Last chapter. More about Snape than Draco.





Warnings for child abuse, language, rape, violence, self-harm, suicide, insanity, murder, character death and torture.

Remus, Dumbeldore, whoever it was, had finally given up and stopped banging on his door. They might have left hours ago, days ago for all Snape knew. He'd read the note a hundred times over. His fingers traced the signature at the end.

"You can't be dead... Please let this be a dream. Be alive. Please..."

Tears were flowing freely down his face, from eyes ringed by dark circles and sunken in skeletally.

He stared into the mirror, as though he expected his image to transform into the boy he talked to.

"Be here. Don't leave me like this..."

"Don't be gone..."

But he knew the truth. His godson no longer existed. Draco was dead.

Covering his face with his hands he whispered, "it's not fair."

"It's not fair!" he shouted, punching the mirror again and again, until only tiny shards remained and silvered glass was deeply embedded in his hand.

When the call came, a burning stinging in his arm, he stared at the dark mark for several minutes. Then, calmly he left his room, a manic grin plastered on his face.

He met Dumbeldore in the corridors.

"Severus! Where are you going."

"To a meeting."

"You're ill. How long has it been since you ate or slept? You need to see Madam Pomphrey."

"No. I have to go to the meeting now."

"Severus you're in no condition for that."

"Why do you care. I'm no use to you anymore."

The Death Eaters stood in a semi-circle around Voldermort. They turned when he appareted.

"You're late Sseverusss," came the hissing voice. "Come bow before your masster."

He seemed to consider for a moment. Then very calmly he replied, "no."


The pain was impossible, seemed to last for an eternity. But it didn't matter anymore. Finally the agony faded.

"What did you ssay Sseverusss?"

"I said no, I'm not crawling on the dirt to kiss the hem of your robe you disgusting excuse for a human being."


He held the curse for far too long.

Snape struggled to breath.

"Thisss isss not expectable Sseverusss."

"Go fuck yourself Riddle. I despise you." With effort his lifted his head, looked straight into grey eyes. "But not as much as I hate you Lucious." Back to Voldermort. "How could you ever believe I supported your cause?"

"Do you mean to tell me that you are a traitor Sseverusss?"

"Eight hours after I took your mark I turned myself in. What did you expect? Even if I had no conscience did you think I'd be grateful to be treated like a punch bag and a whore?"

"It's more than you desserve mudblood sscum."

He smiled. "You're halfblood too Riddle."

Voldermort grimaced. On his order each of the deatheater raised their wands and pointed them at Severus.


He could feel his screams ripping his throat apart.

'Why did you have to die Draco? This world is a horrible place. But you could have been ok. Why did you have to give up?'



Kicks and punches.



"Tell me about the order."


Voldermort's eyes were cold and terrifying. "Luciousss."

Snape knew the shaking of his limbs was caused by more than the curses.

The leader of the dark wizards smiled. "Have fun."

As the blond wizard approached him Severus' breathing became rapid. He knew what was coming.

His wrists were held together with one hand. His legs were pinned down and forced apart with Lucious'. Malfoy kissed him possessively, bruising his lips, biting down so hard they bled. A delicate silver knife cut through his robes. Aggressively a hand moved across his body. He felt sick. Then Lucious forced his way inside.

He finished, left Severus on the ground bloodstained and curled into a ball.

"I will give you a chance Sseverusss," he smiled a reptilian smile, "if you repent."

Snape took a slow breath, held it. "Fuck you Riddle."



"You can sstop this Sseverusss. I'll even let you live."

'Why would I want to do that?'

More curses.

More screaming, fading to hysterical laughter. The Dark Lord paused, uncertain. Finally he stopped laughing. Violent tremors shook his body. "At... at best you're idiots. At worst you're... you're all cowards."

Curses shouted in a dozen different voices at once.

Blows and knives.

Rough hands.

A young boy with white hair. He looks like an angel but his world is soaked to the core in darkness.

'Why, why couldn't you have lived?'

A broken child laughs at others before they could laugh at him, tells them they are worthless so that for a moment he might believe he wasn't.

"You're nothing Sseverusss."

"You were a fool to betray me."

"Tell me what you know or I'll make it sso the pain never sstopsss."

"I don't... care... what... you do... to me any... anymore Riddle."

The world was slipping into black mist.


"You're not going that eassily Sseveruss."

Two pairs of arms lifted him upright. He didn't struggle. He didn't care.


The green light growing at the top of Voldemort's wand was almost beautiful.

'I'm not afraid.'

'He's the one that's frightened.'

'It hurts so much.'

'Why did you have to die?'

'I'm so tired...'

'I can't do this anymore.'

'I wanted to save you.'

'Why did you have to die?'

'There's no reason to be afraid.'

'But it hurts so much that you're gone.'

'Why did you go?'

'You were the only reason I tried.'

'I'm so sorry I couldn't keep you safe.'

'You should have lived.'

'There's nothing left to fear now.'

'Only pain, no fear.'

'Why are you dead?'

'I can't do this anymore.'

'Why are you dead?'