Note: I do not own any of the characters within this story. They are the property of 07th Expansion.

So, er, I got this PM with someone realising I was a guy. Er, just as warning, I am in fact a male. I didn't think I'd ever have to explain this, but I guess it's better to be safe than sorry. Or something.

Also, BEHOLD THE GLORY OF SATOKO'S TRAPS: http://uk. NINE

Keiichi's loud snoring woke up Mion in the middle of the night. She put pillows over here ears to drown out the noise, but it was ultimately a futile effort.

Geez, Kei-chan, she thought angrily. I didn't know you were such a noisy sleeper. I'm never going to get any sleep at this rate!

Eventually, unable to take it anymore, she got up and fled her room. She dove into her grandmother's room, and took the futon out and spread it on the ground. Suddenly, she felt like taking revenge. Instead of heading back to sleep, she went out into another room, took a wooden chair, and carried it all the way back to her room. She put it over Keiichi's head, and left.

Sweet dreams, Kei-chan, she thought deviously.

She headed back to her grandmother's room, and fell asleep on the futon.

------------------------------

Keiichi woke up, and started to sit up, when he hit his head on something. He fell back down onto the futon, cursing.

"GODDAMNIT!" he shouted. "God, ow, what the hell!?"

He opened his eyes, and tried to focus. After a moment, he saw there was a chair there. He took a moment to consider this, before it became clear.

"MION!" he shouted out. "What the HELL is with this goddamned chair?"

He slid out from under the chair and got up. Pissed, he walked towards the bed and pulled back to covers - only to see she wasn't there. Her going into hiding only fuelled his rage, and he started to search the house for her. He left her room, and looked up and down the halls, only to see her walking towards him, rubbing her eyes, her hair let down, still wearing her pyjamas.

"Geez, Kei-chan," she muttered. "Are you always so noisy in the morning?"

"Only when I'm PISSED," he said, shaking. "Geez, you're as bad as Satoko."

She yawned and stretched herself out before answering him. "I have no idea what you're talking... about..."

"I'm talking about that goddamned chair!" he shouted, clenching his fist. "I hit my damn head when I woke up!"

"Oh... oh," she said, rubbing her eye again. "Sorry about that. You were snoring, you kept me up."

"I don't snore!" he said.

"Yeah you do," she said, as she leaned up against a wall. "Really loudly too."

She yawned again. "I'm too tired for this, Kei-chan," she said. "I'm going back to sleep for a bit... could you... make me some breakfast... for... when I wake up..."

As her speech started to slow down, she slid down the wall and closed her eyes. Keiichi watched her for a few moments. She started to snore lightly. Keiichi sighed, then headed into her kitchen to make some food. He was unsure of what to make, so he just decided to see if she had any eggs. He liked making eggs, they were easy. Looking through her cupboards, he eventually found a box full of them. He took four of them, and took out a pan, and started to fry them. He took out a couple of plates, and put them on the counter next to the pan. He finished frying them, and made sure to put two eggs on each plate. Next, he started to brew some green tea, and brought everything out to the table.

"Oi! Mion!" he shouted into the hall. "Breakfast's ready!"

After a moment, she stumbled into the room, still looking tired as hell. She pulled up a chair, and sat down.

"...Eggs and tea...?" she mumbled. "That's odd..."

Keiichi rubbed the back of his head. "It's uh, the only thing I know how to make, haha."

"You made those biscuits..." she mumbled.

"That's not breakfast," he replied.

She looked at the plate in front of her for a moment. "Nothing to eat with... ...or dip it in..."

Keiichi groaned, and started to look around for some chopsticks and sauce. She took a sip of her tea while he searched. Eventually, he came back, with some chopsticks.

"Couldn't find anything to dip it in," he said. "Er... I'm not sure the way I made the eggs is suitable for that anyway..."

She looked down at the eggs in front of her, with their runny yolks. With a shrug, she started to eat. Keiichi sat back down and joined her.

"Uh, Mion," he said, mouth full. "What're we, gulp what're we doing today? I forgot."

"We're going to Okinomiya," she said. "Sis said she needed some help at Angel Mort."

"Angel Mort?" he said, suddenly terrified. "I'm not... going to have to wear the uniform, am I?"

Mion let an evil smile slowly creep up her face. "Who knows?" she said. "I don't have any idea... eh heh heh..."

Keiichi shuddered. "Uh-uh-uh... are we... going anywhere else?" he asked.

"Well, we could see my uncle at the toy shop, see if he has anything new," she said. "Uhmmm... there's this movie I want to see. You'd love it."

Taking me out to see a movie, huh? he thought. Heh, this will be interesting. Although... I'm still scared of Angel Mort. Shion has absolutely no mercy, whatsoever.

