Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING!!
A/N: Okay, so I was going to make this story another fandom but seeing as how there arent enough Liley stories on here for my taste, here's another to the collection, I hope you enjoy!
A/N2: Alright, another note, this story DOES involve gay-bashing, but it is not in my own nature because I myself, am lesbian, but I have experienced several homophobic people and in no way do I mean to be cruel, but these things DO happen. If you find this offensive, go away, you've been warned!
A/N3: I was inspired to write this after watching Sweet Home Alabama for the 234354968720321013rd time last nite and watching the music video Mine All Mine by SheDaisy, lovely vid, check it out on Youtube even if you aren't into Country music: . I do not own rights to that song, and here's the story!
Sun kisses the windowsill and I am
still on my second cup of pity me
It's been a long night chasing ghosts
but at the most its been a rude awakening
-SheDaisy "Mine All Mine"
Lilly sat nervously waiting at an empty spot near Rico's, she noticed that the crowd was rather dull today, being a Tuesday, and she was thankful for that because she wasn't sure just how on Earth she was going to manage this. For months now Lilly had noticed she had been harboring thoughts that she shouldn't have been thinking... thoughts that involved her very best friend, Miley Stewart. She'd tried ignoring them and hoping they'd go away, but her attraction for them only grew as the months passed and she found it harder to be around Miley without wanting to kiss her like crazy. Miley and Oliver had both become worried about Lilly's withdrawals, she'd make excuses to not hang out after school, or what seemed to bug them both was how class projects now only involved them whereas Lilly would opt for someone else, Sarah, Becca, even Amber Dewitt one time in English. Anyone but Miley...
Lilly hadn't meant to make her best friend worry or even upset her, but she just couldn't take the secrecy anymore, Miley had trusted Lilly with her secret as Hannah, and now Lilly had to trust Miley AND Oliver with her secret, she flinched as she noticed them both walking upto her, By the Gods Miley looks gorgeous, Lilly thought to herself as she gave her best friend a once-over, Miley was wearing just a natural pair of denim blue jeans, a white v-neck t-shirt and a silky silver scarf looped around her belt line, blowing softly in the breeze, her chestnut curls were let loose to her shoulders and framed her perfect porcelain face. Argh! Snap out of it, Truscott, you have a job to do.
"Hey Lils,"Oliver smiled. "Long time no see, whats goin on?"
"Take a seat,"Lilly said sternly, taking her eyes from Miley and instead focusing in on her hands which were wringing together nervously. She noticed that Oliver was speaking to her and she looked up dumbly. "Huh?"
"I said... you told us to meet you here because you had something to tell us?"he asked again, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion.
"Oh... right, well-"Lilly cleared her throat. God why must this be so hard? She wrung her hands again, and then nearly jumped out of her skin when she felt a warm hand clasp her wrist, Miley's hand. Miley shrunk it back nervously when Lilly reacted and gave her a sheepish apologetic look,"Look... I-I know you guys have been worried lately, and I know I haven't been myself,"Lilly coughed, feeling the heat rise to her cheeks, she focused on her hands again and didn't dare look up, she could feel her best friends' stares piercing her, moreso Miley's blue than Oliver's brown. "And I just want you both to know, that I am fine... and that the reason I've been so moody lately is because... I- IthinkImightbegayandIdidn'twantyouguystofreakout,"Lilly rushed. She dared a glance up to see two shocked dumb expressions.
"Come again, Lils? I didn't quite catch that..."Oliver said. Lilly felt her cheeks burn and scanned his eyes for a moment to make certain he wasn't mocking her.
"I said.. that I think..no I know that I like girls,"Lilly's voice dwindled to a whisper and tears began to sting the backs of her eyes.
"Wow, Lils, that took a lotta guts, but ya know, I dont care,"Oliver said after a moment, Lilly's eyes shot up and she saw the comforting smile from him and it made her give out a laugh of relief. Miley was still sitting there looking stricken and a bit embarrassed,
"Miley?"Lilly asked, her voice tinged with fear, she was worried how her southern popstar friend would take this, not only because she needed Miley like she needed air to breathe, but because Miley's reaction would give her the go-ahead to whether or not Lilly ever had a chance.
"Lilly, I-"Miley cleared her throat. "I think thats great, but, I mean, are you sure?" Lilly pondered the obvious look of concern on Miley's face for a moment,
"Miley, I cant help it, I've tried dating boys, and.. I just dont feel anything there, I mean, sure some are cute, but I dont think I want to spend the rest of my life with a man..."Lilly paused, gauging Miley's reactions, but they stayed neutral.
