Okay, I lied. This chapter was supposed to be called 'Shakira Shakira!', but since a couple people already voted for Aro's car exploding, I had no choice but the write this chapter.

And I forgot what was supposed to be in the 'Shakira Shakira!' chapter. But that's beside the point.

Disco Inferno

"Good god." Demitri whispered, staring down blankly at Felix attempting to do 'the worm'. 'Attempting' being the key word.

"Is he…."

"But there…" The two vampires turned to give one another a bewildered look, each shaking their heads in disbelief. Demitri spoke first.

"Is it just me, or does it look like he's trying to, you know, impregnate the stage?" Marcus gave the guard a look of utter revulsion.

"Honestly Demitri!"

"Don't tell me that it's not what it looks like he's doing!! You know who were thinking that too!" Demitri huffed. Marcus shook his head.

"Well at least I for one have the decency not to say it out loud!" The two began to argue about not saying things versus saying things, when the topic shifted to how much Brittany Spears sucked.

"She's pitiful." Marcus offered, cringing as Felix began singing her number one lamest song, 'Hit Me Baby One More Time' again.

"No Marcus, she's TERRIBLE." Demitri retorted, now wishing he was deaf. Marcus opened his mouth to tell the vamp just how pitiful she was when Alec decided to walk by.

"She's a poor excuse for an icon and a mother, and she's been to the looney bin more times than she knows how to count-not that she knows how to count- and her own sons have been taken away from her and can't see them anymore. Yet Felix apparently thinks differently." He spat, wincing at Felix's now high pitched wail.

"She's an American pop artist, what do you expect?" Gianna –now back at her desk- stated, pleased with the fact that she could breathe again.

"I'd watch what you say if I were you, some American might be nearby and will somehow magically know everything we're saying." Caius muttered, glancing around him warily.

"Yeah right, like some American is actually witnessing this and will go on a rampage about how where's tearing apart Brittany Spears like a bunch of old ladies with nothing better to do than knit?" Demitri rolled his eyes as he continued. "Yeah right."

"You never know……They don't even have to be an American to go after you for this……" Caius whispered back, running to the throne room. Gianna yawned, reclining in her chair.

"That had to be one of the stupidest and one of the most unnecessary conversations that's ever taken place here in the castle." Marcus said flatly, glaring down at the screaming Felix down below, who had now decided to try crowd surfing, jumping into the mass only for people to scream and jump out of the way, which made Felix fall to the ground. Marcus winced. "That had to hurt…" He said under his breath as Demitri spoke again.

"You try spending more than two minutes in a room with a sugar high Felix and then come to me talking about random conversations." Marcus gave a serious Demitri a confused look as the guard nodded. Alec shivered.

"You don't even want to know about the time that Felix decided to give Jane and me THE TALK." Another shiver ran up the boy's spine as he thought back to the week before when Felix had sat down with Alec who was busy watching Jane who had been busy torturing random people walking by the grounds. Marcus and Demitri grimaced.

"I though Aro gave you the talk." Marcus whispered. If it could, Alec's face would have gotten even paler.

"He did." Demitri blinked, taking awe back before a shiver ran down his spine.

"OH GOD." Gianna sat up at this, shaking her head violently.

"I'm so scarred for life now, so scarred…" Marcus gave the secretary an incredulous look as Felix's music was abruptly cut off.

"You've lived with vampires for almost the past decade and you're just now scarred for life?!"

"Well none of them have been having the talk before!!!!!" She shot back at one of the Volturi leaders. Alec in turn shot a nervous glance around the room as Demitri watched Gianna and Marcus bicker, somewhat amused and enjoying the lack of irritating –and un-liked- pop music.

Without warning, Caius shot into the room, a frantic look on his face. Everyone else in the room now had their attention watch him, expecting something horrible. The obnoxious ring of the phone by Gianna interrupted the silence. She turned to answer the phone when Caius began to speak to the three vampires in a hushed voice.

"Come with me, and hurry please." He started, his gaze flickering over the three before him. "Felix is gone." Demitri smacked his head against the stone wall hard, leaving an indent.

"DID YOU JUST REALIZE THAT?!?!?!" He yelled, glaring at the white haired vamp.

"NO! I just-"

"ARGH!" Demitri bashed his head against the wall as Alec started to run to the throne room and toward the large window that looked down at the south side of the castle. The alley behind the castle was covered in a large shadow, blocking the Volturi's many cars from view of passerby. He squinted, ignoring Demitri and Caius yelling at each other when he noticed a dark figure hunched over by Aro's newest shiny ride, a faint orange glow beside him as he bent over the hood.

"DDDDDEEEEMMMMMMIIIITTTTRRRRIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!" Alec yelled, quickly dragging Demitri, Marcus and Caius over, gesturing toward the window. "The window." He stated, still shocked.

"Yes Alec, window. Very good." Demitri grunted, the rest of his snide remark cut over by Gianna's yell.

"DEMITRI!" He turned to walk back into the hallway. Alec yelled.

"DEMITRI!" He turned to walk back to the window.

"DEMITRI!" Hissing, he turned again to walk to Gianna.

"FELIX!" Marcus yelled, punching the glass panes. He immediately proceeded to push the rest of the glass away, gesturing for everyone else to come over. Gianna ran into the room. Marcus jumped out into the air, quickly followed by Caius and Alec. Demitri got up on the sill, and out of the window just in time for Gianna to yell,

"Heidi's been arrested for speeding!"

Demitri gasped, but found himself unable to go back into the throne room, since he was now free falling down onto the parking lot. Marcus, Caius, and Alec had been able to land gracefully on the ground between two cars, and Demitri soon found out that he wasn't going to be as lucky.

With a startled yelp, he collided with the hood of Heidi's car, yet quickly jumped off to run with the others over to where Felix was, now pulling away from Aro's car, smirking.

Demitri ran at him, but gasped when Marcus reached out and yanked him back by pulling on his hood. Felix jumped up and smirked as he ran over to them, diving just in time.

The four vampires –minus the one who was giggling uncontrollably on the ground- stood in awed silence, watching Aro's car erupt into a fireball, shooting up into the air only to crash back down loudly a few seconds later.

"Well thank god-" Demitri began to say, trailing off as the car next to Aro's burning one caught on fire, which set another car on fire, which caused a chain reaction. "-No other cars were destroyed…" he finished, running to the only fireproof spot with the others, where Felix now stood.

They all glared at him, while he merely stood rooted to the spot, laughing, smiling –doing the disco -badly- -, and singing with the siren wails that wer steadily going closer,

"Burn baby burn, disco inferno!"


-sighs- And it could have been so much better….Ah well, at least something was set on fire.

So Heidi's been arrested, so that means…

One down, ...quite a few to go.

This should be amusing. –evil grin-