Disclaimer: I don't own Deathnote. I'm obviously not as amazing as Ohba and Obata. Also, Matt would have gotten a lot more exposure if I had been in charge. He didn't even get explained TT He just showed up and then got killed off when he ceased being useful….

Rating: T... For a few bad words.


Summary: Mello didn't REALLY love chocolate, Matt realized one day…

Mello didn't really love chocolate.

Matt came to this conclusion as he sat playing DS on the couch one day. (It was Pokemon Diamond version. Mello would've laughed, but something about those furry little creatures was irresistible.) It jut came to him all of a sudden… Mello really didn't LOVE it.

He SAID he loved chocolate. He always liked to keep chocolate on hand, keep it handy in case he needed some. He NEEDED chocolate sometimes.

But need and love weren't synonymous.

Mello DEVOURED chocolate. It was a treat to his lips, his teeth, and his tongue… tasting and nipping at chocolate, savoring its flavor….. Mello got great enjoyment out of it. But when he finished, he simply threw away the wrapper and moved on to whatever else he was doing.

What if chocolate loved Mello? Did Mello ever stop to think about the candy's feelings? Did he ever think, 'I love you, Chocolate,' as he devoured it?

Matt bet he didn't.

Well Chocolate wasn't going to sit around and TAKE that! Chocolate wasn't going to let itself get USED by the blonde when it was convenient, and then let him run off on some crazy-ass mission and nearly get himself killed without ever thinking of the consequences…. Chocolate wasn't going to sit back and take it when he seduced some bimbo from the SPK and then complacently listen to him explain, "It's for information, I swear. She means nothing to me." Chocolate was going to STAND UP FOR ITSELF!!! Chocolate was going to TELL MELLO HOW IT FELT ONCE AND FOR ALL!!!!!

Matt had stormed into the kitchen, threw open the pantry and set upon emancipating every bar of the sweet that he could find. He would give them freedom through destruction. He grabbed the Godiva, hurled the Hershey's, stomped the Snickers, mashed the mars bars, cursed the Cadbury, kicked the Kisses, messed up the Milky Ways, abused the Almond Joys and ground the Ghirardelli to a pulp. He even flung the Ferero Roche across the living room.

Of course, it was then that Mello strolled his happy ass through the door. He dropped the bags of groceries and cried out.


Oh. Goddamn.

Matt bit down on his cigarette and yelled out. "You don't DESERVE this chocolate! It's BETTER OFF WITHOUT YOU!!!!"

"What the flying fu-".

"You don't APPRECIATE chocolate!" Matt interrupted. "You TAKE IT FOR GRANTED! Look at all chocolate has DONE for you! Chocolate would DIE for you! Chocolate probably WILL die for you!!!!!"

Mello looked at the redhead as though he had lost his mind. Which he probably had.

"Matt… chocolate isn't alive. It can't die."

Matt looked down at the sweets scattered all over the floor. "That's not the point."

Mello eyed his friend and occasional lover for a long time before bending down to pick up some of his beloved confections. "I damn well appreciate…chocolate. Y-, Chocolate doesn't have to throw a FIT about it."

"It doesn't seem like it," Matt mumbled.

"Look, I may not tell… chocolate this often enough, but without chocolate I couldn't do anything. I'm dependent on it. I guess… when I don't have chocolate, I crave it."

Matt looked at the cigarette that had been in his mouth. The filter was bitten almost all the way through. "So… would you say you… loved chocolate?"

"I guess I do," Mello muttered.

Mat sat down his wasted smoke and began picking up the mess he'd made. "I'm - uh, CHOCOLATE is sorry."

Mello leaned over and claimed the redhead's lips with his own, sliding his tongue along Matt's lips as though tasting him. When the kiss ended, he flashed a sexy grin.

"You're forgiven, chocolate."

A/N:3 I can't help it. I got hooked on this pair after reading volumes nine, ten and twelve…. Poor Matt! He's such a minor character XD I'm surprised how big a fan base he has… and I'm part of it, heehee!!! I hope y'all enjoyed. This is my first humor fic in a while and my VERY FIRST MELLOMATT!

R&R, of course.