"Well, I guess its okay with me, I mean- its not my cup of tea, but-"Lilly's ears went deaf through the rest of the sentence as her world shattered around her. Miley didn't show any signs that she may feel the same way about girls...
Of course she doesn't you dope, she dated that moron Jake Ryan for crying out loud! Lilly blinked away the tears and gave a brave smile.
"Well, as long as we're all still friends?"Lilly asked, uncertain. Oliver placed his hand on Lilly's with a warm smile,
"Deffinitely, we've been friends forever, and its not about to change, now if you start dating Amber or Ashley, I may be concerned,"Lilly and Oliver laughed. Miley gave a weak smile and put her hand on Lilly's arm. Lilly cursed her inhibitions as goosebumps arose but smiled at Miley and then stood. They gave each other group hugs and Lilly took the moment to cherish her friends for being there, she took a small whiff of Miley's citrus-y shampoo before the three friends broke up and Oliver headed off to the beach to scan the waves. Miley stood uncomfortably in front of Lilly and Lilly felt that pit of fear engulf her once more as her heart hammered in her chest.
"Listen, Miles, if you have something to say... I just want you to know that you can, I dont want this to come inbetween our friendship,"Lilly felt her voice hitch at the sudden fear that Miley may have only been kind to her because Oliver was there. But those thoughts diminished as Miley shook her head and gave Lilly a weak smile,
"Lilly, you were the first person to befriend me when I got to Malibu, you were the first person to learn AND keep my secret, and you've never bailed on me, I'm not gonna bail on you, friends til the end,"she smiled. Lilly practically leaped for joy and hugged Miley, but felt Miley's form stiffen under her and she released her best friend and decided that Miley may need a bit of time to digest the news.
"So I'll see you tommorow?"Lilly asked. Miley nodded and gave Lilly a soft smile,
"Bright and early."
Miley walked away to her house, not even bothering to turn back and wave. Lilly watched her go, and felt suddenly, this may be a bit harder than she thought.
School went by pretty quickly the rest of the week as Lilly finally began to hang out with Miley and Oliver more, however, Lilly noticed that Miley was still slightly distancing herself from Lilly and it made her heart sink lower in her chest with each passing glance that Miley averted, or simple touches that suddenly made Miley jump away. Lilly became a bit angrier when Satruday night came and Miley had a Hannah concert and didn't bother to tell Lilly, when they had already planned a sleepover weeks before, instead, Lilly arrived at an empty house and then saw on the news that night where Hannah was hanging out at another after-concert party with Tracy and a few other celebrities.
Early Sunday evening, Lilly skated over to the Stewart residence in order to figure out what had been going on with Miley, despite the obvious that made fear bubble in Lilly's stomach to the point where she wanted to vomit, she had to get to the bottom of this. She walked in through the open glass doors and saw Mr. Stewart strumming on his guitar,
"Well, hey there Lilly, Miley's up in her room,"Robbie Ray pointed up the stairs and Lilly thanked him briefly before taking the stairs two at a time and then coming up to a closed bedroom door, that was odd, Miley almost never closed her door unless she was either changing or trying to avoid Jackson, Lilly knocked either way and heard no response, she turned the knob and thanked Miley silently when she found it unlocked, she opened the door and came across the most adorable sight...
Miley curled up on top of her covers, clad in the Happy Bunny pajama bottoms that Lilly had gotten her for her last birthday and a tank top, her hair pulled back into a messy bun, pillow clutched tightly to her chest, a barely audible snore coming from her as her chest rose and fell evenly while she slept. Lilly had seen her best friend sleep before, of course, on their sleepovers, but she'd never really taken the time to watch, it made her almost feel like a stalker. Lilly instead sat on the edge of the bed and gave a small smile as she lifted a few stray hairs from Miley's face and watched her eyes move beneath the lids as she dreamt. A small moan caught Lilly's attention and she wondered for a brief moment what Miley was dreaming, or who she was dreaming of... Get a grip, there's no way she'd ever dream of you... not in that way at least, Lilly sighed. Once or twice a week now Lilly would awaken in a cold sweat, her body on fire from an erotic dream that was lead on by the sight of her best friend, and it embarrassed her, but at the same time, the guilty pleasure won out and Lilly would finish the job herself before succumbing to another uneasy slumber.
