left.

(Okay, that was confusing, even for me the authoress. The seating order is:

HarryCard spaceAllen


"Call.", everyone said as they sat around the table. "On the count of three, show your cards! 1, 2, 3!", Allen cried and everyon threw their cards down.

Silence permeated the air. Then suddenly a voice rang out.


The voice belonged to Ron. He was groaning as he found himself with a pair of jacks. Hermionie was scowling darkly as she compared her three sixes, with Harry's pair of queens and kings. Malfoy though, had a 2, 3, 4, 5, & 6. The Golden Trio all groaned and looked as if they ate a whole lemon.

"Shit on a cracker!" Ron and Harry yelled. "The only way Malfoy will lose is if Allen has a straight flush or a better straight." Hermionie said as she sneered at the cards.

"I bet Malfoy rigged the cards, the little bastard.", Harry said. Allen however, only smirked an evil smirk that reminded everyone there of the devil on his black face and laid down his cards.

An Ace, King, Queen, Jack, and ten; all in diamonds.

Allen smiled darkly and said, "Well Mr.Malfoy," Malfoy looked like Allen was the devil, and he dreaded what he was about to do. "I want you to pay this." and Allen threw Malfoy a twenty foot long list.

The pale boy agreed in a heart beat and cooly scanned the list, trying to recover his dignity. As he went farther down though, his jaw kept dropping, until he reached the end.

At the end, Malfoy's jaw was on the floor, and his eyes were popping out of his sockets. Congratulations Malfoy, you are now a fish out of water!

In the Dark Lord's planning room, Lucius sneezed. He felt a chill go up his spine. ' Odd, it feels like a black hole has appeared in my vault.' he thought.

Voldemort then stood and asked, "Malfoy, did you just sneeze as I was talking?" while taking out his wand. 'Oh shit! I gonna get hurt no matter what I answer.' Lucius thought. Lucius said no, and Voldemort said, "Crucio!".

"Hey mate, what'd you give him?", Ron asked, while starring at the gaping Malfoy. "Well Ron, I gave him the debts my master usually makes me pay." Allen answered, being freed of the usually monstrous debts.

"How much was that?" Hermionie asked. "In your currency, about 10,000 galleons, 1,500 sickles, and 500 knuts." Allen cackled. The Golden Trio gasped.

As Allen had a tiny himself doiung a happy dance, the Golden Trio saw a chibi Allen with horns, a tail, red trench coat, who was cackling like the devil who recieved a new soul to torture.

"No way in hell am I gonna pay this!", Malfoy said, as he snapped out of his stupor. "It's either that, or say something nice about Dumbledore and Muggles in public." Allen countered.

Malfoy gulped, and took the less embarassing route. "Fine, I'll give you the money!", Malfoy yelled, flustered and angry.

In one hour, Malfoy gave Allen the money. A cheery Allen then sent alotted money to Cross. Cross however, only smiled and spent it on even more booze and women.

"Now for the second hand!", Allen cackled evilly, as the debt he usually worked his ass of to pay was paid by a retard.

The other Hogwarts students however, only smiled weakly and agreed.

They were afraid that Allen would kill them if they did not comply. Malfoy shuffled and passed the cards around, cheating so he got a good hand. Everyone called or folded, then laid their cards down, which were,...

That's the first chapter. I warn you now, the rest of the chapters will only have one or two hands played, so they will obviously be shorter. If you have an ideas on what to do to victims, please send me a review or PM. Thank you! :-)