Well here's an extremely short, crack-fic one-shot. It suddenly came to me last night when I was laying in my bed, trying to fall asleep to the sound of 30 mph winds against my house. Not too soothing. Love it, hate it. Don't care.

Warning: mentions of sex (yoai) and minor swearing. Sakura bashing. I couldn't resist even though I like her character (at least in Shippuuden).

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.



A screech sounded as Sasuke shuddered and slowly turned to see the pink-haired girl cling onto his arm.

He sighed. He was on his way to Naruto's run-down apartment and this parasite decided to come and feast off of him.

"What do you want Sakura?" Sasuke said as he gritted his teeth, silently willing the pink thing away from his range of vision.

Sakura giggled. "I was just wondering. Your hair looks great today. How do you keep it like that? Do you use some kind of gel?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes at the stupidity of the question. "Why in the hell would I use gel? My hair has always been like this."

Blushing, Sakura added, "No. It looks different. Your spikes stand up even straighter. As a matter of fact, it's looked like this for about a month."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow in question. Is she a stalker or something? Who would notice such a thing? Then he smirked. "If you really would like to know, I'll tell you."

Sakura squealed and held his arm even tighter. "Oh tell me what you do with it. Maybe I can come over to your house and style it like that everyday!"

Sasuke mentally threw up as a demonic smile crosses his lips. "Only Naruto can style it like this."

Sakura froze in confusion for a second before bouncing back with, "I'm sure that I can do it better than he can!"

Sasuke chuckled, "Well, it depends on how good you are in bed.

Sakura's face turned beet red. "I don't understand what you're talking about Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke raised his free hand to point to his hair. "This... is sex hair. If you don't understand that Naruto is the only person I will allow to 'style' my hair for me, then you're even more idiotic than I thought."

Sakura's mouth gaped open, her mind comprehending what he just implied. She let go of his arm due to pure shock. "You mean to tell me that you're -gulp- sleeping with Naruto?"

Sasuke breathed a sigh of relief. She finally figured it out and maybe she will stop doing that stalking thing that she does. "You got it. Do you still want to know how he 'styles' my hair?"

Sakura started to back up slowly. "No. Not really."

Sasuke continued as if she never answered. "I pin him under me on the bed. He fists his hands in my hair, tugging on it as I pound into his tight ass. That's why my hair looks like this." He stopped to see that Sakura was passed out in the road probably due to her shock of the situation. "Tch... baka."

He started to walk to Naruto's house again, hoping that Naruto might be up for 'styling' his hair.


I don't know where the hell that came from, but I hope that you liked it. Please excuse any errors due to lack of beta because I don't want one. XD


BTW, who is keeping up with the manga? I am in love with the psychotic Itachi in chapter 386. I feel bad for Sasu-chan seeing as he's about to get his eyes ripped out!! WTF is up with that?! Kishimoto better be rooting for Sasuke. Grrrrrr...

Please review and I'll update my other stories. Thank you!