Things I am Not Allowed to do at Hogwarts – A Sirius Black Story

By GoddessGirl


Well, it's been a while. But I have finally been struck with inspiration again. About my other stories – 27 Stupid Things Sirius Finds to do in an Elevator will hopefully updated in the near future, along with my hit story Time Warp [or, more specifically, The Past is Our Present, Time Warp's sequel A Book on Lily may or may not be updated. I'm not sure yet. Crying Out will probably not be updated, but it is b not /b abandoned. Memory to Remember i has /i been abandoned, though I may rewrite it. I found several changes that I needed to make to it.

Now – on to our featured presentation


Things I am Not Allowed to Do at Hogwarts – A Sirius Black Story

By GoddessGirl

'Harry, c'mon, you can't be serious about actually going.' Ron's remark was quickly followed by a loud 'ouch!' as Hermione whacked him with her bag.

'Of course he's going Ronald, he would get into much more trouble if he didn't!'

'But it's Snape, Hermione, i Snape /i . You know, the evil ugly greasy git that treats anyone who isn't in his house as if they were a piece of dirt?'

'Look you two,' Harry interrupted the bubbling argument, knowing that if he didn't soon he would find himself in the crossfire of a full on war. 'I am going to go to detention. Anyways, he said I was going to be sorting through the old records of what my dad did. Like all the times he got in trouble and how he got punished and stuff like that.' Ron gave a loud groan, Hermione gave a proud and triumphant grin.

'That means I'm going to have to be dragged off to the library with Hermione for hours on end.' This statement earned him yet another sharp whack.

'I'll see you two later.' Harry said to the arguing pair as he took a turn and headed toward Filch's office. He quickly found Professor Snape standing outside of it, a sneer on his face.

'Come Potter, your father and the rest of his friends have their own room of recorded detentions and foul play.' With that, Snape turned on his heel and stalked down the hall and took a left through a door Harry and never noticed before.

The first thought Harry had when he entered the room was that the person who had wrote down all of the detention records must have had a very sore hand. The room was quite large, about as big as the 5th year dormitory he slept in. All the walls except one were covered in shelves and filing cabinets, records sorted by the offender and the date they had broken a rule. There was barely any room at all to move around, but finally the two made their way to the very back of the room where an old wooden desk sat next to a bare fireplace.

'Unfortunately, I will not be able to supervise your detention, seeing as some pesky second years are in need of tutoring.' Snape growled, a look of obvious distaste on his face. 'I could not find another Professor to take my place on such short notice either.'

Many thoughts raced through Harry's head, this was either a very good situation or a very bad one. Harry doubted that Snape would leave him alone to do the work, maybe Filch was coming to supervise, Snape probably didn't place him under the category of 'Professor'. Suddenly, the tall fireplace burst into green flames and a man clad in old tattered robes stumbled into the room, blowing ash in with him. Coughing, Harry wiped his glasses clean and rubbed his eyes.

'Remus!' Harry said excitedly, running up to the old Professor and giving him a hug. 'How are you? How is everyone else at headquarters?'

'Hello Harry, everyone is fine.' Remus said kindly, taking a step back to dust of his shabby clothes and placing his broken suitcase on the desk.

'I must go, I will be back in two hours to see how progress is coming.' Snape sneered. 'If you still have not finished your work by then, then you must return tomorrow. Lupin has agreed to watch you for as long as it takes.'

'But Professor –' Harry began, but Snape was gone. 'Remus I don't even know what I have to do.'

'Oh, Snape wants you to re-record some of the more faded documents. Er, well, actually he wants you to record i all /i of the documents, but that's just completely ridiculous.' Harry gave him a greatful look, and then followed him as Remus walked up to a random filing cabinet and pulled it open.

'You might as well just go and rewrite Sirius' records. They're the oldest and he has the most.' Harry nodded and removed the first one from the cabinet.

'Sirius Orion Black, found accusing Hufflepuffs that they were 'covered in bees'. Wrote one hundred lines.' Harry read out loud.

'That was one strange day.' Remus laughed. 'I bet you all of his punishments were writing lines.'

'They were…' Harry muttered as he sorted through a couple more of the records. 'Why lines?'

'McGonagall went through a phase of believing the best way to drill something into someone's head was by writing lines. So that's what she had Sirius do.'

'Why was he accusing Hufflepuffs of being covered in bees?' Harry asked with a confused look on his face.

'Now that, is a story that must be told.' Remus said with a grin as he transformed Harry's shoes into two cushioned stools…


One word. REVIEW. [please? also, note, in these stories there will be references to things that are in our time then theirs, this was done on purpose for the humor. If you don't like it don't read it.