Hello all! Over break I watched "Little Women" for days on end and got inspired to write a fic from Laurie's point of view. This is my first Little Women fic ever, so please be gentle! Constructive criticism is welcomed, but no flames please. This is based off the film as I have never read the books. Also, I apologize if the ending is vague but I suck at ending one-shots and I didn't really have an ending written, just the main part of the story and had no beta. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize I don't own!

I raised my glass with a smile in my eyes and congratulations on my lips, yet my heart felt oddly heavy. He did not know her, this quiet professor of hers. He only knew the woman who escaped her problems by running away. He didn't know the girl who kept her burnt dress to the wall, who only knew the man's steps in the dance and who put on plays of her own creation with her sisters in their attic. He didn't know the girl who threw snowballs, cut her hair with no thought to her looks or who desperately struggled to keep her world from changing. He didn't know the frightened girl who turned down a selfish boy's proposal.

I smiled at my wife and our quickly growing niece on her lap as I conceded that I didn't know this woman who kept close to her betrothed and smiled secretly at whatever he whispered in her ear. I didn't know the sadness in her eyes when she looked on Beth's piano could vanish with a touch of the hand and a nod of reassurance.

Anger boiled in me at this stranger think he know the pain of Beth's death. He hadn't played with her, watched her at the piano my grandfather gave her. He hadn't sat unsleeping as Beth weakened each day with Scarlet Fever, hadn't held Jo tightly as she cried for her sister's health. Yet I hadn't comforted Jo when Beth died. I went to Amy and held her instead, yet feel unashamed for it. I love Amy; no woman could replace her in my heart. A small treacherous part of it still beat for Jo, and will do so until I die. She hand I were kindred, no spouse could surpass that bond.

Yet I didn't know this woman before me, and the longer we kept up this feigned civility, the longer we ignored past pains, the better I could pretend our spirits were no longer linked. I knew she remembered that day in the woods just as I did every time we spoke or looked at each other.

She wore no shoes and carried wildflowers. I remember nervously practicing what I wanted to say during the trip home, and laughed bitterly at my foolishness. How could I have thought she would say yes? I plowed through my rehearsed speech without a thought to what she wanted, to the fear in her eyes. I ignored her pleas, I could have stopped before I ruined our friendship forever, but I selfishly proposed without hearing the rejection in her voice as she begged me to stop. I think I felt it in her kiss; that we would break each other's heart, but she had melted against me a moment and that encouraged me.

She could not be tamed, not by me and not by this man, yet as I sulked in Europe I found I did not want to be the man who tamed her. My slow-simmering jealousy would bubble forever as it did now as they gazed adoringly in each other's eyes while we all toasted them once more. I knew we both chose people who would love us as we are now without knowing who we were, yet I could not help but wish that she had remained unhappy, still selfish as I was those years ago in the woods.