My whole life through, I promised myself
I would follow her steps and light her way
I would see inside her heart, whatever she feels
I would guide her not to go astray
It was a perfect scene, two people looking outside the glass pane of the 14th floor of the exquisite hotel into the shimmer of the beautiful moonlight illuminating the blue velvet that covered the starlit nightsky. His eyes were shining while chatting busily and the girl with short, mauve mane, there beside him, just plain listening.
Just one thing was wrong.
Oh so wrong.
The different hues of blue filled his delighted orbs. Cerulean for lightheartedness, indigo for genuineness, sapphire for happiness…
She was pretending.
That nothing happened.
I'd do everything, yes everything
If it meant the euphoria I am to give
Certainly, I would refuse to offer nothing
If it is my life, I'm willing to sacrifice
How could they do this to her?
How could they make her look like a stupid fool?
How could they break the trust she had given them?
But no, she knew why. She knew the fucking reason why.
They have been doing this to protect her. To keep her from hurting. Because they believed she had gotten too much, too darn much, to take the things anymore.
Don't they know they're hurting her all the more?
Demo…she won't spoil them. It pains her too much, it does, when she tries to hide what she knows and cruises with their harbor of deceit.
They had made too much effort. They too, have suffered too much.
And she, being the masochist she is, would ignore and play blind and deaf to all the misery she has been going through.
I swore, no one could destroy our blissful flair
Not destiny, time nor God himself
I have been a victim, drowning into her lair
Sorry, Kami-sama, how mighty I've fallen
She was selfish, clinging desperately to her family in agony because she won't let them go.
And her comrades knew it. After the car accident, they had kept it and told her that her parents are just in America for medications.
And now they are here, another maze of spun deception, she living the role of a soulless doll, Kirisawa Fuuko.
No, it wasn't the loss. It wasn't the loss that freaks her most.
It was her life. Her newfound life. It freaks her that her whole life is a set up, a lie, all was fake. Nothing she touched nor felt was ever true.
Yet she can't leave. Not when they knew nothing of her current situation.
She had tried so hard, she swore she would tell them sooner or later, but whenever she would see the trust and faith in the unknowing eyes, she keeps on changing her mind.
Take for example, Mikagami. How would he react if she tells him that the woman he had known was already nothing but torn pieces of a puzzle? That she thought of these desires about him?
No, she can't bear it. No, no.
I know the moments are stolen and sneaked
Maybe I should've never peeked
Into her new life, she had gotten so well
But how would I forget the way we loved?
That day, under the cherry blossom tree, she went pondering about her life as well as her past, her happiness, her destiny as a former fighter and now a lone, pointless orphan.
Since the day she found out about her tragic family destruction, she has grown weaker and weaker each day, her body succumbing helplessly to every twinge of pain she feels, whether physically or emotionally. She felt more and more sleepy…
The next thing she knew, a gentle but manly voice was calling her name, willing her to wake.
Then, she fluttered her eyes open and saw a worried and solemn man with disheveled snow wisps enter her vision.
A smile crept her lips.
"Mi-chan…did you buy the drinks?"
Then, her eyes flew to the bottles rolling feebly on the ground…
…then diverted to the towering man who stared seriously at her, one arm raised to the side of her head and holding the trunk of the colossal cherry tree as if to break it.
"Mi-chan…what is it?"
But I knew better.
"Kirisawa…god, don't play innocent anymore, you know what happened!"
Innocent chocolate eyes met fiery silver glare.
The statement was hapless and short but it held too much.
I continued gawking at him naively, to gauge how much he knew.
A loud, boisterous voice intruded in the grave moment.
Spiky, black hair donned my sight as a lean man bodice dropped from the tree above us.
He nodded in recognition.
"So, let's go to the arcade and continue our little fight!"
"Ah…gomen, Recca. I have to review for our long test tomorrow…"
That was a pathetic lie. I just need a breather, goddamn.
His face saddened. "Okay, see you some other time…"
I turned my back to leave.
…Not before overhearing their soft words.
"You really intended this." A fiery, masculine tone.
"Never tell her." A snide.
I closed my eyes firmly as I tried to shut all thoughts out of my troubled mind…even just for a while…
I'd lie, yes I'll do
If it meant heaven with you
I'd lie, I would, no doubt
A certain bishounen turned white pale as he saw a hunched, woman form crouched on the corner of the hall, hair strands here and there, uniform ripped and crumpled, things spilling from her bag…
Incoherent sobs. Indistinguishable cries that welled within him.
The immediate reaction was to jump to her and stop her from crying, which he heeded. The ivory fair face looked up at him, extreme anguish and bitterness mirrored in her eyes, her cheeks tearstained.
She said nothing. But she did cry over and over again in his loving arms as he made soothing sounds to caress her distressed soul.
He asked, but he almost knew.
She was a perfect little angel
Her wings of soft pastel shades
But when she found her life as a fraught
She had lost her will to live
In a brink of time and bitter fate she was caught
"I…I love him…"
His eyes widened and his brows almost left his forehead.
"No…" a pained cry.
He had to be brave for her; she had to stay strong in his resolve for her sake. She never needed him more than now.
"Shush…" he hushed her. "Everything will be alright, you now hime and I are here for you…"
She sobbed her heart out. Recca has always been a trusted friend. Even though it was ridiculous.
"He…he…" she stopped between weeps. "HE…"
"Calm down…take your time…"
She breathed deeply. "I…I was just…strolling outside for a-air…then…he, h-he came, I wasn't even thinking…I…I dragged him…and…told him…"
She broke down. Recca checked her face gently for slaps or inflammation…
…until he noticed her lips, which were swollen red…
"Uh huh?" she opened her eyes and met gentle cerulean orbs staring down at her.
"Are you alright?"
"Daijobu…daijobu." The frantic shrill was off her eyes when he saw him beside her, comforting her best as he could.
A hand crept slowly, with trepidation, to hers.
…then, fingers were intertwined.
He placed a finger on her lips.
"I know" he said looking at her. "I know."
Turning his back as a silent permission for them to leave the scenery, the two walked soundlessly into the dark hallway.
"I always loved you too, Fuuko Kirisawa."
A/N: I thank everybody who reviewed on Guardian. Thank you, thank you!
So, as promised, I edited it! I hope it's less confusing now. For full explanation, please check my profile, it's there. Thank you all for the reviews, I acknowledge everybody in my profile! I really love you all! Too much for an amateur like me, thank you for your time and effort!
Nope, it was never on Fuuko's POV. If you'll observe it, she never used the word 'me' or 'I'. I always wrote 'she' or 'her'. I was speaking out her feelings. Yeah, me too, I got a li'l confused .
And the italic verses were meant to be like breaks between scenes. I meant it to be like commercial breaks on TV shows, did'ya get it? Well, I hope so. Sorry for confusing you all. The cherry blossom tree scene was taken from Cardcaptor Sakura (I forgot the episode number XD)
Thanks to you all! I really appreciate all your reviews!