A Broken Angel
Ok this is my first attempt at writing a fanfic ever so I would like to see some constructed criticism to help with my future chapters and other fanfics.
Summary: after Hinatas lose at the chunin preliminaries to Neji, her father disowns her, luckily Kurenai was the one to pick up and mend a broken Hinata in her time of need. Unfortunately Hiashi is not happy that Kurenai is here new guardian and is making it hard for both of them.
Rating might go up if I get a lemon in with Kurenai and Asuma or maybe Kakashi which do you think?
Disclaimer: no I don't own Naruto and sadly I never will.
Chapter 1
It was a cloudy afternoon in Konoha. Kurenai sat by Hinata as she lay asleep in her hospital bed. It had been one week since the chunin exam preliminaries, in which Hinata had lost her match to her cousin Neji.
Hinata still had a little difficulty breathing but the medics said she would be just fine if she took it easy and got plenty of rest for the next few weeks and they might be able to release her in a week or so to rest at home.
Kurenai couldn't help but feel this was partly her fault, "I should have never let her fight Neji", she thought to herself, "but then again, if she hadn't she would have never stood up for herself like that, I had never seen such a look of determination and fierceness in her eyes before".
"I'm so proud of you Hinata-chan", Kurenai said aloud, and kissed her on the forehead. At that moment Hinatas father, Hyuuga Hiashi entered the room, Kurenai looked back at him with a frown.
"It's been a week since Hinata has been in the hospital, it really took you this long to come and see her"? Kurenai asked with a hint of anger in her voice.
"Yes it has", said Hiashi with the same tone and frown Kurenai had given him. "Well I wanted to talk with her about something important but I guess I will have to wait until
She is released from the hospital, well then I best be going if she is not awake". And with that Hiashi exited the room.
Kurenai and Hiashi always had tension between them; after all they were an item a few years back when Hinata was little, but things didn't end up well between them, they ended up having a huge fight and never spoke to each other until Kurenai became Hinatas sensei, which Hiashi was not very happy about at the time but Kurenai was very happy about this, after all she had taken care of Hinata when her and Hiashi were dating although Hinata was a little too young to remember this.
I can't stand that man; Kurenai thought to herself, I wonder what he wanted to talk to Hinata about, well whatever it is it can't be good, not after what I heard about the branch family laughing behind the main branches back because Neji, a branch family member was able to defeat the clan's heir. Kurenai sat in her train of thought for a few minutes until a nurse came in to check on Hinata and told Kurenai visiting hours were over.
Kurenai thought it would be best to speak to the Hokage about the situation, so she started to make her way to his office. Kurenai got there and knocked on the door and entered. "Good afternoon Hokage-sama, I came to speak to you about Hinata".
The Hokage gestured for her to take a seat and she continued. "I'm worried that Hinatas father is going to banish her as the clan's heir and abandon her, I have been worried for quite some time but because of her lose to her cousin in the chunin exams it has become a growing concern for me".
"Yes I understand your concern; if you like you can sign some documents so that if this shall happen you will automatically become Hinatas guardian". And with that Kurenai signed the documents, thanked the Hokage and went home feeling a little better about the situation, but knew if things did turn out this way it would not be easy for Hinata and she was sure Hiashi wouldn't be pleased with her if she became Hinatas guardian.
So people how do you like my first fanfic so far? I hope its ok for now, ill update a.s.a.p.!
Please rate and review, thx!