Disclaimer: Inuyasha belongs to Rumiko Takahashi and I do not own any rights to this series. No copyright infringement is meant through this fanfiction.
Chapter 7- Awkward Moments
There is no use worrying about things over which you have no control, and if you have control, you can do something about them instead of worrying- Stanley C. Allyn
It had been two weeks. Two weeks since he had last looked at the two persons who he though were his friends, two weeks that he had eaten lunch by himself on the rooftop of the school, looking at the passing clouds. His thoughts were jumbled, uncertain. Betrayal often did that to a person, causing one to second guess everything and everyone. Even if the feeling of betrayal was still eminent, anger was the emotion that had overtaken his system, his mind. It was the kind of anger that Inuyasha thought that he had gotten rid of three years ago. He thought that it was something he had left behind when he had exited that picture perfect house. It was strange how emotions from the past still haunted his mind. It made him wonder if, for him, moving on was even possible.
Inuyasha had made his way up to the roof again. This time it was deserted due to the cold November weather. This made it even more suitable for Inuyasha since he could be alone with his thoughts. Kagome had not come up on the rooftop again. Inuyasha guessed that it was because she had missed her spot under the old tree. Subconsciously Inuyasha was somewhat disappointed. Talking to her was a nice change. She listening to him and did not speak unnecessarily like other girls. Inuyasha smirked when he recalled her facial expressions within the hour they had spent together. She had so many changing emotions. It was quite interesting to watch.
Of course he had seen the girl. She still tutored him once a week and both times that they had met since Inuyasha's experience with his friends, Inuyasha chose to be emotionally distant. He was still upset about the incident with Sango and Miroku and he guessed that Kagome sensed his anger. She barely spoke, only when necessary and when the session was over Inuyasha left without any further conversation.
He felt slightly bad about his attitude towards her but decided that what she felt was none of his concern.
Inuyasha breathed out a sigh and watched as his breath formed a tiny white cloud that quickly dissolved into the atmosphere. It really was near freezing but Inuyasha somehow found the atmosphere appealing. He knew that everyone would be inside because of the temperature, making indoors unappealing to him. He found the students within the school to be noisy and annoying. Being alone was better. He had attempted to convince himself of that notion without any success.
His thoughts were cut short when the sound of footsteps came into his range of hearing. Inuyasha did not make an attempt to sit up, instead he turned his head to the side to see who exactly it was. His eyes widened when he caught the sight of the girl with long raven locks and ocean blue eyes looking as equally surprised as him. It was Kagome
"Takahashi-san," Kagome whispered and immediately averted her eyes.
Inuyasha observed the lunch clutched firmly within her hand, along with her bag. She had obviously come here to eat and by the expression on her face, Inuyasha guessed that she was expecting the spot to be empty. He raised one eyebrow at the girl, wondering exactly why she was staring. Kagome flushed and turned away, obviously desiring to leave before the situation became any more awkward.
"Keh, sit down!"
"Eh?" Kagome said and turned around to face Inuyasha with a baffled expression held within her eyes.
"Don't you ever listen? You probably walked all the way here anyway. Sit down, I don't mind."
Kagome looked frozen for a moment. Apparently she too was as confused at the words that Inuyasha had just uttered as he was. Her body became noticeably tense before she took a seat next to Inuyasha on the floor. It almost felt like déjà vu from the last two weeks. Maybe this time she wasn't as hesitant was before.
She was quiet, typical Kagome. The emotionless mask was also present as well as she opened her lunch slowly. Inuyasha decided it best not to say anything and turned his attention back to the sky above him.
"Um… Takahashi-san," Kagome began in a soft voice. Inuyasha didn't bother to look at her. He however grunted to indicate that he was listening. He could almost imagine her looking at the ground before focusing her eyes on him once more right before she would speak. "Just know that I only came here because I wanted to, not that…" she paused as if she were attempting to collect her thoughts. Inuyasha didn't need to look at her to know that she had that defiant expression on her face. "Just don't misunderstand!" Kagome muttered finally.
His presence was soothing yet at the same time it made her feel completely uneasy. She had convinced herself that the rush of emotion that she had felt previously was nothing more than a confusion of the mind. Kagome had chastised herself before it occurred to her that she wasn't quite used to being around persons who were so… well who didn't bully her or attempt to use her in some way, less alone someone from the opposite sex. It was confusion on her part.
