Disclaimer: I own nothing, other than the questionnaire.
AN: Here is my new story. Very random, I just felt like doing it, after Leanne did the questionnaire in Reality Quidditch. Yeah, it's going to be very long, and you'll understand that after reading this chapter, hopefully. So, enjoy!
Hello my good friends (and enemies, though there's only one of those, Hermione Granger, the stealer of my man. Grr….). This is Romilda Vane speaking to you, through my new book, The Questionnaire. I have found out how little we wizards know about our fellows. So, I decided it was in order to compile a questionnaire, to be taken by every single wizard known to man (yes, even those who have already died, thanks to my trusty time turner), and collect them all for the means of this book. The questionnaires all focus on the same things, but the questions vary. I mean, how boring would it get if I asked everyone who their crush was? I mean, reading my name over and over and over again isn't that interesting, is it? So, don't worry if the questions vary every few questionnaires; there are several different versions. My questionnaire will come first, and through it, I will explain how the questionnaire works. That is it, and I wish you a happy and learning reading!
-Romilda C. Vane
What is your full name and age?
Romilda Carter (it is not a boy's name! It is a family name!) Vane, and I'm currently twenty seven. This question will always be on the questionnaire.
This question also stays on the questionnaire. And, I'm a smart, spunky, beautiful, courageous young girl, who is awaiting her proposal from a certain Ronald Bilius Weasley any day now. So watch out Granger!
Where are you right now?
In my house. This will be on all questionnaires.
What are your likes?
Again, this is on all questionnaires. I like Ronald Bilius Weasley. Or Ronnie-poo, Ronniekins, Won-won, and a variety of other his aliases. He's super mega hot. Now, I know most of you think I like his best friend, Harry Potter. Those who think that are crazy, and need immediate psychiatric help. Who would change a raven for a dove? That's Shakespeare for who would want a wimpy, ugly Harry Potter, when they could have the mega macho, so hot you want to pout syrup all over him and do stuff that would make fully grown adults turn away in fear and disgust, sweet Ron Weasley? Yeah, I thought that. None of you. Besides, Harry hated me. I know for a fact that on Ron's birthday in his sixth year, he fell madly in love with me. So madly in love, that he broke up with his girlfriend. Now that's what I'm talking about. Well, better get on with things, I suppose.
What are your dislikes?
HERMIONE GRANGER! SHE THINKS SHE CAN STEAL WON-WON FROM ME! AARGHHHH! DIE! DIE! DIE! DIE! Oh, yeah, and this question will also be on all questionnaires.
What are you thinking about right now?
This is the last question that will be on all questionnaires. And I'm planning our Hermione Granger's death. I'd explain further, but I don't want to cause permanent mental trauma.
What's your favorite saying?
Actually, this is the last question here that is on all questionnaires. I really don't know what I was thinking when I included it. But, ah well. And my saying is Ron Weasley is hot. Which is a saying, by the way. I created it, after all!
Who is most frequently in your dreams?
Ronald Weasley! This question will always be a 'who' question. Like 'who do you currently miss?' or 'who makes your bed in the mornings?' and so on.
How pretty do you think you are?
Very. Everyone in my year swore I was the prettiest. But, for some odd reason, they crossed their fingers behind their backs while doing it. Strange, huh? Well, these questions all say the exact same thing, but the adjective will be different. I might use smart or arrogant, or gullible.
Would you rather spend a hundred galleons or save them?
Spend. On very high heeled shoes to make Ron drool over me! And maybe a tight fitting set of robes too… This question is always a 'would you rather' one. Like 'would you rather eat eight spiders, or wear green for the rest of your life?' or 'would you rather get lots of small gifts on Christmas, or one large one?' pretty much.
If you were shipwrecked and had only thing with you (no people), what would it be?
A hairbrush. My hair needs to stay perfect! And this is a 'what if' question. I highly doubt that you don't know what they are (like 'if a large spider was in the room, what would you do?').
First thing you do when you wake up?
Thank the lord for creating Ron Weasley. And this is the question about personal routine. There will always be one of those. Like 'what do you wear to bed?', 'how do you usually wear your hair?', 'where do you usually eat dinner?'. Get it?
What color do you wish your hair was?
Black. It's always been black, and I like it that way. Though, it can look very good on some people, like Ron Weasley, for instance. And this is one of the wishes questions, asking about stuff you wish. Like 'where do you wish you where?', 'what job do you wish you could have?', 'who do you wish you could meet?' and on.
Have you ever been overly obsessive?
Psh. Yeah right. Obviously no. Though, some of my friends are idiotic and say I have been obsessive over Ron. Let me set you all straight. Ron is not an obsession. He is a passion, like Monet had a passion for art. See? Difference! And this is a question on stuff you have been. Like for instance, it might ask if you've ever made balloon animals, or swum with a mermaid, and on.
Brush or comb?
Both. Combing gets out tangles, and brushing smoothes all the hair down. But, if I had to pick, I'd choose brush. So this just mentions two things (like the aforementioned brush and comb), just pick the one you like best, or the one you do. So, it might say 'Canada or Caribbean' and you might prefer Canada, and therefore say Canada. Or, it might be 'floo or apparate', and you floo places, so you'd say floo.
And that is the end of my example questionnaire. I hope you all understood! I had fun taking the questionnaire (and I assume the others did also), and I hope you have fun reading this!
AN: Yes, if you're confused, ask in a review. The rest will be shorter, as I'm not partially explaining what the questions mean. Romilda Vane will also never be saying anything here every again (unless someone is complaining about her, then I'll mention her). I plan to tell small stories through the questionnaires, so I'd welcome any advice or suggestions for people to write (other than Harry and the marauders and Lily, I have something special planned for them). Review!