Title: Let me guide you through the rain
Author: TynDawn
Rating: M
Warnings(If any): Yaoi (( Man-sex ))
Pairing(s): ZackxCloud
Disclaimer: I am in no way affiliated with Square-enix and do not own any of the mentioned characters, places, etc... and am merely borrowing them for entertainment purposes and will return them in mint condition back to the shelf from whence they came.
Summary: Zack and Cloud have been engaged in an intimate relationship for quite some time, but does Zack realize just what kind of guilt Cloud has been feeling by going through it? (( Takes place in SOLDIER ))

Author's notes: I was in dire need of Zack and Cloud action and this is what became of it.

Cloud had never seen her face, but he already seemed to know what she looked like, and he just knew that he'd never be able to forget her name. Aerith Gainsbourough. No matter how hard he tried, he was doomed to dwell upon that name and feel guilt whenever it ran through his head or trickled into his ears. Little did he know, another incident that was to be entirely different would cause that same name to cause even more guilt and pain to pull at his already worn heart-strings.



Again the name floated into his mind, twisting its way through the gears of his brain and cutting off any other thoughts or means of escape. Two cerulean eyes closing in an attempt to block it out, however, the blond soon came to realize that doing so only made the image more vivid. He could practically see her.


His eyes barely fluttered as he bit down lightly on the bruised flesh of his bottom lip. The bruise was a side-effect of last night, and of several nights before, along with the other marks maiming his body like a map. The fingernail marks and scratches, the love-bites and bright discolorations decorating his neck and chest and any other available flesh. In a sick, twisted sort of way, he loved those marks, but only because they were his conformation the next morning, telling him that the night before was no lie.

"Cloud," His eyes snapped open when he realized that a body was behind him, a chest was pressed to his back and a chin was resting over his shoulder, and wisps of hot breath hitting the shell of his ear as one palm kneaded at the muscles of the other shoulder. "Hey," the voice started again. It was Zack. "You okay?"

Cloud's hand moved to the fingers that were clasped over his shoulder, lightly lacing his finger's into Zack's grip. He didn't answer. Zack stayed silent for a moment, not understanding what was bothering the blond. They'd already talked about Aerith and the situation several times before; he didn't know that Cloud was still dwelling on it. With a frown, Zack turns his head, lightly pressing his lips against the expanse of the blonde's neck, and earns a tiny groan as a reward which pushes him to pull a portion of the skin between his lips, lavishing it with heated attention.

"Zack," Cloud closes his eyes again, the vision fading back into his mind as he gently cranes his neck back, "…Zack," The name left his breath in a whisper as a shiver mercilessly tracked its way through each disc of his spine and lingered at the base of his neck as he leaned back into the touch and lulled his head to one side. "We should stop." He protested almost weakly, "You need to go; you have to go meet with the general soon,"

"Seph can wait," was the muffled reply that was voiced into Cloud's skin as lips continued to press there, while one hand ventured to the planes of the blonde's stomach, enjoying the feel of the well-toned and sculpted muscles beneath. A shudder was Cloud's first response, his hand squeezing the fingers in his grasp as he rolled his eyes back and bit down on his lip as a thought ran into his mind.

"Do you feel…ashamed because of this?" He questioned breathily, "Because of us?"

Zack pulled away, looking to the other with concern touching his violet iris as his lips fell victim to a frown.

"Cloud, what brought that up?"

As Cloud pushed himself up just enough to put a bit of distance between them, he answered, "You haven't told her,"

Pressing a hand to his forehead, Zack braced his fingers on each side of the bridge of his nose, "I know…but, It doesn't mean that I'm ashamed of you. I know that you feel bad about this, but I'll take care of it, I just don't know how yet. You don't need to worry about this, alright? I don't want you to worry about Aerith,"

"But she's involved with this just as much as I am," The blond defended himself as he turned on the top of the covers and faced the older male. "She was with you first; she has a right to know that you've been sleeping with a guy for weeks!" He dropped his head, "I just…" He sighed in a tiny show of fluster, "I just feel like I took you away from her,"

Zack sighed and lowered his hand, brushing his fingers along the other's forehead before moving to cup his chin and lift the younger one's head so they could meet eyes. "It's not your fault that I chose you over her; I'm the one who made the first move on you, you shouldn't feel any guilt or anything because of this," He couldn't help but give the tiniest smile at the thought of that one specific event that had gotten them so entwined. Sure, he understood that smiling wasn't exactly appropriate at the moment, but he couldn't help it, not when he thought about the very first time that he pressed Cloud into the nearest wall and claimed those soft lips for his own.

