Kohaku and Rin discover Fanfiction
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha and if I did this story would be in the show!
A/N: This is an oneshot where Rin and Kohaku learn about fanfictions. It takes place after the anime and into the Manga after Kohaku meets up with Kikyo. Kohaku/Rin
A/N: Remember this is humorous. I don't like Yaoi, Yuri or Sess/Rin and Kohaku/Kikyo pairings. There are certain pairings that are made fun of in this oneshot and those four things are among them. If you like those pairings then you are free to read them but do not Flame. Thank you and enjoy the story!
Kohaku sliced the branches off of a large tree and cut some shrubbery as he walked into a small alcove. "I was supposed to meet Rin here…I hope I'm not late!" He thought silently. Kohaku walked in the center of the small cave and looked around. "She's not here yet…Good. I think that means I'm actually on time, of course she's never late." Kohaku put some wood on the ground and started a fire. He sighed as he walked over to the wall and sat down.
"Kohaku, I'm here!" Rin exclaimed as she ran into the cave. "Sorry I'm late!" Kohaku looked up and smiled.
"Oh don't worry about it Rin."
"Well now I have the same excuse as you. I had to find some way to get away from Lord Sesshomaru!" Rin sighed as she sat next to Kohaku and looked into the fire. "He keeps asking where I'm going and stuff. Telling me I better not be going out with any boys that he doesn't know about."
"Sesshomaru is really protective of you, isn't he?"
"Well I would imagine…I am just a 'child' so I'm not yet as 'experienced' as he is."
"Yeah, Kikyo gets like that as well. She usually wants me to tell her what I'm doing or where I'm going! Sesshomaru and Kikyo don't even like each other."
"I'm thirteen and you're sixteen now, we should be allowed to do whatever we want! We are adults right?"
"Kikyo always tells me that I might find something that can really mess with my brain if I'm not careful and I go off by myself. I've been doing that already for a long time; I think I'm perfectly capable of handling myself. Don't you?"
"Yeah Kohaku, I agree with you."
"I saw Kagome leaving the cave a little while ago with Inuyasha. I heard a lot of laughing so I listened in and they were telling jokes."
"What kind of jokes?"
"I don't know. They were talking about Kikyo and Koga and several other people. I didn't see anything but I know I saw Kagome carry some papers inside." Rin nodded and looked over to see a large number of papers in a stack.
"Are these papers what she had?" Kohaku looked over and nodded. Rin put all the papers in a stack and took the top paper off. "What are 'fanfictions' Kohaku?"
"What? Let me see that." Kohaku took the paper from Rin and read the words.
"Fanfictions are stories written by fans about their favorite shows and pairings. Side note: Tell Inuyasha about these, he will love this!"
"I think somebody writes about people," Rin said quietly as she glanced at the first sheet on the stack. "I also think they're about us!"
"What, are we some sort of story to these people?"
"Yeah, it's our life…" Rin took the paper off the stack and read the pairing. "This is about Sango and Miroku!"
"What! Give me that!" Rin showed the story to Kohaku and he chuckled softly to himself. "I always did say they liked each other."
"Those two do make a good couple, I believe that."
"I would support that couple, or as they seem to call it in fanfictions, a pairing."
"Right, well it seems that the people who write these know what they're talking about! Or else they would have dared to put Inuyasha and Sango together!" Kohaku shuddered and looked at the stack of papers.
"What is yaoi? There's also some yuri…"
"Let's see, here's a paper on yaoi. I'll read it!" Rin said with a smile.'I love you so much Inuyasha! Don't die!' Miroku exclaimed. Inuyasha walked over to Miroku and embraced him. 'I promise you Miroku, when I have defeated Naraku I will come back to marry you.'"Rin and Kohaku choked and dropped the paper.
"Yaoi sucks!" Kohaku shouted. "That came out wrong! What's yuri?" Kohaku picked up a sheet of paper and read it. 'Sango decided to show her what being a woman was all about. She picked up little Rin and slowly caressed her…'"' Kohaku stopped reading and looked over to Rin and blushed.
"What? What's the rest?"
"What!" Rin grabbed the paper and ripped it to shreds. "That is just sick!"
"Not to mention illegal isn't it?"
"I'm a minor here people!"
"That's my…sister…" Rin sighed and found all the papers labeled yaoi and Yuri. She quickly separated them from the stack.
"This is one heck of an interesting thing to find when you're on a date…I do notneed anyone reading that stuff about me!"
"Yeah…Let's move to something more interesting." Rin turned and glared at Kohaku.
"Are you saying I'm not interesting?"
"No, nothing like that at all!"