She was so lost in her own thoughts that she hardly noticed Miley's eyes twitch faster and another moan come out, this time, strangled, as if she were fighting someone in her sleep.
"Miley?"Lilly whispered. Miley whimpered again and this time thrashed to her other side, releasing the pillow and groaning, trying to get away from the invisible demons that Lilly could not see. "Miley shh, its okay,"Lilly whispered, Miley still continued to grunt in protest as she began thrashing. Lilly caught one of Miley's wrists before it nearly uppercutted her jaw and she tried to restrain her friend who seemed a lot more powerful than Lilly or Oliver gave her credit for...and she says that she's no good at anything in gym... I bet this girl could take out Coach if we ever did wrestling,Lilly thought as she struggled to keep Miley at bay. Miley's throat released a soft, strangled cry and Lilly decided to do the only thing she thought of, her mother used to sing to her whenever she had a bad dream and according to her, it always soothed her conscience.
"My loss, my lonely
My mistake, mine only,
Mine all, Mine all mine...
and its my bad my broken
All my should haves left unspoken
Mine all, mine all mine,"
Lilly sang the verse to a SheDaisy song she'd heard on the radio the same day that she had come out to Miley and Oliver that made her realize that no matter what happened in this life, whether she got the girl of her dreams or not, it was upto her, she couldnt put the blame on anyone else. She gave a soft, yet sad smile as Miley seemed to calm down from the nightmare, and also noticed that Miley's hand had subconsciously held onto hers like an anchor and now wouldn't let go. What does Mr. Stewart feed this girl? Lilly sighed as she tried another failed attempt at getting her hand back before deciding that Miley may let it go soon so she gave into waiting, twisted around and settled back against the pillows and kicked off her shoes, no sooner she did that did Miley's other arm suddenly wrap around her waist and she felt her heart jump out of her chest as Miley snuggled into her side, her face burying into the crook of her neck, the soft hot breath from her best friend making her skin tingle and she shivered, a leg draped around Lilly's own kept her from moving any further as she became Miley's personal teddybear.
This will be akward... please wake up, Miley..
Scratch that, dont wake up, turn over and stay asleep, let me leave and THEN wake up...
Lilly continued to battle internally as she debated whether or not to wake Miley up and explain this predicament or let Miley sleep it off and hopefully Miley would let her go... God she is so soft though, and warm and- STOP IT TRUSCOTT! She's your best friend! Lilly scolded herself mentally but calmed down as she heard Miley's soft whimper of approval and felt the soft body of her best friend settle into her for the night...This wont end well.
Lilly awoke to the sweet smell of citrus and a rather familiar scent that was...Miley! Lilly's eyes snapped open as she found herself spooned up against Miley's backside, her arm around Miley's waist, held in place by Miley's arm, her entire front practically melted to fit against Miley's back and her face buried in luxurious rich browl curls. She felt Miley's chest rising and falling evenly and deduced that Miley was still asleep. Glancing at the clock, it was six AM, it was also Monday which meant that Miley's alarm would be going off in fifteen minutes. Easy does it, Truscott, Lilly thanked the Gods silently as she was able to finally slip out from Miley's grasp and quietly grabbed her shoes and checked her phone, she'd missed three calls from her mother and was worried now that the police would be all over Malibu searching. She watched regretfully and froze as Miley's sleep-ridden form turned over and reached for the warmth that had just left the bed, Lilly's lips turned up in a small smile as Miley's hand grasped the pillow her head had just been on and wrapped her arms around it, snuggling into the warmth and giving a slight shiver. Lilly grasped the blanket and wrapped it around Miley's body, smiling wider as Miley snuggled further into it, smiling unconsciously, she took a chance and leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to Miley's cheek sadly before she left the room.
Lilly was just barely able to make it into the classroom before the bell rang, she didn't get the chance to shower, just ran home and change, thankful that her mom wasn't there to badger her about her whereabouts, she grabbed a banana and had skated off to school as fast as she could, nearly getting hit by a car twice. She took her seat next to Miley, who looked absolutely refreshed and more beautiful than ever, her hair pulled back into a simple ponytail, Lilly sighed and wondered if Miley knew anything about last night, Mr. Stewart would have known if Lilly'd left, what if he'd seen them and thought...Oh hell, the teacher came in and began instructing, taking Lilly away from her thoughts. Miley did not bother to even speak to Lilly at all, making her even more nervous, until the end of second period before lunch.
