…Still not owning.
… … .. . .. … …
Lassiter wasn't all that surprised to wake up alone. Something told him he'd be seeing Shawn before the end of the day.
… .. .
"Dude! Not cool!" Shawn cawed, rubbing gingerly at the forming lump behind his ear.
Gus huffed, crossing his arms over his chest, pharmaceutical bag still in his hand. "What were you thinking Shawn?"
"Ow, ow, ow…I was checking on you." He whined, collapsing onto the couch and glaring up at him. "You don't have to be a…uh…a…something totally not cool."
"You hit me on the head." The psychic replied grumpily. "It kind of makes a good comeback hard to think of."
"You snuck into my house." Gus reiterated for the fourth time. "Now, of all times. When we just got done dealing with that creep. Why would that be a good idea, Shawn?"
Shawn sighed, kicking the coffee table lightly and shoving his hands in his pockets. "I know…I know. That's why I came to check up on you. I…kept imagining the guy was still alive and knew where you live. It was pretty freaky."
"Shawn." Gus frowned, sitting down next to him. "Are you going to be alright?"
"Who me?" He laughed. "Yeah. I'm going to be great. So since you're up, want to go for breakfast?"
"No Shawn. I want sleep. I was up all last night. If you want food, go cook something."
"Oh…okay." Shawn stood and headed for the kitchen. "So…"
"I was thinking, what would you think if I gay married Lassie?"
"What! Why? No. Don't even." Gus leapt to his feet, hysterical look on his face.
"So I can't be in a relationship with Lassie?" Shawn leaned back into the living room, pouting.
"What? No. I didn't say that. What are you even thinking Shawn?" Gus was clearly flustered, staring at the other man in astonishment.
Shawn shrugged, heading into the kitchen. Gus gawked after him a moment before quickly following. The pesky brunette was retrieving the things for Hawaiian pancakes. He just offered a smile at the horrified, demanding look his best friend was giving him. Finally, Gus set his bag down and flopped into a chair.
"Fine. I'll eat breakfast with you Shawn. Now what was that just about?"
Shawn beamed. "Oh. Okay. Well. This is the weird thing. Lassie totally took me home last night. Turns out he was right and I ended up not wanting to be alone, so…I slept with him."
Chair: 1. Gus: 0. The actual score was probably entirely different, but that was a nice start for the morning. Gus had tipped out of his chair, crashing to the ground, hooking his foot on the edge, and bringing the chair over on top of him. There was possible interference on the table's part but it evened out since it caught the chair part way though it's tip and caught the back of Gus' head with its leg. Shawn put down the ingredients in his hand and knelt down, tipping his head to the side to get a good view of his unfortunate friend.
"Y-y-you had…SEX with him?" Gus squeaked the word, voice reaching an impressively high pitch.
"No!" Shawn yelped, turning crimson. "God! Gus. I slept. Slept. That's all we did. We were just…we just shared a bed. God, Gus. No!"
Gus flushed, righting himself. "I'm sorry if your statement left a little AMBIGUITY Shawn! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?"
Shawn blinked, looking away in embarrassment. "I shot a guy."
"No. Hell no. You only get to play that card a few times and not on something like this. This has been a problem for a while."
"Gus…" Shawn whined. "Please. I could really use blaming it on the panic."
"How does that help anything?" Gus whined back.
"I don't know." Shawn threw his hands up in the air and returned to cooking. "I just…god this is crazy. I don't even have a movie reference for this! I…I don't like Lassie like that. Or…I don't think I do. I mean, I like flirting with him, but I like flirting with everyone. And I only stayed in his room last night because I was having a freak-out. So…I don't…right? Right."
"Okay. Okay. So…what?"
"I don't know." Shawn admitted, defeated look on his face.
Gus sighed, rubbing at his eyes. It was way too early for The Shawn-Rollercoaster. At this point, he was expecting to get a post card form Toad Suck Arkansas or Yazoo Mississippi in a month. He always did have an affinity for finding the weirdest named places. They waited in silence a moment as they both considered what to say next.
Finally, Shawn turned around and set the finished pancakes down. "I think I want to stay with Psych."
Gus blinked, fork halfway to his mouth. "You aren't running off?"
Shawn winced. "No. I'm not. I actually like what I've got going on."
"Good." He replied after a stunned moment. "But you do realize you'll have to talk this out with Lassiter, don't you?"
Shawn rolled his eyes. "Easy."
"And your dad."
He flinched, but continued to eat his pancakes as if Gus hadn't just said that. "Not as easy…but I can do it."