Keiichi took another sip of his tea, and looked at Mion.

"You know..." he said. "You look nice with your hair down."

Mion blushed, and looked away. "R-really? You, uh, think so?"

"Yeah, I do," he said, looking at her some more. "But... you like better with your hair up. It's more Mion."

"A-ah... thanks," she said, nervously. "I guess right now... I look more, uh, Shion."

"I don't think so," he said. "You may be identical, but Shion gives off a completely different vibe. You don't seem like Shion to me, you seem like Mion with her hair down."

Mion didn't say anything, and took another sip of her tea.

------------------------------

Keiichi and Mion headed back to his house to get his bicycle. Along the way, they talked about various different things, including talk about her games, his dad's job, their friends. However, the most interesting topic was---

"Tomitake-san," said Keiichi. "Do you know if he's coming to Hinamizawa next year?"

"Well, he came here two or three times a year," she said. "But I think he's heading the investigation for Takano."

"Hmmm... that's right, she went missing," he said. "So, you don't think he'll come back?"

"They might send someone else in his place," she sighed. "It just wouldn't be the same. He promised he was going to publish my picture in a private gallery, you know."

"Uhhh..." he said. "What?"

"You heard," she said with a smirk. "The Beauties of Hinamizawa, ahh, I would've loved to see that. It was always fun, having him come every year, and take pictures. It's a shame he wasn't there for the festival. You know, I was going to invite him into the club. As an honorary member."

"Haha, that would've been interesting," he said. "Maybe he could've helped you take down that bear."

"Sh-shut up!" she said. "No one could take down that bear!"

"I did," he said. "With his help."

"Eh?" she said, confused.

"Anyway, what do you think happened to Takano-san?" he asked.

"I don't know," she said. "Maybe she's hiding in Shishibone or something. Maybe she became an underground doctor, ahahaha. Helping criminals get medical attention without drawing the attention of the authorities."

"That's an interesting theory," he said. "I doubt it's true."

"If it is," she said. "We'll be able to find her in no time at all. Maybe we should send Kasai out, he's good at this kind of thing."

"Er, that reminds me," said Keiichi. "Forgive me if this is a personal question, but uh, have you ever... fired a gun?"

Mion was silent for a moment. "Yeah, a nine millimetre handgun. Kasai taught me how to use it. I didn't really like it though. I mean, it was cool and all, but... well, especially with what happened at Watanagashi..."

"Yeah, I understand," said Keiichi. "Forgive me for asking. I'm sorry, it was stupid."

Mion was silent for a little while more. "Kei-chan... you don't think my family is... dangerous, do you?"

"Dangerous?" asked Keiichi. "I don't think so. I mean, I've only met you, your sister, your grandmother, and your uncles. Apart from maybe Shion, none of them strike me as dangerous."

"They're my father's brothers," she said. "They wouldn't be."

"You know," he said. "This is probably a personal question, so don't answer it if you don't have to, but why don't you live with your parents?"

"Mom pissed off grandma," she said. "She got disinherited. That's why I'm the next in line to be head of the Sonozaki family. Because I'm next in line, I have to live with grandma. I still see Mom and Dad a lot, though, so it's not bad or anything."

"Hmmmm... I wonder what they would think of me?" Keiichi wondered out loud.

"Mom would like you, I think," she replied. "Dad's a little gruff, but he'd warm up to you. It's grandma I worry about. She doesn't really like city folk, you see."

"I can imagine why," he said. "What, with the dam incident and everything."

"Yeah," she said. "There's your house now."

"Alright, be right back," he said, running towards his house. "See you in a sec."

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The bike ride to Okinomiya took them about an hour. When they got to town, they rode towards the toy shop, owned by Mion's uncle. She had at least three uncles that Keiichi knew about. One owned the toy shop. One owned Angel Mort. One owned this strange clothes shop, that sold school uniforms from many different schools in the country. Her father seemed to have a lot of brothers, but no sisters. Her mother on the other hand, was an only child, just like her mother, and all the previous Sonozaki heads before her. Mion was really the only exception, because she was a twin.

When they arrived at the shop, he saw her uncle standing out front.

"Hello there Mion!" he shouted, waving. "I see you're with your friend!"

"Heya uncle!" she shouted back, slowing to a stop in front of the store. "Got any cool new stuff?"

"Yeah, just got a lot of new stuff," he said. "Come inside, I'll show you. Also, Oishi-san stopped by. He wanted to invite you to another Mahjong round with his friends."

"Tell him I got a friend to send instead," she replied.

"H-hey Mion!" protested Keiichi. "I wanted to play with you."

"I thought you wanted to play with Oishi?" she said.

"I do, but uh, I wanted to play with you too," he replied.

"Hmmm, alright, tell Oishi I'm bringing a friend," she said.

