The disclaimer saying that I don't own any Galaxy Rangers characters is off holding hands somewhere. Just a little drabble that ran through my mind after watching 'Queen's Lair' again. Once again from Shane's point of view.
Hold My Hand
Supertroopers aren't supposed to be afraid.
Comfort, compassion, tenderness…Those are concepts alien to us.
Who could worry about a super soldier whose only purpose is to fight and die in battle?
You'd be surprised. I sure was.
I remember the time we blew up the Queen's space gun. That was a rough mission. Nearly got us all killed. We barely escaped the Queen's guard and getting blown up only to be stuck on a ship that only had five minutes of oxygen in it.
Zach was saying how proud he was of us, but those were just empty words. Hey we did a job we had to do and if we had to die to save the Earth then that was the way it was. I'd faced death too many times before to be afraid of it.
That was when Niko did something very unexpected.
She leaned over and put her hand on mine. Giving it a light squeeze.
I wasn't sure why she did that at first. Then I realized by looking in her eyes she was trying to give me a little bit of comfort. I wasn't sure if she was looking for any herself until I looked again.
Niko's far too tough a lady to break down like that. She doesn't go looking for someone's arms to fall in or cry for help. She can stand on her own two feet.
The look in her eyes was strong and serene. Like she had accepted her own death without question. It was sad. But still…
She held my hand as an act of compassion.
To give me some sort of human contact before the end. To let me know that I wasn't alone. That she would stand by me in my hour of need.
No one ever held my hand like that before. Not even Darkstar or Max.
No wait…Someone did. A long time ago. I don't really remember much…I barely remember it at all. I don't know who or when. It was as if it was in a dream. It's more like a feeling that someone did care enough about me to hold my hand for a while. A strong gentle touch to keep the darkness at bay. But whoever it was it was so long ago…
This was different than that. I felt…strange. We were about to die. Actually I probably could have held out longer than the others if I used my bio-defenses. I once survived the vacuum of outer space for about three minutes. So I suppose when the air ran out I would have been the only one to make it.
Niko probably knew that. And yet, she held my hand to comfort me.
I never said anything about that but I always thought about it. Lucky for us the space navy picked us up with four minutes of air to spare.
Niko never said anything about that moment. I guess to her it was no big deal.
To me…I thought about it to myself for a long time. It was strange for me. For someone to be worried about me. I didn't need it. I didn't ask for it.
And yet it felt comforting.
Just that small gesture made me feel…Human. But in a good way.
Strange. All my life I was taught that simply being human was a bad thing. That it was a weakness for a Supertrooper. To want someone to take care of you meant that you were worthless and weak. But I didn't feel like that at all. I felt…better. A little stronger even.
Maybe what I was taught was wrong? Maybe being human, even a little human isn't so bad after all?
That we all have our weak moments but it takes others to help us stay strong.
That's another reason why I'm secretly glad I'm not like the other Supertroopers. They always thought that being part of a team made you weaker. Being forced to hold back or having others slow you down.
I know better now.
Being part of a team, a real team makes you stronger in ways I could have never imagined.
And having a friend like Niko…Taught me that's it's okay to be human. Sometimes anyway.
Some time later we had another rough mission. We had come back from beating the bad guys but we were all tired and drained. This particular mission had nearly exhausted Niko's psychic abilities, pushing her beyond her limits.
This time I took her hand and squeezed it.
She looked at me, her eyes clear and without fear or anger. But of understanding and acceptance.
I wanted to comfort her. To let her know that I would always stand by her.
I will always be there to hold her hand.