It was hushed for sometime. Inuyasha hadn't moved from his current position and with his back facing away from her, Kagome couldn't guess exactly what was on his mind.
"Did I ever do anything for you to think like that wench?" His voice was barely audible, so different from his regular harsh tone. Kagome unexpectedly felt ashamed of her own words. Why had she uttered them?
"Um… no not really…"
"Keh, you're weird," Inuyasha responded before Kagome could say anything else. Kagome was about to retaliate, in fact she had devised her insult within her mind beforehand but the words got stuck in her throat when golden eyes clashed with her sea blue orbs. Her lips remained slightly parted, speechless due to the sudden eye contact.
"How come you didn't go under that rotting tree today? You always seem to find yourself there," Inuyasha inquired as he looked at her.
Kagome's cheeks and lips were slightly red from the cold temperature. Her hair was different from usual, he noted. Instead of the loose, messy hair that he had grown accustomed to seeing, Kagome had opted to tie the raven tresses up into a messy bun. Strands of hair still fell in front of her face but he could tell that she had tried her best to tuck the loose strands behind her ears.
Kagome averted her eyes away from Inuyasha and impulsively closed them when a cold wind blew past them. She bit her lips lightly as her body dealt with the sudden chill before staring at the ground beneath her.
"I just wanted to come up here. It was nice the last time, although it's cold now," Kagome commented and found a smile slowly making its way on to her face. Kagome lightly shook her head when she became aware of her thoughts. "What about you, Takahashi-san? Why aren't you with your friends?"
Inuyasha face immediately darkened. It was almost as if Kagome had felt the anger radiating from his body. Kagome stared at him, wondering exactly what he was thinking. He turned away from her this time allowing her to only view his broad back.
Kagome arched one eyebrow and bit her lower lip. Had she said something wrong? She frowned when it became observable that he wasn't going to answer her question and that he was practically ignoring her presence. Annoyance washed over her attributed to Inuyasha's sudden mood swing. Just because he didn't want to answer her question, didn't mean that he should treat her as if she were a non- existent being.
The teenager frowned and turned her attention away from Inuyasha. She would simply eat her lunch without having conversation with him. Who needed a rude, arrogant, moody jerk that would suddenly invite her to sit with him and then decide to become uninviting towards her later on? He was the only person who irritated her so much with his antics. She normally ignored such person but with Inuyasha it was different. Why did being around him put her through such emotions?
"You'll get a line in the middle of your forehead if you keep that look on your face," Inuyasha suddenly said after about fifteen minutes of silence.
Kagome turned her head to look at him and found that his body was turned to face her once more. His golden orbs had that playful gleam within them that Kagome had oddly enough wished to see more of. Anything was better than that angry expression that his face usually gave off.
Kagome frowned down at him and lifted her head high, indicting her pride. Inuyasha knew an insult was most likely coming next. He was well prepared for it.
"Well I could say the same for you," Kagome commented. Inuyasha observed as her down-turned lips curved into a tiny smile. "You always have a sour expression on your face."
She looked absolutely captivating with a smile fitted on her pink lips. Inuyasha flushed lightly and turned away once again from her. He had noticed that her blue eyes held a playful gleam within them. This coupled with the long strands framing her face and her rose colored cheeks from the cold made her appear even prettier than usual. Inuyasha had to turn away due to embarrassment from his own thoughts.
"Keh," was his only response.
Sango frowned as the bell indicating the end of the lunch hour chimed throughout the school. She and Miroku had sat in the same spot braving the cold in hopes that Inuyasha would appear before them. This was another day that they would be disappointed.
During the past two weeks, Inuyasha himself had totally cut them out of his life. Sango had seen him around of course and despite Miroku's warnings she had attempted to communicate with him. Inuyasha on the other hand saw it fit to treat Sango as if she were a soft, fleeting wind passing by him. First, his golden eyes would meet her dark brown ones, and then the fire within them would build, throwing shooting arrows in her direction before he would walk away completely disregarding her presence.