"But why…why choose me?" Cloud detested the tone in his own voice, but he couldn't stop it by now, "Weren't you happy with her? Why would you be any happier with me? Because you know that you're going to end up being shipped out for missions and don't have to deal with me once one of us leaves SOLDIER?"

Zack pressed a finger to the blonde's lips and furrowed his brows, "It isn't like that, Cloud, and you should know that," He wasn't upset, but he felt a pang of hurt at the suggestion that he was merely using the blond. If Zack could have gotten Cloud out of his mind, he would have banished the thoughts on Cloud when he'd first seen him. "How many times have I told you?"

However, even if he'd asked the other a question, Zack had given Cloud absolutely no time to answer as he pressed his lips against the lips of the recruit, taking them as his victim. Cloud was powerless against that caress and any verbal lashing that he was about to unleash was smothered quickly by the touch of Zack's lips. All he could do now was succumb to that tiny but deviously satisfying warmth that was offered by Zack's latest action.

The older male pulled Cloud into his grasp, pulling his lips away and tucking Cloud's head under his chin as he wrapped one arm around the blonde's back, letting the other hand pass through surprisingly soft golden locks. Letting out a breath, he closed his eyes, "Cloud," He breathed out, pressing his face into those locks, "I don't know how many more times I have to tell you, to get it through your thick little head," This phrase was surprisingly endearing and adoring as it was said, "I love you," He breathed, "Don't you get it?"

A smile cracked over Cloud's lips and he found his hands curling into Zack's shirt as he tugged him closer, as if he had to prove to himself that Zack really was there. Only a moment passed before, Cloud pulled his way out of Zack's arms, staring up at those dark lavender eyes, his lips curling up ever so slightly at the edge before Cloud cupped the other's face and brought their lips together again.

The connection between their lips was more passionate before, more heated, and had much more feeling pouring into it as the blond tugged him closer, parting his lips almost as if begging Zack to take the invitation inside. No time was spent was Zack lingering, nearly instantaneously, his tongue traced those lips, just to tease the blond who gave an impatient groan and curled his hands into the darkened locks of hair adorning Zack's head. Moments passed by as Zack, once again, mapped out the space of Cloud's mouth, enjoying the feel of the roof of his mouth, and the jaggedness of each tooth as the blond moaned out into Zack's mouth.

Cloud was the first to pull away, panting out and letting his hot breath fan out against the other's flushed lips as he lowered his hands to Zack's shoulders and insistently pulled at the cloth until he managed to fling away the offending fabric article. The blonde couldn't stop his voice from hitching as he was lowered onto his back, watching the dark-haired man above him as Zack smile softly down at him and began to lace the blonde's jaw-line with tender kisses just before he ran his hands under the younger male's shirt, adoring the warm skin at his mercy.


A stutter from Cloud reached Zack's ears and Zack turned his attention, leaving it fully on the younger man who was sprawled across the sheets, with a flush the same shade as crushed rose petals staining the pale flesh of his cheeks, and who had tiny bruises scattered like snow-flakes on the column of his neck. Zack was enthralled; he couldn't turn away as he slowly pushed the blonde's shirt up, savoring the sight beneath him as he straddled the recruits thighs. Once the pale torso was fully exposed to the higher-ranked SOLDIER, Zack pushed himself back and carefully undid each button. Cloud held back small sounds and reached one hand down, helping the older man undo the buttons. Absolutely no words were exchanged by them, and both of them were just fine with that. Right now, Zack was telling Cloud everything that he needed to know.

