AN: So...uh...hey guys. Lol ok yeah I know. Wtf man, wtf. But, yeah. I was looking through my stuff and was like, "omg nostalgia." Hahaha yeah. So sorry, whoever is still following this forsaken story. I WILL FINISH THIS DAMNIT. I want to before college starts. Yeah, I got into college. WHOOO! Anyway I should be writing again. I actually read through the story (omg so many mistakes lkasdjhfalds;h) and was like...mmm I'll finish this. So here we go guys. Here we go. Also sorry if there are a lot of mistakes. I kind of did this at like seven in the morning before I work and finished at ten, then tried to edit. Tell me if there are mistakes.
My body felt heavy as we rode back to Kenny's. My head was spinning and I could almost feel the bruises forming on my back. I knew if my parents found out I'd be grounded for sure. Jeez, I wish Eric wasn't so heavy; maybe the pain wouldn't have been as bad. I doubt it though. He probably would have tricked someone heavier to stand on me.
The quiet in the car was suffocating me. I wish the windows worked. Kenny really needs to fix his radio. Or maybe I shouldn't be so awkward. Yeah, it's probably my fault. Jeez, talk Butters! I don't think I even thanked him yet. Before I knew it I felt myself slipping into sleep when Kenny's voice jolted me into awareness. When had I gotten so tired?
"Butters, are ya ok? I mean… I'm sorry I didn' get there sooner. God, if I see that fatass again I'll fuckin'… I'll… GAH! I can' even think! It's just… I don' like seein' ya hurt, Butters."
He was so confusing. He helped me, right? So, why should he be sorry? It was my fault for not doing the essay on time after all. Stupid Butters! Gosh, I can't do anything right. Even a stupid essay is too big a feat for stupid Butters. I rubbed my knuckles and looked ahead. What do you say in a situation like this? 'Thanks for saving me from imminent death, but it was kind of my fault anyway, so don't feel sorry?' That seems pretty good. Oh golly, my back hurts. It's really hard to stay awake right now. I blinked sleepily and ended up staying silent. Leaning against the car door I muttered some jumbled words even I didn't understand. I can't think right now.
"Hey, Butters, don' be fallin' asleep on me here. Ya need to stay awake. C'mon, Butters. Hey! C'mon, answer me. Ya alive? Should I be takin' ya to a hospital or somethin'?"
Oh, sweet Jesus, no! If I went to the hospital they would call my parents and I'd get grounded even longer. I shouldn't even be going to Kenny's. Maybe this was a bad idea after all.
"N-no… I mean yes… I-I mean… it's fine. 'M just…sleepy…is all."
I was so tired and the car's movements were rocking me to sleep. But, I couldn't go to sleep yet. I should finish that essay. Oh… I haven't even started mine yet. What was it on again? I can't remember. My head hurts. I looked out the window and watched the road go by, but it ended up making me dizzier. My stomach churned and I could feel the rise of something in my throat. My mouth began to water. Oh, no…
"Kenny, st-stop. I…I think I'm going to …"
Suddenly, I was vomiting everywhere. Ok, well, maybe not everywhere. But it came so suddenly I couldn't stop it. My throat burned from the acid crawling up my esophagus and my eyes watered. Oh, God. I messed up Kenny's car. Oh, geez. Oh, sweet Jesus. What do I do? I can't stop. Ugh, it hurts. I heard Kenny curse and felt the car swerve to the right. The car was parked and I could feel his body turn towards me. He was going to scold me; I just know it. Probably throw me out of the car. I deserve it though. I can't even keep from throwing up in someone else's car. God, I'm just a failure in all aspects. I can't even control my own body!
"Jesus, Butters! Are ya okay?"
He frantically took off his seatbelt and climbed over me, nearly destroying his door trying to get it open. He led my head out the door and began to rub circles on my back. I don't even remember eating anything. Oh, wait. I didn't. I ended up staying in the bathroom with Kenny all lunch. I couldn't get my eyes to stay open, but I could feel the tears falling from them. Stop being such a girl! Kenny kept rubbing my back and whispering soft encouragements into my ear. I'd find this almost romantic if I weren't puking out my soul. Not that I want it to be. Not at all. Really. Finally, I felt the nausea that hit me leave and I stopped throwing up, merely gagging slightly. I wiped my mouth and sat in a daze. My head still hurts.
