Okay, well here I am in this particular universe. I do not own Mai HiME, and if I did, well Kiyohime would have...ah, nevermind. Yurianimeotaku said something to me not too long ago, and this popped into my head, and needed to be done. I chose 05 because that's when the series came out. And I know nothing about motorcycles, that should be painfully obvious.


Posted: 1/16/05

FOR SALE!!!!!!

BRAND NEW 05'

TOP OF THE LINE

MIDNIGHT BLUE

FULLY EQUIPPED

DUCATI MOTORBIKE

Very generous and forgiving lover is putting up her stubborn girlfriend's newly purchased Ducati (nicknamed "Duran") motorcycle. Said lover feels that girlfriend is spending too much time caring and riding the motorbike instead of her. Said lover also feels that when being intimate, "vroom-vroom" and, "get the hell off the road, asshole!" are not choice romantic words. Also during love-making, lover does not appreciate girlfriend mistaking her face as a kickstand.

Lover does not appreciate girlfriend waking up and leaving their nice warm bed in the middle of the night because girlfriend insists, "it's mayo-time!" Lover argues that this would not be a big deal if girlfriend just walked downstairs to the kitchen instead of fully suiting up, jumping out the window, landing in the bushes, loudly starting the machine and noisily driving 30 feet to the other side of the house.

Please understand lover's position. Here is another example. On weekends when girlfriend and lover want to go out, girlfriend always insists that "Duran" come along. Lover must gently, yet sternly point out that "Duran" is not a person, and that it won't fit onto the picnic blanket or into the row boat on the lake. Lover must then also remind girlfriend that "Duran" does not count as a pet, and cannot sleep in, on, or anywhere near the bed. It must stay outside.

Lover does not see this advertisement as malicious, but a wonderful opportunity for both buyer and seller. Buyer will get a very nice 1st class motorcycle. And lover and girlfriend can spend more quality time together sipping tea while watching snakes and puppies play together on sunny afternoons. Also, that filthy little red fox won't come around anymore and ask to see girlfriend's "crotch-rocket".

The fact that girlfriend comes home from school and the first thing she does is clean, wash, polish and wax until, "Duran purs" every day, does not play into this. Furthermore, the fact that girlfriend refers to "Duran" as her "baby" and talks to it in a very…provocative manner, does not play into it as well.

Do not miss out on this opportunity. Girlfriend says that nothing compares to true love, and I cannot agree more. For more detailed information, please contact seller.

Added To Post On: 1/17/05

Girlfriend does not have any qualms with putting the Ducati up for sale, even though she found the original document strategically hidden under lover's very large, very sharp naginata. Girlfriend is very happy that she and her understanding, not to mention sexy lover will have no more distractions from their love from now on.