It hurt her to know that he no longer saw her as a friend, that he no longer saw her. Miroku said to give Inuyasha time but it was nearly two weeks without communication. Shouldn't it be time for Sango to explain herself, to het him to understand?
"Let's go inside," Miroku said suddenly. Sango jumped as her thoughts were cut off. She looked down at her fingers which were digging into the white, plastic table. She wanted to wait a bit longer. It was Inuyasha after all; he could change his mind any minute.
"Sango," Miroku sighed and looked at her with a frown. He sensed her anxiety, her guilt about the entire situation. After all she was the one who was contacted first, but Miroku was the one who was willing to compromise. They were both guilty in this situation.
Without a second thought, Miroku rested his hand on her midnight black hair. Sango looked at him with surprised dark brown orbs and parted lips. He wasn't one to be affectionate in such a manner.
"It's cold," Miroku stated and ran his fingers through her silky tresses until his palm lightly touched her right shoulder. "Let's go inside."
Sango sighed and lowered her eyes down to the table once more. Her petite hands were trembling as they dug into the table.
Hai," she responded and was about to stand up when her cell phone interrupted the silence.
Trembling hands slowly reached for the gadget resting on the table before them. She grabbed the communication device and flipped it open to check the number. A feeling of dread instantly washed over her body when she identified who exactly was attempting to contact her.
Miroku's blue eyes met with her dark ones. He didn't need to ask who was calling or what exactly she was thinking. Her eyes said it all; her hesitant actions spoke to him. She lowered her eyes to look at the device as a tempest raged within her mind. Inuyasha's face flashed in her mind and remained there for a few moments. Her confusion with the entire situation was driving her crazy.
Gathering all her resolve Sango pressed the button to accept the call and pressed the phone to her left ear.
"Mama!" Kagome yelled when she arrived home.
The house was quiet. Souta had football practice so Kagome knew for certain that her little brother would not be home until late. Her mother on the other hand was supposed to be home. She would normally be greeted either by the door or her mother would be sitting happily in the living room watching television. Kagome frowned and made a beeline to Mrs. Higurashi's bedroom. It was possible that Mrs. Higurashi decided to rest for a while.
The room was tidy. It was uninhabited.
"Mama?" Kagome whispered. Her heart was picking up speed. Her breath was becoming short. She was going into panic mode.
Her body moved on its own. She padded down the stairs to once again arrive at the first floor. Her mother's name came out of her lips several times as her body easily maneuvered its way around the house at a rapid speed. She ignored her stumbling and kept moving around the house. Each time she called there was no response, no sound. The entire shrine compound was inharmoniously quiet. It felt like death and come over the household and had finally come for what it had been searching for.
She stopped in the kitchen and once again called out to her mother. It was the same response every time. Silence, deathly silence.
An ominous image was forming within her mind. She saw it clearly within her mind. The body was lying unmoving on the floor but it was different from the other times. It was cold, the lips had turned icy blue and the warm brown eyes were now permanently shut. It was the eternal sleep known as death.
"No," Kagome whispered as her body shook immensely. Kagome quickly made her way outside, looking for any sign of the mother that she had loved so dearly. There was no one, nothing. The image wouldn't disperse. It was actually becoming even clearer within her mind. It was haunting her thoughts and imagination.
Beads of sweat formed on her temples and fingertips as her mind was being taken over with the dark image. She attempted to wipe the sweat off of her face but her trembling hands weren't working right. They refused to move from her side as Kagome's fears were being realized. She shook her head as her vision began to become blurry and her breath was becoming short. She tried to convince herself that it was all in her mind, her imagination but the thoughts, the image refused to go away.
Pools of blue looked to the left and caught a sight that immediately stilled Kagome's fears. The teenager stood rooted to the ground her face showing the shock that she felt. It appeared that she had seen a ghost.
Mrs. Higurashi frowned as she made her way towards her daughter. Thin, ghost like hands lightly caressed Kagome's left cheek before moving up to touch Kagome's forehead.
Kagome looked shaken, terrified and in alarmed. It was amazing to see so many emotions on one's simultaneously. Mrs. Higurashi felt the sweat on Kagome's face and felt the tremors that Kagome's body was experiencing. It worried her to see her daughter in such a disturbing state. What had happened to cause this young girl to experience such anxiety? Her eyes moved down to examine her daughter's body. She looked fine except for a light scrape on her knee and the patches of dirt that clung to Kagome's feet.