Zack continued his venture once the pants were shed. Tenderly, he kissed along the blonde's chest, surprisingly, it was all much softer than it had been the night before. It wasn't raw and lusty, both actions from either man were slow and patient, as if they had all the time in the world, even though they had less time than either had imagined.

Cloud sighed out against the feather-light kisses and touches that scaled his stomach, and upper-chest, even his arms, eventually, Zack came to kiss and press Cloud's palm up to his cheek. The blonde grabbed onto Zack's hand and offered a smile down to him as he lifted the hand and pressed one kiss to each individual knuckle. The older man's eyes flickered up and he dropped the hand. At that moment, Cloud realized the desperation that had fallen into Zack's eyes.

Zack practically lunged forward, once more taking those lips, cupping the blonde's face and crushing his lips against the ones beneath his own. Somehow though, it was still much sweeter than any of those kisses that he'd received from Zack any of the few weeks before. Finally, the man above Cloud pulled away, as he frantically pulled at his own pants and threw them across the room before lowering his hips against Cloud's own pair of bare hips. A harsh gasp escaped Cloud's lips as he bucked his hips up, feeling that over clichéd feeling flooding down to the area between his loins as he grasped the covers beneath him into his fists, nearly shredding the blankets.

Kisses made their way once more down the plane of the other's flesh, tiny licks laced their way around the blonde's navel as his thighs were pushed apart in a motion that made Cloud groan out in anticipation. They had practiced and gone through these motions many times and neither knew why this time was so different, why each touch was so much warmer or gentler, why each kiss was more precious than the last, and why time made all the difference.

Cloud gave a whine that was all too welcomed to Zack's ears as the older male began to press kisses along Cloud's inner thighs, and lightly nip against the heated flesh. Soon, the blond felt a finger-tip at the flesh of his bottom lip. Lifting a hand, he guided the finger into his mouth and lovingly licked at the digit, placing kisses on the side and at the knuckle before he took it back between his lips. When Zack was satisfied and far too antsy to wait, he pulled his finger back and carefully parted those thighs as he pulled a pillow from the headboard. He lifted Cloud's hips with one hand and pushed the pillow beneath, carefully propping him to make it easier. Even if they had done this dozens of times, Zack was not willing to hurt Cloud, and he never would be.


The recruit bit back a gasp when the slick surface of a finger circled the muscle lining his entrance, making his eyes close in a silent reaction. Zack smiled softly and turned his eyes onto his younger lover's face, "Cloud, look at me," It wasn't a demand, rather a desperate request, which was happily fulfilled by the younger man. Those eyes were beautiful. They were deep and hazed, glazed over in a silent need that only Zack knew he could fulfill for the blond.

With a tiny grin, Zack rose his head and stared down to Cloud, keeping his eyes on him as he continued to tease the small entrance that was practically begging for him. Zack didn't stop though, and he went no further, keeping the tip of his finger just beyond the entrance and torturously circling it, adding just the tiniest amount of pressure. He paused, pushing just a tiny portion of his finger into the blonde's heat. Cloud bucked up with a cry and tossed his head to one side, "Z…Zack, Nnngh," He groaned out, moving a hand to his own mouth and biting down on a knuckle, "Stop, stop teasing," He breathed out, his voice cracking.

Zack lightly rubbed his other hand against the length of the other's thigh, smiling once more at just what he could do to the blond. He loved seeing Cloud like this, seeing just how much the blond needed him. More than anything, he loved the fact that he was being used for something more than fighting and killing, this had so much more meaning than anything else that he'd ever done in SOLDIER.

