'Cynthia um' Tim stood at the door and realised he had no idea how to start this conversation.
'Would you like to see the Director?'
' Um no, I actually came up to see you '
'Oh really? Well that's nice, no one really seems to come up her to see me'. Tim shuffled his feet nervously as the words he needed to say ran through his head, out the door and into the car park giggling and pushing each other in their excitement to be free. Cynthia smiled reassuringly at Tim, who she gathered from his response was rather nervous about whatever it is he was going ask.
'Its all right, I can keep a secret if it is confidential'. Tim smiled at her a bit relieved none the less and started 'Well you see I have this underwear…'
'I mean it's woman's underwear…'.
'Oh no no it's not like that! I found some underwear in the autopsy corridor. I didn't realise what it was at first,' his words tumbled out in a rush as he tried to make himself understood 'and now I have this pair of underwear, well now two actually and I don't know what to do with them. I was hoping you would maybe ask around to see if some of the ladies had dropped or were missing a pair of underwear?'
Cynthia smiled at the nervous agent. 'I would love to help but there is a big operation on at the moment and the Director has asked that I stay here and screen calls while she is on the phone to Sec Nav. I could be here all day, I just don't know. Sorry McGee. I do know that there is a lost and found section over in the Accounts department on the other side of the building.' She smiled up at him as she watched his face fall. 'Actually if you are going over there you could do me a favour?' She asked hopefully 'I was tidying up in the boardroom yesterday, putting out some files in preparation for a meeting and I found this.' She pulled a black lace suspender belt out of her filing cabinet. Tim just starred at it and then they both began to laugh.
'Well someone is definitely having much more of an exciting life than I am'.
'And me!' Cynthia agreed 'I am kind of in the same situation. I just have not had the chance to go over there and drop it off. Could you if you're already going over there?' Again that hopeful smile.
Tim sighed 'Well I suppose it's a two panties to one suspender belt vote and I loose. Don't worry I will try and do it as soon as I'm able.'
'Thanks McGee. If I do get the chance to get out of here earlier than I thought and it looks like you have been tied up with work, I will take them over.' Tim nodded and now with a suspender belt wadded up in his pocket headed back to his desk.
Jimmy waited until Tony and Ziva had left the squad room and headed down to see Abby about the ballistics report before slipping the bright blue thong back into the draw. After a double take he realised that there was yet another pair of underwear in the draw. How had he missed them the first time? He realised he didn't know what colour the underwear Michelle was missing this time was. He really should pay more attention to them before whipping them off. Thinking McGee was still out with Gibbs and the other two could be a while he slipped the red pair into his pocket and trotted off to see Michelle hoping that his time for sure he must be right. How many pairs of woman's underwear could be lying around NCIS or well in fact in Timothy McGee's drawer in one day?
Tony and Ziva came back up to the squad room. Tony unable to help himself, and with McGee still having that paperwork signed off by the Director, snuck a quick peak into the draw. He took a deep breath 'I don't believe it!'
'What? Ziva looked across at him, her curiosity getting the better of her after hearing the surprised breath. Tony without saying a word lifted with one finger the original bright blue thong up.
'Its back?' Ziva responded surprised 'and what about the red pair?' Tony shook his head and then thoroughly searched the draw before turning and running through McGee's filing cabinet and everything surrounding his desk.
'Nope not a sign, it's like the underwear is changing its colour and shape somehow?' 'Don't forget disappearing completely' Ziva replied helpfully.
'Yes yes that too!' Tony placed the underwear cautiously back into the drawer almost as if it might explode at any moment and went to sit down at his desk.
'My head hurts' he started rubbing his temple. 'I'm glad you were here to witness this Ziva or I might think I was going mad. Ok ok I think I need a timeline or a chart or something will help explain the mystery.'
'Of the case?'
'No Ziva, the Preposterous Panties '.
'Gibbs will kill you if he finds out' Ziva taunted
'I am a highly trained investigator. I will not allow McGee's silky underthings to beat me at my own game.'
Some minutes later…..
Tony peered down at the scribbled drawings of arrows, times and people in attendance he had made, complete with both blue and pink highlighters to indicate the underwear. 'Ok if we leave the room in theory the underwear, going on current trend will either change colour and the red ones will be back or they will disappear completely. Come on Ziva we have to go just for a minute'.
'Why nothing will happen except Gibbs will chew us out of not working on the case.'
'Come on Ziva' Tony tugged at her arm until she relented.
'Ok just for a minute and we will go see Ducky as he might have some more information for us if he has finished his autopsy.'
Jimmy waited again and once the pair had argued their way to the elevator he stuffed the red briefs into the draw along with its bright blue companion.