… .. .
"What the hell are you carrying?" Lassiter growled in annoyance, stepping sideways to let Shawn back into his house.
Said brunette psychic grinned shuffling the posters and various knickknacks in his hands into a better position. "Just some stuff for my room."
"Your room?" Lassiter scowled, folding his arms over his chest, pointedly not helping.
"Well you said it was my room." Shawn insisted. "And if you expect me to ever visit than it needs posters and distilled awesome."
"Distilled…never mind. Are you planning on visiting often?"
Shawn sighed setting his things down on the couch. "I guess that depends on what we're doing here."
Lassiter tensed, edging towards the perimeter of the room. Shawn crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the couch. An awkward silence sat between them, as neither was quite sure what to say. They'd been dancing around the subject for a week. When the blue eyed detective found a comfortable place on the wall to lean on and keep an eye on Shawn, they both fixed each other with standoffish looks.
"Okay. So what is going on here?" Lassiter broke the silence.
"Well…" Shawn hummed in singsong. "I just don't think I can do long term, but I am up for making out at your desk if my dad's sitting at his. That'd freak him out."
Lassie grimaced. "No. Just…no."
"Not an exhibitionist?" He grinned, earning a filthy look.
"You aren't on my list to repopulate the earth with." Lassiter said flatly, eyes narrowed.
"Of course not." Shawn rolled his eyes, waving his arms a bit for show. "Boys can't have babies together silly."
"You're missing the point."
"That you failed high school sex-ed?"
"That I'm not interested in you." Lassiter frowned. "Well…not like that."
"Wait." Shawn straightened, eyes widening. "How are you interested in me?"
"We both know you're a fraud." Shawn groaned loudly over him, but he continued. "So I want to know how you do what you do."
Shawn's face lit up. "Oh really? Because I'm still pretty sure I'm psychic. I am also just awesome though. Why, if I were to ever lose my psychic powers I'm sure I would be just as awesome a detective as I am now. Don't you think?"
"I think if you are psychic you cheated on your detective exam."
"Lassie! I'm ashamed of you!" Shawn grinned, sashaying across the room. "You should know I'm much better than that."
Lassiter gulped, eyeing the brunette who was very surely in his personal space. "Trust me. I know."
Shawn licked his lips, leaning in a bit closer. "You aren't uncomfortable, are you?"
"Yes. I am." Damned if that didn't take all his police training and every ounce of bullet-built courage to admit.
The fake psychic stopped at the admission. Lassiter stared at Shawn, who blinked up at him in surprise. There were a scant few inches between them. Slowly, smirking, Shawn reached his arms out and wrapped them around Lassiter's neck. He flinched, shutting his eyes and taking a very deep breath.
"Last time you were this close to me while we were standing, we had a gun pointed at us." Lassiter reminded him.
Shawn tensed up immediately, scowling. "You're being a sour skittle Lassie."
"You're intentionally antagonizing me, Shawn." Lassiter opened his eyes.
A simpering grin spread across the younger man's face. "Why would I do that?"
"Because…" Lassiter glanced down at his grin before flicking his eyes back up to meet Shawn's. "You like antagonizing me. You aren't going to stop antagonizing me. I should be trying to get you out of my hair, not keep you in it. You realize that, right?"
Shawn tilted his head to the side. "You should admit you like me."
"I have to go Lassie. You should tell me now." Shawn purred, snaking one hand up into Lassiter's hair and watching the vein on his temple jump.
"And just where are you off to now?" He sighed, eyes falling to the forgotten pile on the couch.
"I have to tell my dad the good news. He'll be thrilled to know I'm not running away this time."
Lassiter grimaced. "Do you have to bring me into this?"
"Yes. Yes I do." He chuckled, patting Lassie's chest. "I'll be back so you can whisper sweet nothings to me all night."
… .. .
"Why do people keep barging into my house?" Lassiter sighed, once again vacating the doorway so Declan, Luntz, and O'Hara could enter his house.
They came bearing pineapples. All in all, it was beginning to feel like a circus. Not two minutes into explaining that Shawn was out speaking to his father, Gus arrived under the pretense of Shawn texting him saying it was an emergency. Five minutes later, Shawn returned, looking very pale. When he recognized the three other members of the congregation, he narrowed an evil glare at Jules.
"I've changed my mind. I'm moving to somewhere tropical and lacking phones." Shawn growled flopping down on the couch.
"What?" Gus yelped, jumping to his feet. "What happened.?"
