Author's Note: This idea came to me out of nowhere in the middle of the night as I tried to get to sleep. I'd always wondered how one of the GGG mecha would react to a car wash, and that kinda fused with the idea of a hands-on car wash (not the automated type you find at gas stations and garages, but an actual human with a hose) with Volfogg and Mamoru and the GunMachines. And that was when the plot bunny bit me. This is the result.

This takes place a couple years before "Change of Perspective", when Mamoru is 15 or so.

Disclaimer: GaoGaiGar belongs to people with lawyers I don't want to mess with, not to me.

Car Wash

"For crying out loud, Volfogg, I'm not going to bite you! Come over here!"

The slightly irritated words were being directed at the police car sitting at the end of the driveway, as far in as required to get its aft end out of the way of traffic. All four tires were braced in a way that clearly said "not moving". The vehicle stubbornly refused to budge even an inch.

Mamoru sighed, waving the hose. "You know as well as I do that the others aren't going to let you on board the ship in that condition because of the mess. Just come over here and let me clean it off!"

Volfogg shifted on his suspension. The last fight had left him covered in mud from the tires up; only his roof still showed white through all the brown. Mud dripped from his sides and left brown trails behind him. But he'd only ever gotten a wash from the cleaning stations on board the ships and the Orbit Base; he'd never been washed by hand before, and he was more than a little edgy about it.

Both HyoRyu and EnRyu had gone through being washed by the human GGG members before, and both swore that nothing else felt as good. During the last conversation with FuuRyu and RaiRyu, who were back in China, RaiRyu had explained that he and his twin had won a bet against their creator, the scientist Yan Long-Li, and the result had been the scientist peeling off his uniform and donning swimming trunks to help his crew wash the two mechs. The pair had been very smug about finally winning a bet, and the wash had left them in a very good mood.

An engine revved behind Volfogg, and a motorcycle, muddy brown from tires to handlebars, poked its front end around the police car. GunDober had gotten so thoroughly stuck in the mud that the Ryu twins had had to dig him out; he was so completely covered that none of his paint showed through. GunGlue, circling overhead, wasn't much better off, though one of the twins has hosed off his rotor blades so he wouldn't be flinging mud all over everything while he flew. Both were itching to be cleaned off, and that hose, plus the bucket of warm soapy water, the brushes, the wax, and the polishing cloths were exerting an irresistable attraction for the pair. Neither quite got why their team leader was so reluctant to approach Mamoru when the brunette was clearly offering relief from the clinging mud.

Bursts of communication flashed between them. Then GunDober nosed past Volfogg and headed toward Mamoru, parking in front of him and lowering the kickstand. Volfogg shifted slightly, watching intently as Mamoru turned the hose on the bike, washing away the mud. Once the worst of it was gone, the brunette dropped the hose and picked up a washcloth, applying it to GunDober's side and getting the mud out of every crevice it had managed to work its way into. He even evicted the buildup in GunDober's wheel wells, being careful around the handlebars and the control panels. GunDober leaned into the touch, opening a commline to Volfogg and letting the police car mech hear his hum of sheer relief as warm water and soap suds washed away the itching brown mess from his frame.

Privately, the ninja mech had to admit that it looked very good. Mamoru clearly knew what he was doing.

Once every bit of mud was gone and GunDober's frame gleamed in the early afternoon sun, Mamoru dried him off, then opened a container of wax and got to work with it. GunDober's engine purred audibly at the attention, vibrating under Mamoru's hands. By the time the young brunette was finished, the Gun Robot's armor almost glowed white and black and purple, and he was purring loudly.

"There." Mamoru patted GunDober's rear fender, and the motorcycle revved slightly in thanks before rolling over to a sunny corner of the yard and parking. The brunette watched with a smile, then looked back at Volfogg. "Well?"

Volfogg sighed. "All right, I concede defeat." He rolled slowly down the driveway and into the yard, parking in the middle of the wet spot where GunDober had been. GunGlue landed in the driveway, rotors whirring to a stop, awaiting his turn.

Mamoru patted Volfogg's side, then began to spray the mud off. Volfogg shivered slightly as the worst of the brown goop ran down his sides to cover the grass, though the cool water did relieve the itching. The 15-year-old sprayed across the roof to get the mud off, and even knelt down to spray across Volfogg's underside, getting the accumulated mud off his undercarriage, the front of his body in his bipedal form. He paid attention to every crevice where mud could get into, using the hose to get them as clean as possible, then picking up the cleaning cloth from the bucket of suds and warm water and began running it over the ninja mech's frame.

What really won the aloof ninja over was when Mamoru crouched down and used the hose to clean out Volfogg's wheel wells. Most of the time those areas were neglected, and it itched like crazy when mud was left to accumulate there for a while. He shifted his tires to give the brunette more room to work as Mamoru picked up a brush and began getting rid of the mud the hose had missed. It felt good, and the ninja mech let out a relieved sigh while fighting not to sink lower on his suspension.

