Cat, Rat, and Dog

By Matelia-legwll

Disclaimer: I really believe this should be old hat, but for you newbies, I am not JKR. Sorry to say, I didn't come up with the title on my own, and even the main premise of this piece is not my own. I was inspired by someone who attempted to do the same thing I will attempt. It is Through a Cat's Eyes by PoisonA. Thank you Batamut! Also, the rhyme is common enough knowledge. Oh, and by the way, I will not be JKR for the duration of this story. I hate putting disclaimers on every chapter, so I don't think I will. Don't sue me anyway.

Summary: JP/LE. What happened over Easter holidays in their fifth year? Only Lily, Peter, and Sirius know the whole truth.

Genre: Humor/Romance, JP/LE

Rating: K

A/N: This story I have placed during the Easter holidays in the Marauders' fifth year.


Why can't I get this spell? It should be simple, easy, a piece of cake, but I simply can't do it. What am I supposed to be doing? Transfiguring a piece of wood into a chipmunk, thanks for asking. Take a deep breath, Peter. Just because you have absolutely no one to vent to, doesn't mean you should start acting twitchy. Oh, great. I'm talking to myself. And yet the only thing I can concentrate on is that stupid rhyme James was saying in class just after his wood was Transfigured as perfectly as always. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

How much? This was driving me crazy. I'm a curious fellow by nature, but this little rhyme had me stumped. Usually I was too lazy to follow up on my curiosities, but this was much more interesting than chipmunks and blocks of wood. Well, it still was about wood, but the point remains.

I — am going — absolutely — mental!

First, I suppose I should say where I am or how everything started to happen. It all started with McGonagall's Transfiguration class. To start out the class she gave yet another lecture on our O.W.L.s and said to be sure to study hard for them over the Easter holidays. Then she gave us our blocks of wood that we should have been able to Transfigure easily enough. James, of course, was the first to do it followed closely by Sirius. Then James started to teach Sirius that little riddle. I think it has something to do with Muggles because Lily Evans turned around in her chair and glared at James.

Somehow James always manages to get on Evans's bad side. Anyway, this rhyme or riddle thing had me stumped the rest of the hour and I made absolutely no progress on my block of wood. Thankfully, that was our last class before the holidays, so I looked forward to collapsing on my bed to make up for the lack of sleep the night before.

James and Sirius had different ideas. They wouldn't let me sleep, and constantly took the mickey out of me for failing to complete my Transfiguration homework during class. Just because I'm an Animagus doesn't mean I am as perfect as those two at every Transfiguration. It was all I could do to finally become one, and, as they constantly remind me, it was only with their superior help that I even became an Animagus.

Remus was stuck in the hospital wing for the day, recovering from last night. Thankfully he didn't do as much damage to himself as in times past, so he should be out by tomorrow morning if Madam Pomfrey sees sense. So, as James and Sirius snuck down to the kitchens for their usual before-supper snack, I went to the library to try and do the transfiguration homework.

So that is where I am stuck now. Still trying to do the transfiguration, and still being totally distracted by the riddle. What does it mean? If a woodchuck could chuck wood? Does that mean that they don't chuck wood? Why would they be called woodchucks then? What is chucking wood, anyway?

"Pettigrew? What are you doing here alone? Where's Remus?"

The voice I dread came from behind me. How in the world had she snuck up on me? I swear she is a cat sometimes. Actually, that would probably explain my unreasoning fear of her.

"E-Evans?" I said, turning slightly to see the green eyes and red hair that filled James's dreams. I'm not exaggerating. He talks in his sleep.

Lily Evans was looking at me with a curiosity that would have to go unfulfilled. I would not betray my friends to her. But — her question was reasonable. Usually Remus did study with me when I came in here.

"Er — Remus is up in the dormitory," I blurted out. Thankfully it was a plausible answer. I absolutely hate it when she makes me blurt out an answer that is not even possible.

I turned back to my block of wood, only to hear her say something that made my blood freeze.

"Oh, good. I need to remind him about our patrols tonight."

I swiftly turned and saw her gathering up her things at a nearby table. "He has patrols tonight?" I asked, my anxiety showing through.

She paused and looked at me. "Of course. Professor McGonagall reminded me right after class."