"Ken'…'m s-sorry for the mess."
Gosh, eloquent as always, Butters.
"Ah, it's fine. Really. Are ya okay? Did ya smack yer head? Hold on…"
He felt my skull for any injuries. I flinched when he touched the back. Ow.
"Is this where it hurts? Ya could have a concussion, ya know? We really should take ya to the hospital."
I don't want to go to the hospital. I just want to go to his apartment and sleep. I tried shaking my head, but it made me dizzy. Oh, hamburgers. It was hard to speak any sense, but I managed to get the words out.
"No, no. Please, I don't want to be a b-bother. I'm fine. Lets just go. Please."
He looked unconvinced, but sighed and closed the door when I stuck my head back in. The smell was making me nauseas again. God, why didn't the windows work?
"Well…okay, if ya insist. Hopefully ya wake up tomorrow."
The rest of the drive was uneventful besides me gagging over the smell. We finally reached his apartment near the other side of the tracks. The poor side of town. My heart raced a little. What if we got mugged or something? I couldn't fight back in this condition. Not that I would, my mom says it's better to just let it happen and that those people will get their punishment in Hell. That's not to say I wouldn't get grounded for not defending myself, but I'd rather be grounded than dead. Well, I had Kenny here, so maybe I would be okay. He could beat up those nasty hobos. He pulled up to a large apartment building made of concrete. It looked pretty rundown and…were those bars on the windows? I could hear the faint sound of a baby crying somewhere and two people hollering at each other. Kenny got out of the car and walked to my side, opening my door for me.
"Here we are. Home, sweet home. Do ya need help gettin' out?"
I tried to get out without his help, but ended up staggering like a drunkard. Kenny caught me before I fell and held me to him. My breathing was ragged and I felt like I just ran a mile. My face heated up and I held my face to his chest breathing in his scent. God, I'm such a pervert. We started towards the building and left all our school stuff in the car. I figured I could try and finish my homework at school. I get there pretty early anyway.
"I'm on the 5th floor and the elevators not workin'. I mean, it says it is, but trust me, fallin' down an elevator shaft is really terrifyin'. I'll give ya a piggy back ride up, if ya want?"
I was inclined to say no, but… guys. Five flights of stairs. No way, José. I slightly nodded and said nothing as I jumped on his back. I still felt pretty dizzy and my vision swam a little at the movement. I clinged to him desperately trying not to fall. He put his arms under me and I wrapped my arms around his neck. The warmth of his body surrounded me and I got drowsy. I felt like an 8 year old again. Not that I did this back then. I didn't really have anyone to do this with, but I saw a lot of other kids do it with their friends and sort of envied their closeness. At least I finally get to experience it; however, I wish it were under different circumstances.
"Okay, hold on. Here we go."
The trip up was a long one. Kenny had to take periodic breaks, but he made it all the way up and only sweat a little. Golly, he's really strong. I wonder if he works out. I could feel his back muscles through his sweatshirt and blushed. Stop it, Butters! Quit perving on your friends! He gently placed me down and fished his keys from his pocket. Room 519. I tried storing the number just in case, but ended up getting a bigger headache. I'll just write it down later. He opened his door and led me inside. The room was…quaint. Really small. The kitchen was just to the right of us as we walked in and the dining room table to the left, leaving a space in the middle that led to the living room. It wasn't too small, enough for a ragged, brown couch and a small television leaving a space in between them to lay down if you wanted. I could see a stand next to the right side of the couch where a lamp was. Hoo boy, what an ugly lampshade. Instead of a wall, there was a veranda with a sliding glass door. From the living room next to the left side of the couch was a small doorway that lead to a tiny hallway. Turn left and you were in Kenny's bedroom; turn right, the bathroom. There was a closet in the middle that had a washer and dryer in it. It wasn't big, but it was cozy. I felt really safe here, despite the poor neighborhood.
"I-I like your place, Kenny."
He looked less than convinced.
