This is my first fanfic, so I hope you like it. Remember to review, please.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

8/05/08: I am in denial that Breaking Dawn actually got published. I haven't read it, and I have no intentions to. -SPOILERS- I've heard almost everything about the book from my friends, and I refuse to believe Jacob Black, the bloodsucker-hating werewolf, imprinted on a half-bloodsucker. And a little girl, too, for that matter. Hello?! Stephenie Meyer just repeated what Quil did! It's was interesting when Quil did it, but now it's gotten old. I just don't think Jacob would live happily ever after with Edward and Bella's kid. It's like a bad FanFiction, gone wrong.

THIS PICKS UP RIGHT WHERE ECLIPSE ENDED. BREAKING DAWN NEVER HAPPENED.


Jake's P.O.V.

I ran and ran. The pounding of my paws against the ground numbed my mind. I tried to stop thinking, to just concentrate on avoiding trees. After I got past the Canadian border line, it was easier not to think. The forests here were unfamiliar. There were no reminders of my recent past.

I stopped trying to keep track of how much time was passing. I didn't want to. Time was irrelevant. The only thing that mattered was water. I had to make sure I didn't get dehydrated. I stopped at every stream I came to. The cold drink helped refresh my mind. It was easier to think about her now. I finally understood how she felt when the bloodsucker left her. Abandoned. Betrayed. Unwanted.

The others would phase, listening to my thoughts. It was really annoying. I was trying to leave my old self behind, but they kept asking me to come back.

It wouldn't be long before they came looking for me. My dad would be worried sick that I hadn't come home yet. I'd never done anything like this before. I had loved my life. I was always a happy kid. Even when my mom died, I couldn't stay sad. She was in a better place and I knew that I would see her again one day. I would bounce back from whatever had me down. I was always flying high, and now I had come crashing down.

I finally stopped to rest in a small clearing with a nearby stream. The exhaustion was too much to bear. But I was far enough now that it would take them days to reach me (if they were even looking). The forest around me was alive with energy. All I wanted was peace and quiet, but it seemed like the forest animals loved to see me suffer. Especially the birds.

After I while, I was finally able to relax, and I fell asleep in my wolf form. But my nap wouldn't last long. A water droplet hit my face, then another and another. My rest was over now that the rain had come. I used to enjoy rain but now I didn't like anything. Life was pointless. It couldn't get any worse. The one person that had actually meant something in my life abandoned me. How could she do that? And for some filthy bloodsucker! Even worse. What had I ever done to deserve what I got dealt in life? I wanted to be normal. To not have to live miserably because I was a werewolf. Anything would be better than this.

The rain had begun to fade to a drizzle. My stomach rumbled. I looked around for anything I could scavenge. There were bushes around the clearing, but I wasn't sure if any of the berries were safe to eat. Probably not, since the birds hadn't eaten them already.

As I was looking around, one of the bushes began to rustle. I tensed, ready to spring if I needed to. If it was an animal, all I would have to do was growl. That would scare it away. If it wasn't…

Out of the dark shrubs stepped a… deer. False alarm. I relaxed a little. But not completely. Never completely.

My stomach rumbled again. I realized I hadn't eaten since… well, since I left. Which was about four days before. I missed Emily's cooking. Her homemade chocolate-chip cookies… No! I couldn't think about them. I needed to forget. I was never going back. The thought of their looks of pity twisted my empty stomach.

The hunger I felt was just a hollow reminder that I was human. That, at one time, I had been Jacob Black, Bella Swan's best friend. At one time.

But I wasn't that boy anymore. I was different, changed. I wouldn't ever be the same. I had traded in that carefree future the day I first phased. My name might be Jacob Black, but that is not who I am. I am an unloved, unwanted, rejected, lone wolf.

I laid back down on the soft grass. With my head resting on my paws, I let the hunger take me. Maybe I would starve. Maybe I would die and go to heaven. Or hell. Wherever werewolves went.

My heavy eyelids fluttered closed and my senses dulled as I drifted off into my escape. Sleep.

My eyes snapped open sometime during the night. My nose was burning with the familiar sweet scent. I tried to stand up, but something was holding me down. Something with icy hands.

