A/N: I lost it on this one, I really did.
Matt and Jeff stood in the middle of the ring. Matt had his arm around Lita who was clinging onto him for dear life. "What the Dudleys did to us last week is in the past. It's over and done with. If they come out here and attack us because they aren't the new number one contenders for the World Tag Team Championship…well, that's their own damn fault, now isn't it? Now, the only things that we have standing in between us and holding the World Tag Team Championship are Edge and Christian."
Almost as if on cue, Edge and Christian waltzed down to the ring with their tag team belts and kazoos in hand, Trish Stratus not too far behind. Then again, they were just waiting for the right opportunity to crash the party.
"Is this your sad attempt at a celebration?" Edge asked, tooting on the kazoo a bit.
"We're not celebrating anything," Lita answered.
"Yeah, it's just as I thought. They don't know how to party," Edge said, rolling his eyes and placing the kazoo securely in his pocket.
"That's because they're a bunch of gearboxes, Edge. How many times to I have to tell you?" Christian sighed.
"Shut up, little brother. I'll have mom bend you over her knee and spank you for talking to me like that."
"Whoa! Quit your little family argument. I don't want to hear about your mom spanking you," Jeff interrupted, rubbing the back of his head.
"Hardy, why don't you just go away and buy more makeup," Trish jeered at the younger Hardy.
"You should follow your own advice, Trish. You're the one coming out here looking like a hag," Jeff retorted.
"Whoa, don't talk to my lady like that!" Christian said, stepping in between Jeff and Trish while she ran her hand down his back.
"She doesn't need you to defend her, Christian. Trish can handle her own problems," Lita interjected.
"Stay out my business, bitch," Trish rattled.
"Everybody settle down!" Edge yelled, trying to be the voice of reason, which was funny since he never really made any sense…ever. "Look, how about we have a little inter-gender tag team match tonight. It's 2000, for crying out loud. It's the new millennium. The women can handle themselves, but that doesn't mean that we can't intervene. How about…Jeff and Lita against Trish and Christian. Matthew and I can sit ringside with the lovely JR and King to make sure that things don't go awry. Does that sound okay?"
The group of six all looked around at each other and nodded in their agreement.
"Good," Edge said, and then turned to Christian. "Little brother, make sure to keep Lita away from your private area. It's no big secret that she is very well skilled in the art of suckitude."
"Dude!" Christian replied and high-fived his older brother as Trish giggled along. Lita stormed up the ramp ahead of Matt and Jeff, clearly embarrassed from the outburst.
The cameras didn't want to miss a thing, so they followed the six backstage as they were sure that the chaos would ensue.
One set of cameras followed Team Xtreme, and another set followed Edge, Christian, and Trish.
"I don't want to fight Trish," Jeff whined, slinking up against the wall.
"Well, you were really mean to her out there," Lita consoled, patting his back.
"It's not my fault that I like her. I liked her way before that Christian jerk got to her."
"She's not worth it, dude," Matt sighed.
"When are you going to bang Lita?" Christian asked.
"Christian! That is no way to talk to the ladies! I can't believe Trish puts up with you."
"Are you turning into a reekazoid on me?" Christian asked, worried about his brother's sanity.
"If I gave you some soda, would you shut up?"
Matt sat next to King whilst Edge sat next to JR. The two ladies started off the match. Trish led the fight with a vicious slap across Lita's face, who then tackled the blonde bitch.
"Go get her, honey!" Christian cheered from the corner.
Lita ended up getting to Jeff before Trish could get to Christian. Jeff reluctantly stepped in between the top two ropes and stood face to face with Trish Stratus.
If it was a mixed tag match, Christian would have to step in for Trish and try to beat the hell out of Jeff Hardy. Since it was an inter-gender match, Jeff could do what he pleased to Trish without fear of disqualification.
It was just too damn bad that taking her out on a date wouldn't entertain the fans any.
Christian jumped in the ring right when Jeff did. He picked up Trish and carried her away. "No! What do you think you're doing, you reekazoidical gearbox? Don't you dare touch my girlfriend! I can't believe I agreed to this!"
By the time Edge got up from his seat, Christian and Trish were already backstage and counted out for the loss.
Matt joined the other two thirds of Team Xtreme in the ring and could only look at each other in confusion.
A/N: Yep, finally updated.