"You better not say I'm a lesbian attracted to your sister either!" Kohaku gulped silently as Rin took another sheet of paper off the stack labeled yaoi. "Let me read this off for you, Kohaku! 'Sango watched as Miroku would heal Kohaku's wounds. Miroku felt of the boy's legs and slowly…' Yeah that's as far as I'm going…" Kohaku was shaking horribly.
"You are a cruel woman Rin." Kohaku stood up and used his scythe to destroy all the yaoi and Yuri papers. "The nerve of these people…That's my sister's boyfriend, that and I am far from liking other guys!"
"Calm down Kohaku, I'm sure we can find something good in this stack…"
"I'll pick from the stack this time." Kohaku grimaced as he tried to get the images out of his head. "Here's an Inuyasha and Kagome pairing! 'So Naraku had been defeated. Inuyasha held onto Kagome as she cried bitter tears. "I know you have to leave Kagome, but remember that I will do anything for you." Kagome looked up and smiled softly "Thank you Inuyasha, I…I'll always love you.'"
"Well that was…sweet," Rin said quietly. "I guess they do make a good match."
"I don't know," Kohaku said as he set the paper aside. "I mean sure, I guess…Kagome isn't really suited for this time though, she's got her own time to get back too. What about the butterfly effect thing?"
"Well scientifically speaking the theory is that if one from the future steps on a butterfly in the past then a change will happen in the future. I'm sure Kagome has ancestors here so if she were to meet them then wouldn't that be a problem? What if the ancestors don't like how she looks and decide not to pair up because of it!" Rin blinked and sighed.
"You think too much…Look here's one where Miroku and Sango are Kagome's ancestors."
"What if Inuyasha was her ancestor!"
"Then she would not want to pair up with him…I can see that as a bad thing." Kohaku nodded.
"Incest is a wretched thing," They said at the same time. Rin picked up another paper and smiled. "This one is an Inuyasha and Kikyo pairing!" Kohaku nodded briskly.
"That wouldn't be a horrible pairing, but she is but a clay body isn't she?"
"She would shoot you for that statement Kohaku." Kohaku looked at a paper and frowned. "What, what did you see now?"
"Kikyo and Miroku…"
"Ouch, that's just sick and wrong. It's not horrible but isn't completely obvious who Miroku belongs to?"
"It's made deathly obvious." Rin nodded as she looked at a page that was off to the side, it was labeled "statistics."
"It says here that Sango and Miroku have more pairings together than any other Inuyasha couple."
"Oh, well that's great! There's no other couple that belongs together more than those two. Now if Naraku will just die so my sister doesn't have to worry about Miroku dying from the wind tunnel! Honestly, sometimes I wonder why Miroku hasn't actually given her a child yet so she at least has something to love and remember him by. If I die and he dies…then my sister will be devastated!"
"Good point there Kohaku, there's another here where they've got Kagome with Sesshomaru."
"I'd say that's likeable, it's probably not the best choice because again the time thing comes into play. There are things that could go wrong when someone from the future does anything with someone from the past."
"Yeah well Kagome's a girl. She could just go back to her own time with a baby inside of her and everything would be fine."
"Are women really like that?" Rin looked at Kohaku and flashed an evil grin. "You scare me sometimes; you do know that, right?"
"You love me anyway Kohaku."
"Yeah that's true." Rin took several papers from the stack and set them aside.
"That's the incest pile."
"Oh dear god, brother and brother, sister and sister?"
"That's what incest means."
"I will quickly dispose of those." Kohaku stood and sliced the stack to shreds and sat down with a sigh. "Some people and their sick cravings…"
"I think Kagome brought these from the future."
"I wonder if she's told stories about us…Probably, since there are so many fanfictions about us."
"Yeah, I think it's all worldwide as well." Rin looked to a page and smiled, but still with a frown. "Hey look, it's Sesshomaru and Kikyo."
"I hope that never happens, because then we would become siblings."
"There is incest involved if that happens then…Then we'd be committing the incest!" Rin's eyes widened and Kohaku hugged her.
"Think different thoughts, we are not brother and sister, remember that."
"Yeah, hey what do you think about all the Shippo and Kirara's?" Kohaku raised his eyebrow.
"How the hell does that work?"
"I don't know…Kirara is a cat and Shippo is something else. That's like…bestiality…"
"You could put it that way…" Kohaku lifted a paper off the pile and smiled. "Now here's a good one, Sesshomaru and Kagura."
"Oh they go great together!" Rin said quickly. "Too bad Kagura had to die…Jaken tells me that he can feel Sesshomaru's tears that he would shed if he ever actually cried. Lord Sesshomaru never cries, but I can tell he's not entirely devoid of feeling."
