Disclaimer for whole story: I am not JK Rowling. Whew. Now that I got that off my chest, we can continue...
Chapter 1- Loverboy
There were times when Rose Weasley wished she were an only child. Not even just an only child, but an only child of only children; that way she could be guaranteed no annoying, meddling cousins. Although as she stood in an empty room one January morning, she reflected she just might get her wish, or at least be one cousin less. For Rose Weasley was seeing red. And when Rose Weasley saw red, the whole world turned.
"You will die James Sirius Potter!!" Rose screeched as she pelted items at her cousin. James ducked as quills, spellbooks, newspapers and binders flew past his head. "You will die a slow, painful, excruciating, vicious death and I will stand here and laugh at you!"
James lunged to the right as a copy of Hogwarts, a History 2nd Edition came barreling at him, barely missing his ear. He managed to sidestep the cushions thrown in his direction and tried to hide behind one of the round tables. "Is that the thanks I get for helping you? Look, I said I was sorry. Besides, I thought you'd be happy to get a chance to be in the same area as 'Loverboy'."
"Stop calling him that!" screeched Rose as she spied another cushion on the ground and threw it at him. The pillow hit him in the face but didn't do much harm. Rose then grabbed a nearby vase and James -knowing his cousins strong arm- jumped up from the ground and managed to barricade himself behind one of the chairs before he heard the crash.
"Stop calling him what? Loverboy? I thought that's what you call him. I hear you talking with Kara," he continued, edging her on while still managing to stay hidden, "Oh Tony, oh my Loverboy, oh Tony."
"AAAHHH!" It was apparently possible for Rose to look even more infuriated with him. Grabbing her wand she pointed it at James, "Impe…"
Rose jumped and looked towards the door where three teenagers stood with identical expressions of shock on their faces, staring at the scene in front of them. For a moment the room was silent until Albus spoke.
"Are my eyes deceiving me? Is this my favorite cousin, a Gryffindor prefect, Gryffindor Keeper, first in her year, brandishing a wand at another student? At her own cousin, my perfect, darling older brother? Oh the horrors, oh the scandal, oh the…"
"Shut up Al." Scorpius stepped forward, his eyes traveling throughout the room and taking in the assortment of objects and furniture thrown in disarray around James. He stopped when he reached Rose. Taking in the murderous expression on Rose's face he sighed. "What have you done now James?"
"Me?" A disgruntled James rose from behind the chair and pushed his jet black hair out of his eyes, "Why in the bloody hell does everyone assume that I'm the problem causer? Maybe this isn't my fault. Ever thought about that?"
"Yes; like the flying rats during Transfiguration weren't your idea, the fact that everyone's shoes except yours stuck to the floor during Apparition had NOTHING to do with you, the odd, disgusting smell that followed Brian Lackey around for two weeks after he knocked you off your broom during practice that nobody, not even Madam Pomfrey could get rid off was not YOUR fault….." Albus ticked his fingers off as he went down the list.
"Ok, Ok," James interrupted Albus, not wanting him to spill all his past transgressions. "I think we heard enough. I think I'll just get out of here now. Although," here James leveled a look at his younger cousin, "Maybe I can wait until she apologizes to me."
"Apologize to YOU??" Two spots of red appeared on Rose's cheeks as she stared at her cousin, wondering how anyone as smart as her aunt and uncle could have ever produced such an idiot as him. "Why should I apologize to you!? You're the one that embarrassed me in front of Tony Shiba!"
"Tony Shiba!" The girl that had appeared in the doorway along with Scorpius and Albus gave a shrill squeak of surprise and ran to Rose's side. "You talked to Tony Shiba?? Tony Shiba? THE Tony Shiba?! AAAHHHH!! When, where, what did he say?? Tell me, tell me. I cannot believe you actually talked to him!!"
Kara Gosselin clutched at Rose's hand, looking as if Christmas had come early this year. Rose had to suppress a chuckle as she watched her friends' face light up. Tony Shiba was a seventh year who, along with her older cousin, wore the crown of popularity. Tall, dark and handsome, he was every girl's dream and every father's worse nightmare.
"Tony Shiba didn't say anything to me. Thanks to James, all he was doing was laughing."
"What? Why?" Kara whirled around so she could stare at James, her face askew in bewilderment.
"Yeah and I'm still mad at him, so he can forget about an apology from me. He should just be thankful you lot showed up before I hexed him to eternity and back."
James grinned mischievously, knowing exactly what he should do next. Pulling a piece of paper from his robe pocket he waved it in the air, "Then I guess you don't care if I show them this. I mean, seeing on how you were planning to hex me and all."
Rose made a lunge at her cousin, trying to grab the paper but it was to no avail. James held it over her head and passed it to Scorpius and Albus. Scanning the paper quickly both boys started to laugh. Scorpius looked at Rose with a bemused expression on his face. "You wrote this?"
Rose started to blush. "I wrote it during second year. I was only thirteen."
"What?" Kara had stayed by Rose's side during this time and was now straining to look at the parchment. "What does it say?"
Scorpius and Albus looked at each other and grinned. In unison they read,
"Tony Shiba has eyes that can melt butter
Eyes as dark as a stormy night
And a smile that could break down a door
His lips are as red as roses
And should only kiss a Rose"
Scorpius and Albus could barely keep the laughter out of their voices as they finished the poem. James had given up all pretenses of grown up soberness and was now sitting on the floor, holding his stomach as he laughed. Rose sneaked a look at Kara and saw to her surprise that even Kara had a slight smile on her face. Frustrated with the lot of them Rose walked over to the two boys and ripped the paper out of their hands.
"So you think this is funny?" Ignoring the nods of the three boys she continued, "Well I don't think so."
"Oh but Rose," Albus voice displayed a hint of a chuckle, "Are my lips as red as roses also? Or perhaps they remind you of berries." The three boys dissolved into laughter again, much to the dismay of Rose.
"I told you, I was only 13!!" cried Rose in dismay, trying to convince her cousins and best friend but it was no good. The boys were too busy laughing with each other and mocking her to pay much attention to the girl standing in front of them, her hands on her waist.
"Come on Rose, let's go." Kara tugged on her arm to gain her attention. Kara alone had heard the frustration in her friend's voice and knew that Rose was close to breaking point. As Kara pulled Rose towards the door, she flicked her wand and all of the spellbooks, quills and binders zoomed into Rose's book bag as the furniture returned to their rightful positions too. Placing the book bag on her shoulder she managed to push her irate friend out the door.
As they exited James called after them, "Hey Rose, don't shut the door. I would hate to ask Tony to use his lethal smile." Rose could hear their shouts of laughter as she and Kara walked down the hall. If looks could kill, then Hogwarts would have been three students less that night.