Martha Jones and the Doctor stood on top of a hill, looking down into a field filled with sheep. It was a beautiful day, mildly cloudy, with a bracing wind breezing through the valleys.He was a tall, youngish man, dressed in a brown pinstripe suit. She was a twenty something woman, in a denim coat and jeans.

"Wow…" murmured Martha in awe.

"What's so 'wow'?" asked the Doctor, mild confusion in his voice. "They're only sheep."

"Yeah", said Martha, pointing to the hill behind them. A large door with roundels in it was embedded in it, and beyond that, the rest of the TARDIS. "Sheep. Inside your TARDIS."

"Well, what's wrong with that?" asked the Doctor, looking from her to the door, to the sheep, then finally back to her.

"Even if it is bigger on the inside…"

"Which I think we've established by now", interrupted the Doctor.

Martha glared at him, then continued softly.

"As I was saying, even if it is bigger on the inside, how can a spaceship have an ecosystem?"

The Doctor pondered this for a second, scratching his chin.

"The TARDIS is more than a machine, Martha, it's alive", he said at last. "Maybe it picked up an ecosystem, as an experiment?"

Martha stared at him. He often came up with nonsense like this.

"Sorry, that made no sense", she said. "Anyway, isn't there a ceiling up there?"

"Oh, probably," said the Doctor, looking up. "Must be a few hundred light years away."

"Sorry, you've lost me again," said Martha, shaking her head.

The Doctor grinned.

"Nothing I ever say makes sense, unless you listen in between the lines."

Martha shook her head again.

"You're mad", she said.

"Yeah, I know. Anyway," he said, turning to the door, "I think it's time for as trip."

He walked out the door, leaving Martha to follow him.


They headed back to the console room, but the Doctor was as bad a navigator INSIDE the TARDIS as he was flying it.

They ended up in a small white walled room.

It took Martha a couple of minutes to realise that it was a TARDIS console room. It had roundels, and in the centre of this room, there was a small TARDIS console, hexagonal and utilitarian, with old fashioned levers and switches.

"Wow…" said the Doctor, looking around.

"What is this place?" asked Martha. "Some sort of spare control room?"

"Old console room. Control room two", the Doctor replied. "Closed for redecoration."

"Why?" asked Martha.

"I don't like the colour", replied the Doctor, airily.

He walked to the console and brushed his fingers against the panels.The console hummed to life, lights coming on, and then, to Martha's amazement, the colour started shifting, almost imperceptibly, from a bright white to a light green.

The Doctor laughed and clapped his hands together.

"I like it", he said, grinning.

He turned to Martha, who was staring at the room in wonder.

"Shall we stick around?" he asked.

Martha smiled, and nodded.


Later, in the small TARDIS console room, the Doctor was considering their next destination.

"Barcelona? No. Gordafra? No. Lock-tar Morakai? Good God no."

"Any luck?" asked Martha.

"None. I can't think of a single place to take you…"

His face suddenly lit up. he jumped around the console, pushed a few buttons, pulled three levers at once - including one with his teeth - and pushed a big red button.

"Ieh-mo Kei!" he yelled.

"Bless you", said Martha.

"No, Ieh-mo Kei the holiday resort!" said the Doctor. "It's perfect! Sun, sand, sea's, sun…"

"You already said sun", said Martha.

"There's two", replied the Doctor. "Perfect place to top my tan up!"

"You have been looking kinda pale," smiled Martha. "Some sun and fresh air, might be good for you..."

"Doctor's orders?" he asked, deadpan.

She smiled and laughed.

"Then it's settled!" yelled the Doctor.

He set the controls, and they were off.


Wembley stadium roared in appreciation for the singer. He was singing the best of the Smiths, and clearly loved every minute.

He was youngish, in a silver suit set off with black pinstripes, and he wore black converse trainers.

The Doctor was having the time of his lives.

He sang his hearts out for these people, knowing that they would remember forever 'Johnny Smith, tribute artist' as the man who had started off the 2278 London Olympics.

"#The most impassionate song to a lonely soul is so easily outgrown…" he sang.

He finished the song, and looked at the audience.

"This next one is not a Smiths song, but it's one that's close to my heart."

He took a breath, and then the music started.