"The same could be said about Kikyo. Now if you're wondering about really gross…" Kohaku had a grin on his face as he lifted a sheet of paper. "Check out Rin and Jaken!"'
"What the hell! In some ways he's like a brother to me…I mean…but…That is just SICK. Not only that, but Sesshomaru would have my head for something like that."
"No, Sesshomaru wouldn't do that to you, he'd just assume Jaken raped you and then he'd kill Jaken." Kohaku and Rin nodded and moved their eyes back to the stack.
"It's strange; I don't see very many, if any fanfictions about us!"
"That is odd…I mean, we're a true couple, almost as true out there as Miroku and Sango."
"I guess people just don't see it…"
"How can they not see it? This is just disturbing." Rin chuckled softly and kissed Kohaku on the cheek.
"Kohaku, we hide our relationship enough from the adults so it's safe to assume we are not that known."
"That's true, and I don't need a bunch of papers here telling me who it is that I love. I love you Rin, that's just the known fact."
"You know, I saw a paper in the pile with Naraku and Sango…"
"What was that…?"
"Well let's see…" Rin read the paper in her hand. "It ends as Miroku and Sango though."
"Okay, good, my God for a minute there I was afraid-"
"Naraku is the bad guy of this story and it says here that he raped Sango."
"What the hell! I'll kill the SOB! The bastard is dead!" Rin smiled softly and grabbed Kohaku's arm. She quickly pulled him back to the ground.
"Don't make any kind of scene; you know you can't take on Naraku completely by yourself. Don't you dare go fighting him because I don't want to lose you."
"Yeah, sorry…Let me see this though." Kohaku took the paper and set it aside. He looked at the stack and raised his eyebrow. "You didn't get rid of all the yaoi. There's a Naraku and Inuyasha one. Oh that is just hilarious and disturbing." Kohaku took the paper and set it aside. Let me see all the Naraku pairings that there are." Kohaku went through the papers, "Naraku and Inuyasha; wrong. Naraku and Miroku; disturbing, sick and definitely not right. Naraku and Kagome; such a bastard. Naraku and Sesshomaru; that is just hilarious. Naraku and Shippo; what the hell? Naraku and Sango; die bastard. Naraku and Rin; WHAT THE HELL! I'LL KILL THE BASTARD!!!" Rin stared at Kohaku wide eyed and then sighed.
"Relax Kohaku, it didn't happen."
"I so want that guy too come here right now…"
"Hey what's all this talk about me?" A voice asked. Rin and Kohaku raised their eyebrows and looked over to Naraku who had walked into the cave. They watched Naraku slowly walk toward them and cross his arms. "Why are you two talking about me?"
"How did you find this cave?" Kohaku asked as he placed his hand on his weapon.
"I followed the jewel shard."
"Oh…Hey Naraku, I have something to 5show you!" Kohaku stood up with the papers in his hand and grinned. "Read these!" Naraku raised his eyebrow and snatched the papers. He slowly read every story, his eyes growing wider with every word.
"Oh, crap…" Naraku begin to glow deep crimson. Soon he was so red that the he exploded, literally dying from embarrassment. Somewhere far away Miroku took off his glove and realized that his wind tunnel was gone.
"Wow…who knew all it took was a few lame stories from the future," Kohaku said grimly.
"Hey Kohaku, look at this…It's…you and Kikyo…"
"Holy crap!" Kohaku's eyes were wide as he walked over to the stack of papers. He took a sheet out of Rin's hands.
"Kikyo placed her arms around Kohaku's neck and slowly pressed her lips against his. 'Kohaku, this way I will give you my spiritual power and we can remove the shard from your neck. Only, you must be at the highest emotional state for it to work.' Kohaku kissed her lips in return."
"T-That's just…" Kohaku quickly ran over to a small plant inside the cave and proceeded to vomit into the plant. He walked back to the stack and dared to pick up one more sheet of paper.
"Jaken was away so they had the entire night to themselves. 'Lord Sesshomaru, what do you want to do today?' Rin asked. Sesshomaru looked at Rin with the look that she loved. She flushed a deep crimson as Sesshomaru embraced her in his arms. 'Lord Sesshomaru?' Slowly he kissed Rin and brought his lips up. With his hand he fondled her breast, 'Oh, Lord Sesshomaru!' Rin moaned…"
"You can stop reading now Kohaku!" Rin exclaimed with wide eyes and a face that was slowly turning green.
"There's still room behind the green plant over there," Kohaku said as he pointed toward the plant that he called the vomit plant." Rin quickly ran over and puked as Kohaku saw another Kikyo and Kohaku pairing. Quickly he found himself beside Rin.