"Hey Lilly, Dad told me you came by yesterday?"Miley asked. Lilly froze at her locker as she put her books away,
"Uhh...yeah, I-I didn't stay long, you were asleep-"Lilly cringed. Great, her dad probably mentioned that, too.
"Oh, well, listen I wanted to ta-"
"Lilly Truscott?"two girls walked upto Lilly and Miley. One was a bit heavyset with dyed black hair and heavy makeup, wearing dark clothes and tight jeans and an anarchy wristband, the other girl was redheaded with bright green eyes and freckles lining her face, a kind smile.
"Who wants to know?"Lilly asked, worried.
"Listen, we... we kinda heard through the grapevine that you were..ya know,"the dark girl said, raising her eyebrows in clarification.
"No, I dont know, why dont you enlighten me?"Lilly felt the heat rise to her cheeks, Miley just stood there staring between the girls and Lilly, confused.
"Forgive my friend, Lilly,"the redhead said kindly. "I'm Rebecca Chambers, this is Mary Griffin, we're trying to get more members to start a Gay-Straight Alliance here at the school, so far we have ten members and we were hoping that you and your girlfriend-"
"Pardon, but we're not girlfriends,"Miley clarified, blushing. Lilly felt her heart sink but straightened up, determined not to let anyone know about her true feelings,
"Oh, well, this group is for gays AND straights, we just wanted to tell you about it because your friend Oliver is helping out with gaining members for us as well and he told us that you'd probably be cool about it,"Mary said.
"Sounds pretty interesting, I'm in,"Lilly smiled kindly. Mary grinned and Rebecca gave a flirty grin and winked at Lilly.
"Cool, well, first meeting is tommorow after school, you just need to bring yourself, and bring some friends if you want, like we said, its for gays AND straights,"Mary said pointedly to Miley, who looked away rather embarrassed.
"Alright, see ya there,"Lilly smiled.
"See you,"Mary turned and walked away. Rebecca lingered for a moment before giving Lilly a once over then a wink and turned to walk off with Mary.
"Lilly, you cant go to that meeting,"Miley said worried. Lilly suddenly felt a tinge of anger toward Miley, here was her best friend and the secretive love of her life who'd been blatantly ignoring her all week long and then blatantly refused to tell her she had a concert the night they were supposed to have a sleepover and now she was telling her not to go somewhere?
"Miley, I dont think that you have any right to tell me what I can and cant do,"Lilly said pointedly as she walked to the cafeteria.
"Lilly, I'm serious, I've heard of these meetings, I'm all for you being gay but others aren't exactly as open, straight people join these sorts of things just so they can find out who the gays are and then they make their lives hell, I've seen people back in Tennessee get hurt bad for being open about these things-"
"And suddenly you care?"Lilly snapped. Miley froze. Lilly felt the anger bubble up and then flow through her veins like wildfire, she was hurt. "Miley, you have hardly said two words to me in a week, you ignored me Saturday, we were supposed to have a sleepover, remember?"Miley's eyes widened and she opened her mouth to speak but Lilly cut her off,"and you dont look at me, you wont hug me, I barely touch you and you flinch,"she made her point by grasping Miley's wrist and watching Miley snatch it away. "You treat me like a disease Miles, you act as if I'm going to destroy you, I'm still the same Lilly, I'm no different than I was when we first met, the only difference now is that I dont like boys, and now I may have a chance at meeting people who WILL treat me with some respect and you're telling me to stay away? Fat chance, Miles,"Lilly shot out, she felt a hint of regret at seeing the tears begin to blur Miley's vision, but she was still too angry to care.
"I just dont want to see you get hurt,"Miley choked out. Lilly scoffed, unbelievable!
"Well its too late for that, Miley, you've already hurt me far worse than anyone else in this world ever could! I dont even know why we're still friends!"Lilly regretted those words before they even came out of her mouth, Miley's eyes widened in fear.
"You dont mean that,"her voice cracked.
"What if I do?"Shut it, Truscott! Stop it now! Lilly wasn't listening to her heart, only her brain that was currently consumed with rage toward the girl who both owned and broke her heart. Miley said nothing, but her eyes were downcast, Miley nodded at the floor before she turned and walked away, not daring to glance back. Lilly looked on after her, each step away from Lilly making her anger ebb away and fear take over, Miley...please, dont leave..come back! It was too late, Miley had broken into a brisk walk and practically shot out of the school doors. Lilly stood alone in the hallway, wondering now, how on Earth she'd be able to fix this mess that she made...
A/N: You know the drill, read and review! More reviews, the faster the next chapter!