"Professor McGonagall?" I squeaked. I mentally winced. If I didn't act enough like a rat already, I just have to squeak when I get nervous.

Evans regarded me curiously. Curiosity killed the Kneazle, I thought malevolently. "Why? Is something the matter?" she asked.

I was fuming inside. Surely Professor McGonagall remembered what last night was, and that Remus would be stuck in the hospital wing at least overnight, if not longer. I am proud to say that I didn't let any of my emotions travel over my face, unlike James; you can read his emotions completely through his eyes.

"He's just been feeling a little ill," I said. "I had hoped that McGonagall would have given him the night off to recover his strength."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," said Evans, sympathy oozing from her voice. "But it is just half an hour. Surely he can fulfill that much of his prefect duties." Her tone had morphed into something more businesslike and I regretted not saying that he was in the Hospital Wing in the first place.

She surely would have understood. Madam Pomfrey's need to see that everyone stayed under her care for as long as possible was legendary by now. One time in second year, she had kept Remus in there a full week. But how could I get out of this now? Evans was planning on going up to the dormitories and lecturing Remus on doing his prefect duties, as if he didn't do enough already.

What could I do? Before I had made my decision, Evans stalked out of the library and into the hall. If I had just been able to distract her, get her mind off of her duties, but the only one that was successful with that was James. He could always distract her, but not me. I was hardly worthy of notice. What could I do?

Everything is simpler when one is an animal. Ask any one of us. I looked around, making sure Madam Pince was nowhere around, and that no students were watching me. I quickly changed into my Animagus form. Wormtail was on the loose.

I had to find someone, and quickly. The first person to notice me crawling around was Snape. I glared at him with my little beady eyes, and scurried away before he got any ideas. I passed the Hospital Wing, before turning back and sneaking inside. Remus was asleep. Dead to the world and no help to me. Great. Back on my own.

I hastily made my way back to the Common Room. It was packed as usual, and I saw to my great relief that Evans had gotten delayed by some of her friends. I hurriedly went up the stairs to the dormitory and sat on my bed after transforming back. I had to make some kind of a plan. What could I do? If only Evans didn't have a cat's curiosity, or if she wasn't so dead set on her duties, I might be able to get away with a lie or two.

All too soon, I heard someone climbing the stair and opening the door cautiously. It was smart to open this particular door cautiously. There was no telling if one of us Marauders had played a prank on the next person to open the door. Evans found that out to her dismay in third year as her hair turned green from opening the door too hastily.

Evans peeked her head in, ready to withdraw it if needed, but stopped at the sight of me.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, exasperated. "And where's Remus?"

"Er—" I really hadn't thought through the conversation. I hadn't much time to think anyway and so I blurted out, "Remus is in the Hospital Wing."

I felt like banging my head against the wall. That was the one thing that I should never have said. If she went in there and saw Remus with his face scratched up, she would never leave us alone.

Her eyebrows raised. "Why?"

"I made him go. He was looking worse than he was this morning," I said hastily blurting out lies to cover myself. "I think he threw up when I was in the library."

"You think?" she questioned.

I felt my eyes widen. "Er — Remus never really admits when he is feeling sick, so we have to, er, guess about him a lot."

"And this getting sick has absolutely nothing to do with avoiding his prefect duties?" she asked.

"No. Nothing at all," I sighed in relief. Perhaps I would survive this yet.

Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "And it has nothing to do with you four sneaking out last night?"

I hate to admit this but she got me there. My silence was an admission of guilt in her eyes. I couldn't understand how she would have seen us, or known that we had snuck out last night. I had transformed up here in the dormitory, ridden on James's shoulder while the three of us were under the invisibility cloak. Remus had been escorted down to the tree by Madam Pomfrey, of course.

In my panic, I grabbed my wand and cast a spell on her. I don't know what spell that was, but she disappeared from my sight for the moment. I immediately dropped my wand in shock, and started hitting my head on the wall. If she hadn't known beforehand, she knew now.

A curious sound startled me from my reverie. I looked down at the floor near the foot of my bed to see a kitten, hissing and spitting at me.

A/N: What do you think so far? I have interesting plans for this story. My first ever chapter story which I'm putting up on Fan-fiction! Can you believe it? I hope you enjoyed this little preview and will keep with me as I post the rest of the story.