Worried brown eyes met with Kagome's indecisive blue ones. Her frown deepened as she observed Kagome's face.
"Why are you outside… without even putting on shoes?" Mrs. Higurashi inquired and gripped on to her daughter's wrist, pulling the girl inside.
Kagome didn't say anything. She couldn't say anything. The relief that she had experienced by seeing her mother alive had paralyzed her. Mrs. Higurashi sat Kagome down on a chair in the kitchen before moving over to one of the draws. Kagome kept her eyes focused on her mother. She was scared that if she were to avert her attention away even for a moment, Mrs. Higurashi would disappear forever.
It took her sometime to form the words within her mind before Kagome could utter them.
"Where did you go, mama?"
Mrs. Higurashi didn't look back at Kagome. Instead she continued going through the drawers as if nothing had occurred previously.
"I took a trip to the doctor today," Mrs. Higruashi commented casually.
Kagome jumped to her feet immediately and looked at her mother's figure with surprised eyes. Her mind raced with possible reasons for the visit. Had something gone terribly wrong while she wasn't home? Mrs. Higurashi spoke before Kagome could. She knew that her daughter would go into worry as soon as she heard it.
"I am fine. I decided to have an early check up this week since I have been feeling well. I don't need anyone to go with me."
She turned and gave Kagome a warm smile before coming over with a cloth grasped between her fingers. Kagome was frowning once more. The worry still remained on Kagome's face. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her eyes were downcast. She was attempting to hide her emotions once more. It pained Mrs. Higurashi to see her daughter attempting to put a brave front when in fact she was a mere weak human being, riddled with fear and uncertainly. All she wanted was for Kagome to be happy, act like a normal teenage girl but Kagome instead took on Mrs. Higurashi's sickness upon herself. Mrs. Higurashi knew that she was burdening her daughter.
"Let me wipe your feet for you, Kagome," Mrs. Higurashi offered and plastered a smile on her face. She hoped that Kagome would not see through it.
Kagome's frown deepened but she seemed to be slightly relived as she gently took the damp cloth out of her mother's hand. A small smile formed on Kagome's face. Mrs. Higurashi couldn't even remember the last time that she had seen Kagome give a genuine smile. Like the others, this emotion was put on to please her mother. She held back her worry this time, knowing that it would cause Kagome concern
"I'm going to take a shower anyway. Thank you though mama," Kagome said and slowly stood to her feet.
Mrs. Higurashi looked as her daughter retreated upstairs. She waited a few moments before slumping down on a nearby chair.
The doctor's visit was like any other, except for when the doctor spoke in the end. The conversation with the doctor was continuously playing in her mind. His eyes were solemn, regretful. She knew what was coming next. She had received that same expression when she was first diagnosed. At first, Mrs. Higurashi had a desire to cover her ears and block out the words, to block out the reality of the situation. It then occurred to her that there was no way to block out this reality. It would eventually catch up with her, she knew it. This was something that she couldn't run away from and she wouldn't run away from it. She had listened without a word and left the doctor's office with his last words echoing within her mind.
She sighed and rubbed her eyes to prevent the tears from coming. If it was one thing, she could control was her emotions. She would never let her children see her cry for she knew that it would cause them pain, distress. She did not want them going through the same things that she did. There lives were only starting, hers was coming to an end.
She sighed and shut her eyes in an attempted to block the tears from flowing freely down her face. The conversation was once again echoing within her mind.
"You have stopped responding to treatments, Mrs. Higurashi. I would advise you to take care of your personal business as you don't seem to have much time left."
Mrs. Higurashi held back a sob as a tear trailed down her face. She constantly reminded herself no tears but when she thought about the grim future she could no longer hold it back. She foreshadowed darkness and misery.
She was dying and she knew it.
A/N: Ha that was fast wasn't it? Yeah I had this chapter written down a while now so that's why I did it so quickly. So tell me what you think about this chapter. Hopefully I will get into the mode of writing since I do have time now to write for as long as I want to. Expect the next chapter to be up next week or so… hopefully. Thank you to all who read and reviewed my last chapter, even though I was gone for so long.