Disclaimer: I own nothing

Disclaimer: I own nothing. This doesn't represent my personal views.


What is your name and age?

Newt Scamander. And I was born the year that wizards discovered that dragons existed. Yes, I'm old.

Describe yourself.

The speaker for magical beasts! I understand them so well!

Where are you right now?

Stroking my pet purple monkey…

What are your likes?

My book 'Magical Beasts, and Where to Find Them.' It helps spread awareness of magical beasts!

What are your dislikes?

Those creeps who abuse animals! Grrr…

What are you thinking about right now?

I'm wondering where my invisible pink-horned, one-eyed cat is…

What's your favorite saying?

You can never have too many animals!

Who is your favorite person?

I don't know about person… I love my pets above all others!

How sensitive do you think you are?

Depends… are we talking about with humans or animals?

Cause it's REALLY hard to be sensitive to humans…

Would you rather read a dictionary, or be friends with poachers?

Is it a dictionary of animals? Otherwise I'll be friendly to the poachers… and THEN murder them.

What if there were no such things as animals?

Well, I'd die. Cause I'm NOTHING without animals!

And the food chain would have ceased to exist.

At least that takes care of poachers.

First thing you do after breakfast?

Pet all my animals! And that takes me about until lunch…

But, if you think THAT'S hard, just wait till feeding time…

Wish for the world?

That we would stop killing off animals! Did you know multiple species become extinct each day? I know! It's HORRIBLE!

Have you ever been sympathetic towards humans?

Humans? What's there to be sympathetic towards! They decide their own futures! It's not like animals, which have no choice!

Garfield or Tiger?

Tiger! I mean, both were created by humans, but Garfield doesn't retain half of the wonderful characteristics of animals! He's been humanized!


AN: I love Garfield! That isn't my personal view, but it's Newt Scamander's view. That's how it turned out, it isn't meant to be offensive! There's one chapter left (GASPETH, I know), and it's a surprise character! Review!