"Will do," replied her uncle.

He opened the door to the shop, and let them in. Keiichi and Mion walked inside and headed to the pile of junk, with a sign above it that said 'new items'. He followed the two of them, and watched alongside Keiichi as Mion dug through the pile, looking for anything interesting. Eventually, she stopped, and held up a box.

"Hey hey! What's this?" she asked.

"It's this gambling game," he replied. "I can show you how to play."

"Mmmm, later," she said. "I've got a butt load of stuff to do today."

As she dug into the pile, her uncle leaned close to Keiichi.

"Hey," he whispered. "How's she treating that doll ya gave her?"

"Uh, fine," Keiichi replied. "She seems to like it a lot."

"Hehe, sorry about giving you such an unfitting gift," he said. "They weren't selling, so I had to lose them somehow."

"It's okay," replied Keiichi. "Though my masculinity was hurt, it turned out for the best in the end. She was really glad about it."

"That's good," he said. "You treat my niece good now, you hear?"

"Yeah yeah, I hear ya," replied Keiichi.

Mion held up another box, face alight with excitement.

------------------------------

Mion had a bag full of new stuff, which she was quite glad about. Another thing she was glad about was that she was going to make Keiichi wear an Angel Mort uniform for all to behold. They were stood inside the restaurant, waiting to be seated. Keiichi stood relaxed, while Mion was leaning up against the wall with her arms crossed.

"Sonozaki-san?" said the waitress. "Your table is ready, follow me please."

Mion uncrossed her arms and followed the waitress to a free table, Keiichi tagging along close behind. They sat down, and the waitress gave them a pair of menus before walking off.

"Man, all these cakes and stuff," muttered Keiichi. "There is no way eating here is good for you."

"Nope," said Mion, with a huge grin. "I'll be right back, gonna talk to Shion."

Mion got out of her seat and wandered off. Keiichi just sat there, looking at the menu, when he heard a familiar voice behind him.

"Wh-what? No, I have NOT had enough to eat!! I am not leaving!! I still need to have more sweet, beautiful desserts... oh... I HAVE NOT YET HAD MY FILL!! NOW BRING ME THAT CHEESE CAKE!!" shouted a young man behind him.

Kameda, thought Keiichi. That guy... hahaha.

He turned round and tapped Kameda on the shoulder. Surprised, he turned round.

"K---!!!" he shouted in excitement. "Fancy seeing you here!"

"Yep, I know," replied Keiichi. "How have you been? Haven't seen you in a while."

Keiichi mentally noted the guy seemed to be a bit chubbier than the last time he saw him.

"I've been gorging myself," he admitted. "What about you, K?"

"I've... uh," said Keiichi. "I'm on a date... I guess?"

"Ah, you lucky guy," said Kameda, with a huge smile on his face. "Dating one of the employees here? Which one is it? Otobe-san? Sonozaki-san? Tenma-san?"

Keiichi shook his head. "I'm not dating one of the employees. I don't know if you can even call this a date?" he said.

"Er, why did you drag her here?" asked Kameda. "Wouldn't she get jealous?"

"She dragged me here," replied Keiichi.

Beat.

"Sonozaki-san? You mean Shion?" he asked.

"Yeah," replied Kameda. "You know her?"

"She's uh, the sister of the person I'm here with," replied Keiichi. "I hope you haven't done anything bad to her."

"Sisters? Oh my, you really are lucky, K," said Kameda. "No, I'm not like that. Some of the other people that regular here however..."

As he trailed off, he looked towards the smoking seats. Over there he could see Shion, bringing out some cake, when one of the men tripped her up. The cake she was carrying out landed on the man's crotch. Something clicked in his mind. He had seen this before. Now he was going to make her wipe the mess off of him... unless he did something.

"YOU THERE!!" shouted Keiichi, as he stood up. "What the HELL do you think you're doing!?"

The greasy young man looked up at him. "C-c-comrade K!" he said. "I was just getting this awful waitress to clean this mess she made."

Keiichi stormed over to him.

"Don't give me that crap!" he shouted. "You tripped her up on purpose!!"

"She ruined my best jeans!" the man protested.

Keiichi looked at his jeans. He could see all kinds of stains in them, and they were riddled in holes.

"You ruined your own damn jeans, pal," he replied. "Now, apologise to Shion!"

"Hehehehehe... if she didn't want this, then why work here?" said the man. "She knows what kind of place this is."

