Where Do We Go From Here?

Authors Note: I know…I'm a horrible person who can't update and deserves to be put in the stocks and forced to watch only Riley's face on repeat for the rest of my life. But that would be cruel and unusual punishment!!! So to avoid having my eyeballs bleed, I'm just going to try and split up the chapters in my head and therefore make things shorter and faster to type. I'm a college student…it's hard to get a spare moment. As I type this I am in Oceanography class learning about "Depositional shorelines"…seriously. I hope you enjoy!!!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, I wouldn't have to play with it now…Plus Spike would be handcuffed to my bed…also he may have been allowed to eat my roommate.

Chapter 8: LA or Bust

Spike's heart stopped. Or it would have if it had been beating. L.A. She wanted to go and see Angel and she was dragging him along for the bloody trip. Tears stung the back of light blue eyes, but Spike pushed them back in favor of the burning rage that was sweeping trough his veins. He rounded on the Slayer, getting ready to tell her that she could visit the poof on her own time, and that he wasn't going to sit in the front seat while they made out like a couple of randy teenagers. But one look at Buffy's face stopped him in this tracks and made him close his mouth, his teeth closing painfully on his tongue, drawing blood. She was so lost. Tears swam in her eyes, and a slight cloud had passed over her beautiful face. She was lost and scared and had no idea what the hell was going on. Spike couldn't begrudge the girl anything. As though she knew his thoughts, she looked up at him with confusion evident in her jade green eyes. "Please Spike…this is important to me." Spike nodded tersely and glanced down at the route they would have to take. He had no idea what lay in store for them.

After Spike had planned the trip, memorizing every stop, he tossed Buffy the keys to his Desoto. She caught them effortlessly and glanced at them. "We're taking your car?" Spike cocked an eyebrow at her. "We're definitely not taking Rups car. I can't stand that sodding thing." She glanced back at Giles' car and figured if it was going to be safe anywhere, it was going to be the cemetery. She'd make sure to call Willow later and let her know it was there. She walked around the back of Spike's crypt and saw his Desoto looking the same as it had so long ago. "Where the hell do you keep this thing?" Spike smiled at her. "Well it 's a long story pet. You'll have to meet a mate of mine sometime, names Clem. He likes to keep the thing, makes him feel special. Course now he's got this bloody awful Volkswagen thing Can't stand that car. It's all small and cramped. I get in it and my knees are up to my eyeballs!" Buffy smiled slightly and Spike was glad that the confusion didn't seem to be drowning her anymore. She was simply wading in it now. He slid into the passenger's seat and Buffy took his lead and slid into the driver's seat, panic starting to become evident on her face. Spike looked at her. "Start the car Buffy."

Se nodded and started the car, her breaths becoming faster with every move she made, until she was practically hyperventilating. Spike looked at her and could feel her heartbeat increase, until it was pounding in his ears. He wished that her heartbeats sudden increase was due to proximity to him, not the fact that she had started a car, but he pushed the thoughts aside to focus on her. "Slayer, look at me." She spared him a quick glance before her knuckles tightened even more on the steering wheel. "Buffy." Spike's voice held a silent command. And this time she turned and looked at him. He grabbed her chin in his hand, his grip not gentle at all. His bright blue eyes held something that she didn't even try to understand as they bore into her own. "Look in my eyes pet. Be in my eyes." Se nodded and the light blue color filled her soul. They reminded her of water. Clear, light blue water that lapped upon a golden beach under a warm summer sun. They were beautiful. A feeling of calm washed over Buffy and she smiled lightly at Spike. He nodded at her. "Now, feel the car." Her eyebrows started to crinkle in confusion but Spike stopped her. "No love, don't think. Just feel. Feel how it moves." His eyes were staring into hers again, and she let his words wash over her. "Imagine that the car is a body. The vibrations of the motor are the breathing of a human. That soft noise you hear is the heartbeat. Feel the car Buffy. Breathe with the car. Let the feeling wash over you." Buffy's eyes slowly shut until her breathing and heartbeat had calmed to an almost resting rate. Spike tried to memorize the way Buffy looked right now. Her eyes closed as though she was sleeping, her lips relaxed into an almost smile, her hair cascading down her shoulders, the gentle rise and fall of her breasts with every breath she took. Her heartbeat a gentle lullaby that sang to him all the promises he knew it couldn't ever fulfill. "Open your eyes Buffy." Buffy's eyes slowly opened and the look in them made Spike speechless. There was perfect peace in them. He could see a taste of the Heaven that had enveloped Buffy. She smiled at him and Spike wondered if he had died and this was Heaven. Had Buffy already wrecked the car and killed them both? He knew it wasn't Heaven because he didn't think that was exactly where he was headed come his final day. Buffy looked at him and some of the Heaven started to seep from her eyes but her look was still full of the calm and understanding that had filled them. "I'm ready Spike."


Most of the trip was uneventful. Spike had to keep reminding Buffy what the speed limit was, but for the most part she was a perfectly adequate driver. She stayed on the side of caution and for that Spike was grateful. They chatted about small things, avoiding everything that they knew would upset the other. They talked mostly about Dawn and how she was doing in school. It seems Spike knew more than Buffy did about Dawn's situation and she simply listened while he told her how much her sister had changed. Finally they saw the sign, and entered L.A. Both of them dreaded what would happen in this town, but for very different reasons.