"You deserve this!" were the last words I heard before I felt the pain. Then I couldn't hear anything. I couldn't see anything, my eyes were screwed shut. I think I felt myself transform back to a human, but I couldn't be sure, the pain was too great. Someone had set me on fire. I curled up into a ball, but it didn't help.

Nothing helped.

I laid there for what seemed like years before the pain lessened. After a minute of the weaker fire, it stopped.

Cautiously, I uncurled myself and looked around. The clearing was exactly the same. There were no burn marks in the grass by me. No signs that a fire had been here. But I couldn't really focus on that. Because all I could think was Wow. My vision is great. It was way better than what it was before. I could see every detail in the bark on the tree I was laying next to. Every little water droplet glistening on a blade of grass. I could hear better too. Every little rustle that the wind made in the trees I could hear.

Still confused, I untied my clothes from my leg. I put them on quickly, feeling a little awkward. They didn't fit right, they were too tight. But I let that go, not really thinking about it.

After I looked around a couple more times, I realized the back of my throat had this weird feeling. I'm just thirsty, I told myself as I walked over to the stream to get a drink.

After washing my face a couple times, I saw it. My reflection. But it wasn't me. It was way too pale. Those eyes. They were blood red. The creepy kind of crimson that gives little kids nightmares. But I had to admit the rest of the face was inhumanely handsome.

Inhuman! The last few days of pain finally made since to me. This was me. I had become a…a… No! It couldn't be possible. I was a werewolf. The two were opposites, they just don't mix. Wait…

No! What if I wasn't a wolf anymore? I tried to phase back to my wolf form. No luck. I just couldn't.

I made myself think of all the things I hated. Bloodsuckers. The Cullens. Bella for not chosing me. Leah for being such a pest. Myself. I tortured myself for endless minutes thinking how I hated Bella. But I knew it wasn't true. I didn't hate her. I couldn't hate her. Instead, I thought how much I hated her bloodsucker. Edward. I hated him more than anything else in the world. I still couldn't phase. No matter how furious I made myself, nothing happened.

No…no, no, no, no, no, no. It couldn't be! It made no sense. I just couldn't be a vampire.

My mind refused to accept what I knew I had become.

I heard hooves pounding behind me, and I looked around to see at least five deer running by. I attacked without a thought, I was so thirsty. The deer I brought down didn't even have time to feel fear, I was so fast.

And the taste. It was so sweet. The burning feeling in my throat immediately dulled, but didn't completely go away. I looked at the deer I had just killed and then at myself. I was covered in blood, its blood. What had I done? It was dead. Because of ME. I was a monster. A killer.

But what was I supposed to do now? I needed to know more about… vampires (I hated thinking the word to myself). The only "good" vampires I knew were the Cullens and I definitely wasn't going there.

But…I needed the knowledge. The thirst I felt could hardly be denied without help. I didn't want to kill humans, I knew that for sure. I felt bad even killing the deer, much less, a human. So…

I would have to visit the Cullens. What else could I do? I didn't really know any of the details about vampires. Our legends weren't very detailed on the vampires thirst. All I knew was that they were monsters who suck people's blood. I had no idea how often to feed. How to keep myself from killing people. What kinds of animals were best.

Reluctantly, I went back to the stream to clean the blood off my hands. I gazed into my reflection, still shocked and angry at what I was. Well, I was handsome but I didn't look like the old Jacob at all. The old Jacob's skin was dark and russet colored. This new Jacob's skin was pale and almost translucent looking. Even more pale than Bella's. Old Jacob's eyes were dark brown almost black. New Jacob's eyes were a bright scarlet color. If I wasn't one hundred percent sure that it was me, I wouldn't be able to tell, the change was so drastic.

That's it! I wouldn't tell the Cullens that it was me. That way, they wouldn't hate me right off the bat. I would just be some newborn vampire from… Port Angeles. I'd heard about the Cullens and I came to see if they could tell me about what I am. Yeah. That's it. I wouldn't be there long. Just long enough to get the information and go. I'd never have to see them again.


R&R