The black-haired youth took pity on Cloud and lowered his head, blowing a cool breath at the entrance presented to him, which caused the blond to grit his teeth and let out a wanton hiss as his head craned back. A cry was Cloud's response when the muscle of a tongue came to meet the ring of muscle that encircled his entrance, he couldn't keep himself biting down on his knuckle and his hand soon fell uselessly near his face. "Oh gods, Zack, M…more," He almost sounded pitiful, but Zack was horribly thrilled with that plea and wasted no time in slowly pushing his tongue forward past the muscle, being careful about it but not wanting to keep the boy waiting. Cloud's toes curled into the sheets as he spread his legs as far as he could managed, his head tossing to the other side as he pressed his cheek into the soft covers as more color ran up into his features. Zack explored Cloud's passage, taking his time, but being driven by the myriad of cries and gasps spilling from Cloud's tantalizing lips. His assault on the other's entrance became wild, his hands resting at the other's inner thighs as he pulled his tongue out and gave one tiny lap at the flesh before sudden sheathing his tongue into that tight heat once more. Cloud's fingernails dug into his fists as his back arched at the move, the planes of his skin flushing with coral as he moaned out loudly and unashamed, his hips bucking downward as if to drive the warm, slick muscle deeper. The blonde's body took on a rhythm of it's own, making himself cry out again as he rocked himself, forcing his lover's tongue inside of him, shivering at the feel of saliva as it dripped down his skin.

Cloud's breath hitched at the moisture against his inner walls. It was strange, through all of their times together, Zack had never done anything quite like this. Before, there was no time for anything like this, it was nothing but the standard issue of 'love-making,' they had never been worried about positions or foreplay or anything else that may have been registered as 'important,' But now, this was so much more than either of them had ever done.

A hand suddenly plunged into Zack's hair and tugged the other closer as Cloud ground his teeth; his eyes closing as his head suddenly tossed back, the motions of his hips suddenly going erratic. The muscles of his stomach tightened and his body gave a harsh shudder, his back arching as he let something horribly close to a scream out, his spine curving into a perfect arch as white washed over his stomach. His body went limp against the mattress, his hand carelessly falling out of the other's locks as he fell weakly onto the cover, his breath coming out in pathetic pants.

Zack pulled himself away, licking at his lips as his eyes clouded over. He'd never heard anything quite like that from Cloud before. As he straightened himself up, he allowed his eyes to wander over Cloud's naked form. It was glorious. He watched as the liquid made designs against the flushed skin and made tiny streaks as it made its way down Cloud's sides and pooled onto the covers. Even like this, covered with his own fluids, Cloud was amazing beautiful, and somehow, just as innocent as ever.


This was the only sound from Zack as he crawled over the blond and placed tiny loving kisses at the corner of Cloud's parted lips. Cloud's response was a tiny almost pathetic whimper as he let out a hot breath and lifted his eyes, staring up hazily at his lover when he felt the hardness of the other pressing into his thigh.

"I want you…" Cloud started as he pushed locks of soaked hair from his face, "…To lay down, Zack,"

Zack rose an eyebrow in confusion, he had to think about that for just a moment, but smiled after just a bit. Giving a nod, he agreed easily, "Alright Cloud, I'll lay down," Moving himself over, Zack did just that, he lay down against the covers right next to where Cloud was lingering. After a moment or two, Cloud pushed himself up and turned, staring down at Zack, watching as the older male waited with his hands laced behind his head of spiky black tresses.

With a light and rather out of place smile, Cloud situated himself, facing the other and straddling the body beneath him, leaning down and pressing one single chaste kiss onto Zack's lips. His hands ran up the length of Zack's torso, one hand going beyond his collar-bone to trace just beneath Zack's bottom lip, making Zack let out a breath of anticipation.

However, Cloud did not push a finger between Zack's lips; instead, he rose his other hand and parted his own lips, slipping a finger past them as he whorled his tongue around the digit. Moments passed as he made sure the finger was slick enough, coating it. However, Zack was not completely content with that, no matter how pleasing the sight was. Taking Cloud's other hand; he pulled it from his bottom lip and pulled it to his hand, pressing kisses to the palm before slipping Cloud's middle finger between his lips. His eyes falling half-lidded as he savored the taste of the other's skin dancing upon the surface of his tongue as he milked it for all it was worth.