"Jules happened! And Buzz." Shawn shot another accusing glare at her.
"What did I do?" She frowned.
"My dad heard those stupid rumors around the precinct." Shawn whined, earning horrified looks from Gus, Jules, and Declan. "And worst of all, he approves!"
"What rumors?" Luntz asked, completely confused.
"Wait, I've been in the precinct one day and I've already caught something you didn't?" Declan asked incredulously. "They're the same observations I was making during the stakeouts."
"Seriously?" Luntz glanced at Shawn in surprise. "You're joking."
"God I wish!" Shawn groaned.
"Um…at least he approves?" Gus tried to be positive and only succeeded in irking his friend more. "Did you explain to him it wasn't…well, you know?"
"I tried. He said it was about time I figured it out!" Shawn was beet red, resting his face in his hands.
"I'm not to blame for this!" Juliet insisted. "…Wait…are you saying your not…?"
"Of course not!" Shawn glowered at her. "It wasn't…I can't believe anyone actually though otherwise!"
"You have to admit." Luntz frowned. "It was pretty convincing watching you two together."
"Will someone tell me what the hell is going on?" Lassiter snapped, turning all eyes in the room to him.
Gus raised his hands in defense instinctually, pointing one finger at Luntz. Luntz flinched, jabbing his thumb in Declan's direction. Declan immediately tilted his hands to the side to present Juliet. Jules fixed them all with thoroughly unimpressed looks before glancing at Shawn. Shawn grimaced.
"Dude. I already kind of told you, didn't I? Everyone thinks we're sleeping together."
Lassiter froze, horrified look on his face. "You can't be serious."
He took a very deep breath, trigger finger itching for something to pull because he desperately wanted to shoot someone. "Why the hell would anyone think we were involved?"
"Buzz saw us being friendly and things got blown out of proportion, I guess." Shawn shrugged, glancing at Jules, who nodded dumbly.
"Is that why you've been acting like this lately? To perpetuate the rumors and exacerbate matters?"
"I'm pretty sure that is an inappropriate word." Shawn dodged the question.
"I means to make worse." Gus offered helpfully.
"Spencer." Lassiter growled.
Shawn offered up his best puppy dog eyes. "You aren't calling me Shawn anymore? After everything we've been through?"
"Answer my question."
Shawn sighed. "Some of it was?"
"You don't sound so sure." Declan pointed out, quieting immediately when everyone glared at him.
"If only some was, than what wasn't?" Lassiter asked seriously.
"Uh…not really sure. Some of it was just to mess with you though…like the dates."
"They weren't dates."
"Yeah they were." Luntz and Declan informed him helpfully.
"Okay, you know what? You can get out of here." Lassiter growled angrily, pointing to the front door and sneering at them.
They shut up.
"Look we already went over this. We have fun solving cases with each other and getting on each other's nerves. Why does anything about that have to change?" Shawn sighed, folding his arms protectively across his chest and shifting his gaze to the floor.
"Because you kissed me Shawn." Lassiter fixed his blue eyes on the other man, ignoring the shocked looks on everyone's faces.
"On the cheek!" Shawn yelped. "Will you never let me live that down?"
"This morning we tried normal and you proceeded to put your hands all over me." He said accusingly.
"That is normal!"
"Only when you're faking your little episodes."
"I'm a real psychic! Don't bring that into this." Shawn huffed, puffing out his cheeks.
"You kissed him!" Gus yelped, having finally restarted his brain.
"I was trying to hand cuff him to the bed…" Shawn paused, realizing how horrible that sounded. "So I could leave. It was right before we left last night."
"So you kissed him?" Declan repeated.
"I was trying to distract him." Shawn defended himself, flushing deeply.
"Did it work?" Luntz asked, promptly shutting his mouth when Lassiter scoffed at him.
"Obviously not." Shawn rolled his eyes. "I smell pineapple. Can we have pineapple?"
"You're deflecting." Gus pointed out.
"Which means everything's back to normal. Can we please have pineapple now?" Shawn whimpered.
With an exasperated sigh, the discussion was officially sidelined. The impromptu pineapple lunch party was awkward to say the least. No discussion was made of the shooting and Declan and Luntz kept apologizing for effectively stalking Shawn. About the sixth time he threw a pineapple at one of them and officially started the food fight.
Lassiter was not amused.
When they finally cleaned up, he kicked them out of his house, leaving just him, Shawn, and Gus behind.