"Riiiiight. Well, are ya hungry? Or, maybe tired? I mean, it's only 5 pm, but ya seem pretty tired. Actually, is it okay to let ya sleep? Maybe not…I should look that up."
He looked really embarrassed as he rambled on. He must not let a lot of people over. He kept fidgeting and hopped from one foot to the other. There was a slight blush on his cheeks and he kept looking around. I smiled a little. So, Kenny could get embarrassed, too? Despite the slightly cute appearance he had I didn't understand what was so embarrassing. He paid for this all on his own with his job. He should be proud of it. Sure it wasn't Martha Stewarts home, but…it was home for him. His home. I walked to him and placed my hand on his shoulder.
"Th-thank you, Kenny."
He instantly stopped and blushed harder. I smiled at him and placed a small kiss on his cheek. Hey, it was the least I could do for all he did for me, right? When I pulled back I could see his eyes had gotten wide and his mouth was gaping. Oh, gosh, maybe I did something wrong. Poo, Butters, now you're going to be kicked out. Jeez.
"Ah… s-sorry. Did I…"
Before I could finish I felt him grab my arms and pull me towards him, enveloping me in a bone-crushing hug. The bruises I had stung and my back was killing me, but I didn't have the heart to tell him to let me go. Besides, this was kind of nice, beside the numbing pain it brought. I just laid my head on his shoulder and we stayed like that for a while. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders and closed my eyes, just letting myself feel him. I could get use to this… even if I did go to Hell.
"I'm sorry, Butters. So, so sorry. Forgive me. Please."
Okay. Now I'm confused. I heard a sniffle and felt a wetness on my shoulder. Was Kenny…crying? Oh, hamburgers, what did I do? What should I do? What can I do? His shoulders shook with silent sobs and I couldn't do anything but stand there like an idiot and keep hugging him. Why the heck was he crying?
"Uhh…K-Kenny? Um. Are…are you okay? Kenny? I don't understand. Wh-why are you sorry? I mean…I just don't get it."
He paused and I felt him stiffen a little. He pulled away from me, but I kept my arms around him. His eyes were slightly bloodshot and his face was blotchy from the crying. I felt a bit guilty. This was my fault, somehow. I wanted to kiss his face again, but refrained. I mean, isn't that why he started crying in the first place?
"I-I didn' protect ya when I said I would. That fat fuck hurt ya so bad and I wan' there. Please, forgive me. I promise to always protect ya. Please. I can'… I just can' deal with ya bein' hurt. Butters, promise me if somethin' like this happens again you'll tell me. Promise. Please, Butters. Ya have ta."
Oh, jeez. If that's all it was of course I'll promise that. Phew, hoo boy, I thought he was sore at me for kissing him.
"Of course, Kenny. I'll tell you i-if it happens again. B-but hopefully it won't. Even if it does, I know you'll b-be there, right?"
I smiled at him and watched as he smiled back. My heart fluttered at the smile and I could feel my stomach tie itself in knots. What the heck is wrong with me? He leaned in and I let him. I didn't fight it as I felt his lips touch mine and closed my eyes to absorb the feeling. He pushed a bit harder and held it there, too tentative to try anything else. I was glad and disappointed at the same time. I tightened my arms around him and he did too, mindful of my battered body. I thought my heart was going to burst; it was beating so fast. He pulled away and I kept my eyes closed, trying to remember the feel of the kiss. My cheeks were hot and I could feel my palms sweating. He moved forward in again and, this time, I met him halfway. I allowed him to push further in, even instigating the passionate kiss by tracing his lips with my tongue. My gosh, sexual deviant Butters, here. His probing one slipped in and explored every inch, leaving no crevice untouched. I could hardly breath and something in my lower belly stirred to life, yet I couldn't find myself caring. My parents' angry faces flashed through my mind, but I pushed them away and concentrated on the sensation of Kenny's tongue in my mouth. If this is what kissing is like we can do this all the time. He ended it, panting as he pulled back.
"Shit, Butters. Just…wow."
Then words I never should have said, ever, slipped from my mouth. I mean… I guess it was just in the moment.
"Want to help me shower?"