Cloud whined out softly around his finger in accordance as he pulled the digit from his mouth, the tiniest strand of saliva connecting his finger-tip to the side of his lip. Zack swallowed at the sight. But the next sight would prove even more breath-taking. The blonde soon lowered the saliva-soaked finger behind himself and carefully probed at his entrance. Obviously, it was already stretched and still dripping from Zack's earlier explorations, so it was easy to press the digit into himself. He sunk himself onto his finger quickly, tossing his head back as Zack released his finger. Cloud's hand went down onto Zack's hip and dug into the flesh, creating tiny crescent-shaped marks as he whined out and forced himself downward until he was up to the knuckle. An even deeper flush fanned over his cheeks as he rose himself just a bit, just enough to show Zack exactly what he was doing; he used his hand to steady himself.

His lips falling apart with a cry as he carefully pulled his finger out to the tip; he lined the next finger up to the first and suddenly plunged them both inside. Zack could feel his heart beating faster and practically pounding the lining of his ribcage as he watched blond hovering over him. Violent eyes fell between Cloud's spread legs as he watched those two fingers disappear and reappear in his field of vision. Cloud gently clawed at Zack's stomach, forcing the fingers into him even deeper just a few more times before a third suddenly joined the pair. The blond nearly tumbled forward, but managed to hold himself up. His eyes falling close in bliss as he lurched forward and stammered, "Zack…Ah!"

"Keep going, Cloud,"

Zack breathed out as his hands reached forward, one hand clasping onto the blonde's hip and the other going down to grasp onto the hand that was connected to the fingers that were embedded into Cloud. Zack forced the fingers in deeper, making the pace go just a bit faster. Cloud's breath hitched in excitement as he shook his head and suddenly freed his fingers, taking Zack's fingers in his grip instead and forcing two of them inside of him in just one instant. Zack's eyes widened at the move as Cloud's torso tensed, the blond gasping out at the touch, at a tiny fluttering movement that hit something almost painfully sensitive inside of him.

Biting down on his lip, Cloud couldn't take it much longer, but continued to shift himself up and down on the two fingers as Zack continued to push them up into him, a third being added after a short time. "I…I can't," The blond stammered out breathlessly as he lowered a hand and pulled Zack's hand away from his entrance, only then did he notice that Zack was stroking himself erratically while he struggled to gain his breath.

However, Zack was able to stop himself, merely taking himself in hand and holding himself as he guided Cloud down onto himself by the hand on his hip. Cloud breathed out to the ceiling, struggling to open his eyes, which he just now realized had been closed just several moments before. Despite the tiny bit of pain nagging at the ring of his entrance, he suddenly forced himself downward in one swift movement, surprising Zack and causing the older of the two to moan out loudly and rock his hips upward, seeking more warmth inside the smaller body.

A rhythm was soon to develop between the two.

Zack had found his hands stationed on each of Cloud's hips, Cloud had taken over the tempo, forcing himself up and down as he pleased and tilting his hips in just the right angle until he had himself crying out until he was hoarse. Both figures were quickly wearing themselves tired, but neither had reached their final peak, and for what nearly seemed like hours, they enjoyed driving the other to their end.

Surprisingly enough, the older of the two was first to come, crying out Cloud's name as his back arched from the surface of the mattress and he once more Cloud down until he was sheathed up to the hilt. A cry was Cloud's reaction as liquid filled him, over-filling his insides. Despite the other's release, Cloud continued to move himself above Zack's softening length, finding a strange new feel about that as he let his own head rock back as he moved one of his hands and wrapped his fingers around his own awakened arousal. Zack let out a small moan and moved Cloud's hand away.

"Let me,"

Cloud couldn't even dream of arguing with that and was soon bucking between Zack's length and his hand. His vision blurring as his lips snapped open with a shuddering sob as he fell forward onto the other's chest. Zack moaned at the movement, but couldn't seem to move himself, despite the fact that he was still buried deeply into the blonde's body. He rose a hand and lightly ran his fingers through Cloud's hair, pressing a kiss to one of the blonde's temples as he held Cloud's head to his chest, letting their sweat evaporate and dry.

After just a few moments, Cloud's voice broke the silence.

"Love you too,"

Author's notes: Well, I really like it, I took only one day to write this, probably just about four hours, but only because I was IMing at the same time. I'm quite proud of this, even though it didn't quite turn out the way that I wanted. By the way, this is only a one-shot, nothing more. I hope you enjoyed it! Comment are lufked!!!