Tim walked down the stairs somewhat despondent. Instead of getting rid of the underwear he appeared to have inherited a pair of black lace suspenders. Still at least he knew where lost and found was now and as soon as he got the chance he would stuff his pockets and head across to the other side of the building and be free of his growing taunting burden. It was as he went to sit at his desk that his phone rang with Abby calling with an excited urgent request for him to come straight down and help her collate the blood splatter analysis. Sighing he placed the suspender belt into his draw and glancing to see if DiNozzo was around, hurried across to the lift. He really needed to get rid of this……. This…… this collection before Tony caught on as otherwise he was a dead man.
'Ok Ziva, this should be long enough for the underwear to work its magic.'
'It's magic?' Ziva turned to assess her team mate. 'Yes well, until I can figure out what is going on'. Tony almost bolted out of the lift and with a quick look to assure him that neither McGee nor Gibbs was around stood at McGee's desk. With a deep breath he closed his eyes and began to pull the draw open. Opening one eye he peeped down into the open draw. 'I don't believe it! They're multiplying!' 'What?' Ziva came over and also peered into the draw. She picked up the black lace suspender belt while Tony picked up the original blue thong in one hand and the red briefs in the other. Tony and Ziva starred at each other. 'Well even I have to say this is strange'.
'Ok now its confrontation time. This is just getting ridiculous. At the current rate of expansion it would appear there won't be a woman left in the building with underwear on by the end of the week! They will all be busting out of Timmy McGee draws!' Tony stuffed the underwear back into the drawer and dragging Ziva went off in search of Gibbs or McGee. It didn't really matter which one he collared first as it would all end up with the angelic Timothy McGee, his Probie having to come down off his high horse, throw his halo in the bin and admit to doing naughty things…. At work….. with different woman…in one day! Ha he would never be able to raise an eyebrow in Tony's direction again.
Tony saw Gibbs stepping out of the elevator and rushed through the squad room towards him, Ziva hot on his tail to witness the confrontation. 'Boss!!! Boss! McGee has a collection of women's underwear in his draw and it is affecting his work! He was almost rubbing his hands with glee.
'What are you talking about, DiNozzo?' Gibbs stared at Tony
' He has magic underwear in his draw and it keeps disappearing and reappearing and…. and just look in his draw!'
Gibbs starred at his Senior Agent who was currently babbling about magic underwear and wondered if Tony had been hit in the head – again.
'Tony if McGee wants to wear woman's underwear that is his prerogative. I just don't want to know about it!'
'Hey I do not wear woman's underwear! McGee, his worst nightmare confirmed rushed out of the lift across the room in a flash and grabbed Tony's arm. Tony wrestled with McGee for the right to open the draw and as they both struggled, tipping McGee chair over in the process the draw flew open to reveal………. Neat piles of staples, pens and paper clips. Gibbs peered over Tony shoulder and grinned. 'Yes I can see how the neatness of McGee's draw has caused you such alarm, DiNozzo.' He head slapped him. 'Now that's for spreading false rumours about your team mates' and then he head slapped him again 'that one is for not concentration on the case!'
McGee looked up amazed at his clean underwearless draw. At that instant he looked up to see Cynthia waiving at him, catching his attention and pointing to the little boutique style paper bag she was carrying before heading towards the lift. Tim sighed and then smiled. She had obviously felt sorry for his predicament and briefly freed of her duties headed to the Lost and Found. And just in the nick of time. Tim breathed a sigh of relief. Finally. Well on with the day and solving this case.
Tony was silent at his desk for a moment before beginning a slow rock back and forth. 'There was underwear and it changed colour! Boss you see and it was magic and maybe it flew away and then just came back but it waited for us to see it? No maybe it was Magic Vegas underwear like what those hot magician assistants wear …….. '
Ducky stuck his head outside the autopsy doors and looked up and down the corridor. Where on earth could they be? Underwear didn't simply get up and walk away? Such a nice shade of blue they were too. Reminded him of the sky when he was a child after the war…….
Director Sheppard waited until Cynthia had headed out on some errand before she had walked across to the boardroom. She had moved every chair, looked under the table and opened every cupboard and she still couldn't find it. Maybe her car????
Michelle sighed. Really the cost of her lost underwear was starting to spiral. She liked to have nice pretty underwear but at this rate she just wasn't going to wear bottoms. It was proving too risky and too expensive.
Ziva mused quietly to herself. Perhaps McGee's skills were better than he was letting on, if he had be able to acquire her underwear without her noticing. Tony had teased her that he had a crush on her but she hadn't believed him. Now she decided he certainly deserved closer watching. She smiled across at him as he worked.
Tim looked up to see Ziva smiling at him. He felt a bit creeped out. Did she know that he really did have underwear in his draw? He turned around to see if she was really looking at someone behind him. Nope. She was still smiling when he turned around so he smiled back. She really was beautiful when she smiled.