"That's just gross!"
"Oh dear God…Do these people have no sense of awareness at all?"
"That's the same damn thing as incest!"
"Yeah, as we said before…Incest is a bad thing!" Soon Kohaku and Rin found themselves sitting on the wall of the cave. Kohaku was staring blankly into the fire as Rin started sobbing in his chest.
"Why, why do they write such things? Sesshomaru is like my father! He literally adopted me and raised me. Hell he is my father!"
"Kikyo…my only mother figure…How on earth can they expect me to…Oh my…" The statistic page showed many Sesshomaru and Rin pairings, Rin did not want to see that. "She always told me there might be something wrong that I'd find if I snuck out."
"Damn that Kagome…Someone needs to talk to her about what she brings here. Don't blow up like Naraku did, please."
"If I can get the images out of my head then I'll be fine…"
"I need images out of mine!" Kohaku slowly stood up and helped Rin to her feet. They looked over when they heard a gasp. They saw Kagome standing in front of the cave.
"Kohaku and Rin? What are you two doing here; you didn't read those papers did you?" Kagome chuckled nervously. "Children shouldn't read things like that…"
"Leave now…Leave before I'm tempted to slaughter you for the images you've brought into Rin's head!" Kohaku exclaimed as he slowly raised his scythe.
"Well they're not really my stories…"
"It makes no damn difference! You brought them here! Rin does not have incest with her adoptive father and I don't have incest with the person that is a motherly figure!"
"Heh, sorry about that…But are you two like…An item or something?"
"An item, we are no item!"
"You're not? So it's not that devastating then…"
"You idiot! If you meant relationship then yes we are indeed a relationship. Now get your sick, disturbing and perverted mind out of here before I kill you!" Kagome nodded and ran out of the cave. Kohaku quickly took the papers and tossed them into the fire. He then took Rin who was still sobbing some and held her in an embrace. Kagome looked into the cave and smiled softly.
"Kohaku and Rin, they make a sweet pair."
"Rin, it's okay, the papers are gone. None of those are real and they never will be, okay?"
"I know Kohaku, but it's just…I have these images in my head now and they can't be taken away." Kohaku smiled softly and lifted Rin's face to look into her eyes. As Rin gazed into his strong eyes she felt herself in a mesmerizing trance. Kohaku pulled her body close, causing Rin to nearly melt. She felt warm in his powerful arms; she knew that he would not let her go.
"Rin, you know I love you don't you?"
"Yes Kohaku…I love you so much…" Kohaku held his hand under Rin's chin and wiped away a tear with his thumb. "Kohaku, do you think that you could…Well…I can't believe I'm asking this but I want…" Kohaku silenced her with a smile as he lowered his head and pressed his lips against her soft and tender lips. She felt her body shift with relaxation as the warmth of Kohaku's kiss and his embrace spread throughout her body. When he brought his head up Rin found herself caught once more by his eyes.
"Your eyes are just as enchanting, Rin," Kohaku said with a smile.
"Kohaku…I don't care what Sesshomaru thinks of us. I belong to you Kohaku, I love you and I want to give myself to you." Kohaku nodded his head as he kissed Rin once more, she moaned as his lips and hands started to explore her body.
"Yikes…I better stop watching them now!" Kagome said quickly as she ran off. Kagome ran some distance before running into Sesshomaru and Kikyo. She looked at the two with wide eyes. "Uh…Hi Sesshomaru, hello Kikyo."
"Kagome, you are not with Inuyasha?" Kikyo asked as she raised an eyebrow. "Nevertheless where is Kohaku right now?"
"Yes, Rin as well. I've allowed her to leave for a short time to go pick flowers or do whatever it is girls her age do…She has not returned to me by the time curfew was over," Sesshomaru said.
"Now, both the children haven't met curfew, do you know where they might be?" Kagome stared at the two with bulging eyes and shook her head.
"No of course not, I have no idea where they are. I'm sure Kohaku's out slaying some demon!" Kagome said quickly. She let her thoughts roam in her head, "Yeah right…Unless that demon is Rin…" Kagome looked to Sesshomaru and smiled. "Rin, doesn't she always pick flowers? I'm sure she just got caught up in that one field she loves so much!" Kagome quickly ran off and left Sesshomaru and Kikyo staring at each other.
"She…wasn't in her favorite flower field," Sesshomaru said quietly.
"Kohaku doesn't make a habit of making himself noticeable by slaying demons all the time. He's already had his fair share of that today," Kikyo said as she raised her eyebrow.
Read and Review.