"Told you I wouldn't bite." Mamoru patted the nearest fender while working the brush around the wheel well. From Volfogg's reaction, having mud in there itched badly. He maneuvered around the tire to get all of the mud, then moved to the next wheel well.

"Hmm," was the absent response as Volfogg shifted to the side, giving him more access to the wheel well. Mamoru laughed to himself, leaning his shoulder against a warm metal side while he worked on the wheel well.

Once all of the mud was gone, Volfogg allowed himself to sink lower on his suspension, his engine rumbling softly in a contented purr. Mamoru smiled at him, then picked up the drying cloth and worked his way over every inch of white metal. The police car actually leaned into his hands as he worked, the barely-audible hum becoming a more audible croon.

Then came the waxing and buffing. By the time Mamoru was finished, Volfogg had practically melted into a puddle of police car. His frame gleamed pure white instead of the greyish color he'd developed lately. His engine was purring so intensely that the entire vehicle vibrated.

"There." Mamoru rubbed the cloth along Volfogg's spoiler one more time, then stepped back to survey his handiwork. The ninja police car almost glowed in the sun, every inch of metal polished and shining. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"

"That was much better than I thought it would be," was the response, and Volfogg edged away to join GunDober. He settled as low on his suspension as he could, heaving a huge sigh of contentment.

The green-eyed teenager smiled as he watched his guardian settle down, then turned to face GunGlue. "Your turn!"

The eager copter-mech almost hopped over, his rotors lifting him in a series of bounces until he settled into position, and then they whirred to a stop. Mamoru waited until the blades stopped moving, then began washing the helicopter. Mud sheeted down GunGlue's sides, and the Gun Robot chirped in utter relief. Humming to himself, Mamoru applied the cleaning cloth to white and purple and black metal, listening to a chirping purr rising from the mech. Finding a ladder, he climbed up to clean GunGlue's rotor blades, paying attention to every inch. When he reached the rotor assembly, where the four blades joined, he pulled out a special brush and began working it into the assembly, digging out all of the mud.

The sun was heading for the western horizon when Mamoru finished waxing and polishing GunGlue, and the heli-mech was a purring puddle of helicopter, so relaxed the tips of his rotor blades pointed toward the ground instead of being out sideways. The brunette watched him with a smile, then put away the cleaning supplies and walked over to sit beside Volfogg, leaning against a warm metal side. Closing his eyes, he leaned back against the warm metal, closing his eyes and drowsing in the late afternoon sun.

Roughly an hour later Guy showed up with HyoRyu, looking for Volfogg and the GunMachines. As expected, where Mamoru was, they were. Part of the yard was wet, and there was mud on the grass. A hose lay next to the house. Off to one side were Volfogg and GunDober, side-by-side, so clean their paint almost glowed white. Not far away was GunGlue, in the same condition, armor polished to a shine. Light rippled across his frame. And Mamoru was leaning against Volfogg's side, dozing, wearing only a pair of swimming trunks.

Volfogg shifted slightly on his suspension, and Mamoru opened his eyes blinking. Noting Guy, he waved. "Guy!"

"Hello, Mamoru." The older man walked into the yard while HyoRyu, in the driveway, watched with amusement. "Water, mud, and clean mechs... what happened here?"

"Car wash." Mamoru grinned. "Took a bit of convincing to get Volfogg to go through with it, though."

Volfogg snorted at that. Mamoru patted his fender.

"They looka lot better now that they aren't completely brown from the tires up," Guy observed. He looked close at GunGlue. "Waxed and polished, too?"

"They got the deluxe treatment." Mamoru nodded.

"En will be jealous," HyoRyu observed with a chuckle. "We just got sprayed off and hand-washed; no waxing for us."

Mamoru chuckled. "Don't look at me, big guy; both of you are too big for me to handle. My services are reserved for police cars, bikes, and copters."

Volfogg's engine purred, echoed by GunDober and a pleased whir of GunGlue's rotors. Guy chuckled at them, then walked over to pat Volfogg's hood. "Looks like you three have your own private car wash."

"And we'd like to keep it that way," Volfogg agreed. Mamoru grinned brightly, running a hand along a gleaming fender.

Guy laughed. "Well, you three, now you're clean enough to get on the ship and come back to the Orbit Base. It's getting late, and you three haven't gotten your refueling yet."

The two Gun Robots grumbled softly as they roused from the light doze they'd been in, heading for the ship. Mamoru pushed himself up, hugging Volfogg's hood and murmuring something only the ninja police car could hear. Then he stepped back, and Volfogg eased past, heading for the road. Guy climbed back into HyoRyu's cab, waving to Mamoru as they followed Volfogg and his team.

Standing on the porch, Mamoru watched them go. He was smiling, having enjoyed the day. Washing the GunMachines and Volfogg had been oddly relaxing, and he looked forward to the next time.

Turning, he went back into the house.


As I said, this one came to me in the middle of the night. Sorry if the ending is weird. My plot bunnies seem to love doing that to me ;