"You know…"Gus turned from where he was placing a new trash bag in the bin. "I…I think I could get behind this, if you do want a relationship with him."
Shawn almost dropped the mop in his hands, hurriedly glancing down the hall to ensure Lassiter was still in his room changing out of his pineapple coated shirt. "What is wrong with you?"
"I'm serious Shawn." Gus made to wipe down a counter again, but only set his hands heavily on the counter, facing away from his best friend. "You don't just stay in this city for anything."
Shawn froze, fixing Gus' back with a horrified stare. "Gus…you don't think I'm…I mean, are you jealous? Is that is? Because you'll always be my best friend."
"I know, Shawn. I know." Gus sighed, turning to face him. "But you have to admit, he must have done something to get you to stay."
He tried not to feel insulted, but there was just a touch of accusation in that tone that rubbed him wrong. "You're right. He did do something to keep me here."
"What?" Gus asked in surprise, caught off guard by the rough timber of his friend's voice.
"He asked me what he could do." Shawn glowered, returning to his mopping.
Gus took the hint. "I should go now. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" And when he received no response. "You know, I never tried to make you stay, because I thought it would make you happy. I didn't want to force you into something you didn't want, like you're dad had been doing your entire life. Even though I was stuck being alone because you were off elsewhere, I took your happiness into consideration."
"I know, Gus." Shawn whispered, watching his friend collect his coat and leave. "I'm sorry."
"Don't be." Gus sighed, hand on the front door. "If I'd tried to keep you here, you'd have never come back. You just need something different now. We can't be each other's only friends anymore."
"Yeah." Shawn smiled weakly, well aware that Lassiter was hiding in the hallway. "I'll see you tomorrow Gus."
Shawn waited until he left to turn around and fix Lassiter with a wholly disapproving glare. In return, the head detective crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the hall wall, looking unimpressed.
"You shouldn't be eavesdropping." Shawn scolded.
"You're in my house." Lassiter reminded him. "And I wasn't listening that long anyway."
"Because that makes it so much better?"
"Is everyone at the precinct really convinced we're sleeping together?"
Shawn groaned, dropping his shoulders. "I don't know how many of them believe it, just that most of them have heard the rumors. Including the chief."
"That explains a lot." Lassiter rubbed his face tiredly.
"I'm kind of exhausted, can I crash in the guest room for a while?"
Lassiter sighed gesturing to the hall. "Fine. I'll wake you up for dinner."
Shawn grinned, pausing as he walked past him. "Careful Lassie, I could get used to this."
"Just make sure you stick around long enough to." Carlton smirked down at him.
"Don't think I won't shoot you."
Shawn beamed up at him. "It only took one week."
Lassiter laughed, shaking his head. "You astound me. Did you know that?"
"I had an idea." Shawn admitted, leaning in to place a swift kiss on Lassiter's lips.
Hurriedly, he headed into the guest room and shut the door. Lassiter stared after him in a mix of wonder, amusement, and utter annoyance. Somehow, this didn't seem all that different from what they already had going. And if that was the case, well…he could get use to it too.
Shawn flopped back on the bed with a blush, smiling. So maybe things weren't exactly normal. And maybe he'd keep exploring his options. But really, where was the harm in that? He never had been one for any definition of normal. Besides, if his work with Jules was anything to go by, he and Lassie could always stay friends. Or as much as friends as they've ever been.
But that was always the second option, wasn't it?
… .. .
Three weeks later, Shawn was flopping about the precinct with all his usual pomp and circumstance. Lassiter rolled his eyes, shoving the younger man off of his desk and getting to work. Gus gave him a knowing look, shaking his head.
The rumors had effectively died down.
That didn't mean Shawn didn't still visit Lassie. After all, how could there be distilled awesome in his room if he wasn't there?
Any stolen kisses were purely incidental and completely unofficial.
… … .. . .. … …
I'll admit this final chapter was a bit short. Hopefully that doesn't make it any less satisfying.
Shawn seems the type, to me, to end up in a serious-unofficial relationship. Lassie seems the type to completely deny its existence.
It was a bit difficult writing this chapter because, frankly, I wasn't sure how to do it. I'm still not convinced that it came out right. The feel I was going for just isn't there, which is a shame. Maybe I'll rewrite it sometime, or post a different version as an alternate ending, but for all intents and purposes, this is it. It's all done now. I think the hardest part of ending this is that there's always more to tell.
I'm a bit embarrassed to say this is the first time I've ever finished a multi-chapter fic. I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did and aren't anywhere near as disappointed in this chapter as I am.