Disclaimer:

I don't own any of the Inuzukas. :(

But I do own the plot! 8D

-Phoenix

For Fuzzy


The Round and the Circles

„Can I have one?"

I nodded. With the unlit cigarette still between my lips, I fingered another one out of the small box swiftly, just to hand it to the girl whose name I had long forgotten. That was, if she had ever told me. I lit both of our cigarettes, then blew some smoke into the already thick and heated air of the small room.

"Just as they had said", the nameless girl said.

"Huh?" I wasn't up for talking. I might as well just get up and get dressed, but I wondered if I would get down the stairs, since I had reached a new peak of getting high on heroine last night.

"They said you were pretty good, Kiba."

I turned to look at her for a moment. Never noticed she had blond hair. Was relatively pretty. What a waste, another damn waste.

"You weren't", I said, just to avoid more talking, and we both took another puff. The truth was that I didn't really remember.

"Asshole."

"Whatever."

The music was still pounding downstairs, and to me it felt as if it was trying to smash my head against the rooftop... half past four in the morning. My cellphone went. By the time it stopped ringing, I had finished the cigarette. Sitting up, I started to get dressed, but it was kind of hard, since this damn floor was just melting away underneath me. Somehow, I made it into my pants and over to the small window, the only window this damned hole had, only containing a bed and a drawed. I opened the window widely and leaned on the frame, while the icy cold air started to surround me.

"Close the fucking window, lunatic", Nameless complained behind me, and I ignored her generously. "If I had known that you were this fu-"

"Would you just shut up?", I asked groaning. As if my headache asked for her blabbing on.

"Excuse me? I'm not the one having sex with a different person every fucking night."

Despite my – pretty true – reputation being spilled, I turned around and walked to the bed, where she still lay in all her smokey puposeless existance, to pick up my shirt and put it on.

"And I thought a Shinobi wouldn't sink this low… oh well", she snorted and started to search for something, as it seemed her underwear.

"You're probably not good at thinking, then", I said and gave a dumb laugh, then swayed over to the door while she was still in the process of dressing. We didn't say goodbye.

Once I had made it downstairs, my rediculously good nose had gotten loose of the smell of sex upstairs and now found things like alcohol, sweat, smoke, drugs and sick. If I hadn't be stoned and full, I had probably thrown up on the spot, but at least nobody tried to call me back or make me stay longer this time. It was one of my favorite clubs… but I needed … well, what did I need? Nearly every night I ended up like this. It had been the weekends since a year, but since October it had gotten ever more often, since I had started with the heroine. Plasters couldn't hide what I was doing to my armcrook anymore.

My mother had hit me for it, yelled at me, shaken me, had even thrown me down half the stairs once when I came home all high. She had tried to talk to me, had made Hana talk to me. Had tried to make me see several doctors. But I was sure, so sure that she didn't understand… it would solve itself.. somewhen.

When I came home, the house was dark. I was so tired, felt so sick, my clothes ranked from the club, and I couldn't decide between shower and bed. After climbing up the stairs slowly and carefully, in order not to overwork my head and body, I dragged myself to my bathroom, undressed and threw the clothes into the laundry basket, before taking the head of the shower. I turned on the coldest temperature possible and let the water run over my head, through my unruly brown hair, until I had enough.

As soon as I was in my room, I got into some shorts and fell into bed, barely hearing the yawn that Akamaru gave in the corner of the room because I had waken him up. I had nearly fallen asleep already when suddenly the door opened a little, and light from the hallway fell onto my face. I didn't open my eyes and pulled up the covers, groaning miserably while the intruder came walking up to me. I felt the matress give in slightly, and my mother pulled my covers away, looking down at me with a deep frown, her eyes so similar to mine – before I could really react, she had gripped my arm and pressed her finger into my armcrook harshly, making me shreak in pain.

"Was it nice today?", she hissed, and I jerked my arm free, staring at her like she was some kind of alien. If only the room would stop spinning…

"I.. uh.."

"Well, you forgot something, didn't you", my mother cut me off, and I could hear the anger vibrating in her voice even in my current state. Her head jerked around, and, following her gaze with mine slowly, my eyesight fell upon Akamaru's huge sleeping form. I gulped; my heart sank below my waistband. I hadn't even brought him home..?

"I.. I'm sorry…"

"Well sorry won't do, Kiba. Not every time. I can't hear it anymore." She gave me another disgusted gaze and got up, only to slam the door shut after she had walked out.

She was right. If anything, it was my obligation as a friend and master not to let poor Akamaru stand in the rain while I went out to get retarded. I was a bad friend, a bad son, a bad brother. If I even was any of those anymore. But I couldn't stop my current life even if I knew that I would have to…

I was sobbing like a child by now, and I crawled out of my bed and over to Akamaru, snugging to him like a blind that would cling to their stick. He lifted one of his huge paws lazyly, and I huddled into his 'embrace'. Rambling how sorry I was inbetween my rediculous sobbs, I could feel my Ninken's tongue lick my neck forgivingly.

But I couldn't forgive myself.