"She shouldn't have to worry about crap like this!! Don't you know, BEAUTIFUL GIRLS ARE TO BE TREASURED!! This is not treasuring her. This is degrading, and humiliating her! You, you are the scum of this earth. Don't you know you're suppose to look after, and admire your treasures!? A GIRL IS JUST LIKE THE CHEST OF GOLD A PIRATE SHIP HAS!! The pirate captain keeps all of his loot in a box!! PIRATE TREASURE IS A GIFT HE LOOKS AT, BUT NEVER TOUCHES!! THESE GIRLS ARE PRECIOUS TREASURES, YOU ARE SCRATCHING THEM, RUINING THEIR QUALITY!!! What you have done is unforgivable. You don't deserve these treasures. GET OUT OF HERE NOW BEFORE I KICK YOUR ASS!!!" ranted Keiichi.

"I-I-I-I-I'm so sorry, K-sama!" said the man, as he bowed before him. "I didn't know! I'm leaving I'm leaving!"

As the man left, Keiichi knelt down to help Shion.

"Consider this thanks for helping me figure out the truth about Mion," he said.

Shion smiled. "You know, I'm used to this sort of thing," she said.

"Er, I'm here with Mion now," he said. "I don't know where she got off to, but uh, I'm supposed to lend a helping hand around here."

Shion considered this for a moment, with a finger on her chin. "I think you've already helped," she said.

"That's a relief," he said. "I wonder where Mion went off to?"

------------------------------

Mion sighed as she waited outside for Angel Mort. She had ticked off a waitress who wouldn't let her go into the staff only area to see Shion. She assumed the girl was new and didn't know who she was, as usually, they never cared about stuff like this in the past. The waitress had gotten so angry she forced Mion to leave, and kept eyeing her to see if she was going to try to get back inside. Her only hope would be that Keiichi would notice she was outside, but she didn't know how likely that was.

She looked in the window, and saw Keiichi had ordered two drinks. He was sipping him all by himself, while the other sat by itself. She groaned and starting pacing back and forth.

"Sis!" came a voice.

Mion turned round and saw Shion coming outside the door.

"Sis, Kei-chan's waiting for you," said Shion. "What're you doing out here?"

"One of the damn girls in there kicked me out," she said. "Tch. Cause I was trying to find you."

"Well, I'm here now, come inside," replied Shion.

"Alright," said Mion, as she walked to the door. "Tell that damn girl to leave me alone."

------------------------------

"Oi! Mion! Where were you!?" asked Keiichi angrily. "I ordered you a strawberry milkshake. Tch."

"Oh, uh, thanks," said Mion, as she sat down. "It's a long story. Short version - Angel Mort needs to raise it's hiring standards."

"Now that's unfair," protested Shion. "Kuranari-san was only doing what she thought was her job."

"Yeah, whatever," said Mion. "Anyway, get us an ultra rare cheesecake."

"I'm uh, not the one serving you," said Shion.

"Oh yeah, that reminds me," said Mion. "I brought Kei-chan here to give a helping hand around here."

"And a splendid job he did," said Shion. "I appreciate the help. But his job is done."

"Eh? What did he do?" asked Mion.

"Well, he instilled some manners in one of the regulars here," said Shion. "And it was certainly something to see."

"Yeah, well, you know," said Keiichi, as he picked his ear. "Just doing what's right. No biggie."

"Alright, have fun you two," said Shion, as she left to serve another table.

Mion shrugged, and sipped some of her milkshake.

"Mion," said Keiichi. "You know how I said everything was going to change today?"

"Ah, er yeah," she replied. "What did you mean by that?"

"You'll see later today," he said.

"Tch. This better not be something stupid, Kei-chan," she replied.

------------------------------

The two of them were sharing the cheesecake. They had already eaten most of it, there was just a little left, and the strawberry that came with it. Keiichi took his fork, turned it sideways, and pressed down on the strawberry, cutting it in half. He then picked it up with his fork, and ate it. Mion ate the other half, and then finished off her milkshake.

"Mion," he said, folding his arms on the table.

"Yeah?" she replied.

"When is that move?" he asked.

"Probably a few hours, we have some time to kill," she said.

"What movie is it?" he asked.

"Ah, I'm glad you asked," she said, clearing her throat. "It's a science fiction epic, about these people who are enslaved by this alien race, and they have to fight back using the power of humanity!!"

"Sounds cheesy," said Keiichi.

"It probably is," she said. "I still want to see it."

Keiichi took another sip of his milkshake. "Say, Mion," he said. "Why don't we invite Shion to come play Mahjong with your uncle?"

"Hmmmm... I'm not sure if she'd like it," she replied.

"You never know," said Keiichi. "Heh, I just want to make sure I'm not going to get my ass handed to me when we play Oishi-san later."

"Alright," said Mion. "Shion's shift should end in about half an hour. We can play until it's time for the movie."

"Heheh, this should be good," said Keiichi. "It'll be good to have someone else new playing with me too."

Mion finished off the cheesecake, and Keiichi finished his milkshake. They both got up, and walked over to where Shion was serving some customers.