Disclaimer: All rights belong to Wolf Films.
Author's Note: A plotbunny from seeing "Big Bang" and Mike's stab at depth. My special thanks to an inspiring Disney Adventures issue that featured Darkwing Duck on the subject. Here's my first shot at early Lennie and Mike.
If I am a little off about my planetary mass facts, I apologize. I'll re-edit whenever Jack Horkheimer re-airs the segment or reiterates himself on PBS.
Timeline: Some time after "Big Bang."
A strapping young man emerged from an urban brownstone. Blinded by sunlight, he massaged his eyelids while policemen promenaded to and fro.
A gangly, older gent snaked alongside him. "Should I fetch your coffin, Mike, before you explode into flames?"
He eyeballed the crusty speaker. "I'm not a vampire, Lennie, but I feel like one — I haven't seen the sun in almost two months."
"A hangover was my original suspicion."
"These days, who has the time to drink?"
Lennie shepherded him onto a congested sidewalk, shrugging a shoulder. "It depends on what time of year this is. Come on, the pizzeria has a good two-for-one bargain this week."
Mike snorted. "I'm thinking my casual drinking days are over, for I want to keep my remaining brain cells."
"Good; that will make Van Buren happy."
"Nothing will make Van Buren happy. Besides, I'm going to need them for more… loftier pursuits." He jutted out his chin.
Lennie slightly smirked. "Pickup lines."
"Give me more credit than that."
He cleared his throat. "You wouldn't be you otherwise."
Mike extended his doubled up forearms. "Then, Lennie, I must be a pod person if I have priorities other than women right now."
"I'll call Ripley's."
He tipped sideways to him. "What, a guy can't expand his horizons?"
"You mean there's more beyond women and work to you?"
"Hey, even Casanova had breaks every now and then. Getting to my point, do you remember the Florence Manning case? That was right around the time of the last blizzard."
"Yeah, that was the radioactive mail bomb. We were dealing with her husband, the physics professor while you were trying your best Einstein impression."
"You could do a lot worse than Einstein, my friend." Mike waved a pointed finger at a gridlocked street. "Look at all these people stuck in traffic. You think they'll care if the sun goes up in a supernova one day?"
Lennie veered away. "Of all the partners I've had, I end up with a wannabe Carl Sagan."
"I couldn't get the topic of matter disintegrating out of my head, so I've been reading textbooks in the spare two minutes I have for lunch."
"So, what, you're going to be a cop during the day and a physicist at night? I don't quite picture you in a lab coat, Mike."
His companion flicked at the lapels of his green business jacket. "Wardrobe's bad enough with these cheap suits, thanks. And the less said about my wearing tweed the better."
"You're a civil servant — 'tweed' isn't in your vocabulary."
"I could always wear my leather coat." Mike shifted his gaze toward the clear blue sky. "Fine, no more talk on supernovas or matter disintegration. But get this — did you know you could fit nearly two thousand Earths into the sun? That's nothing compared to the other planets in our solar system or the Milky Way."
Lennie scratched at his drooping jowl, lips downturned. "You ought to be old enough not to pull a Uranus joke."
"Oh, that's cute. Anyway, when I looked at the blocked sun, I decided to do some reading. I couldn't put the book down once I read on a star's empty space and how much you could cram into them. Once you multiply that in terms of galaxies, you start to feel insignificant — who worries about supernovas after that?"
He opened his palms. "So, the stars are really just open bins?"
His attention back on Earth, Mike then sighted and seized a dandelion weed flourishing by a streetlight. "In a way, Lennie, but a dandelion gives a good example."
The elder furrowed his forehead. "A dandelion?"
"Yeah, think about it. It looks whole because of all its seeds, like a galaxy with its stars and planets. There are several recently discovered galaxies, each no bigger than a dandelion seed."
Lennie snatched the stem, vigorously blowing on it. The youth was agape while thousands of spores floated into the air.
"There, my version of the Big Bang. You know, if you wanted to be a physicist, then you shouldn't have been a cop. And I happen to think you're a great cop. Now, can we get to the pizzeria?"
Mike's hand roamed through his sleek black hair. "Right. I guess I was getting a little starry-eyed, huh, Partner?"
"No problem. And I also forgive the pun." Lennie tossed the stalk aside. Unbeknownst to him, one of the seeds attached to the back collar of his sport coat.
Eyeing the germ, his fellow officer ushered him down the walkway. "C'mon, I'll buy."
"Thanks. Sorry I wrecked your moment, there, Mike."
He chuckled. "Don't worry about it. But you better be careful the next time you blow on a dandelion, Lennie — the Big Bang has to start from somewhere."
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