"#Well, I've roamed about this Earth with just a suitcase in my hand…"


The Doctor ran for the TARDIS, grinning broadly. He had loved every second of that, and the audience had too, thank goodness.

He came up to the TARDIS, but stopped, his face turing from happy to slightly scared in the blink of an eye.

A young woman in a t-shirt and jeans was standing in the doorway, a look of mock impatience on her face.

"Finished?" she said in an exasperated tone.

"Yep", said the Doctor, grinning.

Sophie Munro shook her head. This man was both infuriating and adorable, but his habit of singing Smiths songs was getting worse. Now he was gate-crashing sporting events, just to sing to a willing audience.

She had met him a while ago, when the school she'd been working as a Science teacher at was attacked by aliens. Since then, he'd regenerated, from a pleasent chap in Victoriana to a youngish man with a love of pencil thin suits,. The Smiths thing was something that had carried over from the other him.

"Then can we go? I seem to remember a promised trip to the planet Barcelona…"

The Doctor stopped grinning. He assumed a serious face.

"Barcelona, right. Let's go, then," he said, in a low, grim tone.

He ran into the TARDIS, Sophie following.


The console room was a twelve foot high dome, with four Roman style pillars holding it up. The whole thing was sci-fi silver, decorated with golden yellow roundels.

At the centre of it all was a six sided consle, with golden levers and buttons and, oddly, a Dell laptop painted white. At the center of this console was a tall glass columm, with little glass tubes in it.

He pressed a button, pulled a lever, and typed the co-ordinates into the Dell laptop, which he had wired into the console.

"Barcelona," he muttered. "Right, then, co-ordinates 222 by 662, year 3972. Perfect."

His hand hovered over a big red button – a recent addition to the console, and he always hesitated before pressing it.

"Ready?" he asked.

Sophie held on to the console. The ride was always bumpy.

"Ready", she said.

The Doctor nodded, and pressed the button.


"Eye of Orion. Lovely place, by any standards."

Rose Tyler nodded, sighing, because whatever happened, they'd go to the Eye of Orion, the place would be swarming with Daleks or some such thing, and they'd get into another adventure. Whoo - bleeding - hoo.

Rose and the Doctor were standing inside the TARDIS control room, which was a large dome-like structure in electric blue, with a gunmetal console in the centre.

This Doctor was a posh chap, with a stiff wing collar shirt, a sand coloured cravat, a brown Edwardian suit and smart shoes.

"No, really though. No indigenous life, no hostile life forms, no creatures at all. Just ruins, rest and relaxation.

Rose perked up. Maybe this wouldn't be a total waste. Rest and Relaxation? That she could deal with.

Travelling with the Doctor was alright, but one could get tired of getting threatened by alien beasties.

"OK Doctor, you've convinced me", she said, smiling. "Let's go."

The Doctor smiled as well, and set them off, pulling a great big lever with the woird "GO" written on it in big blue letters.

He turned to Rose, an inquisitive look on his face.

"Have you called your mother recently?" he asked.

"No", she said. It was rare that the Doctor took an interest in her mother.

"Well, I think you ought to", he said. "She'll be worried sick if you don't."

"Why do you care?" asked Rose, suspisciously.

"I don't fancy popping back to visit and having her slap me again", he said, his tone unconvincngly casual.

"Oh," she sighed in relief. "For a moment there, I thought you were taking an interest in my mother."

The Doctor looked at her, shock evident on his face.

"Good grief, no", he said, utterly appalled. "I wouldn't dream of it."

Rose smiled.

"So, what's the 'Eye of Orion' like anyway?" she asked.

"Like the countryside of England, the beauty of nature. Like Yorkshire."

"Oh. Doesn't sound like too much fun."

The Doctor thought she actually liked all that dangerous stuff. She travelled with him to see the universe, not to get killed by it.

"I'll admit, it isn't THAT much, but considering the DISASTER of New Earth, I'd rather go somewhere boring than somewhere filled with insane Cat Nurses and disease ridden Zombies."

Rose pretended to think about it, then nodded.

"You're right," she said.

The TARDIS made that horrible 'vworp vworp' noise that signalled that it had arrived.

"Ah, we're here", said the Doctor.

Rose put her coat on, and the Doctor pulled his grey cloak over.

"Shall we look outside?" he asked.

Rose looked at him.

"Well, duh," she said.

He smiled, and went outside.