Disclaimer: I don't own House M.D. nor the characters.
Author's Note: Well, kids, I did it. This is chock full of fun! We've got some angst, we've got some fluffiness, we've got some hot, and we've got some flashbacks. And as I think about it, I should wait and post it on the fifth (the day Sarah was born), but then you'd all have to wait two more days. And no one wants that! So, enjoy!!
House entered Cuddy's office and shut the door behind him. He swiveled around to face Cuddy, mouth open as an insult prepared itself, but he stopped upon seeing the child. He brought his eyes back to Cuddy.
"What is she doing here?" House indicated the girl.
The child with his blue eyes stared at him. "You're mean."
"Am not," House whined in her direction.
She placed her hands on her hips just like her mother. "Are too."
House made a face. "Not."
"Too," she insisted.
"Children, please," Cuddy interrupted, her eyes on House. "Mommy's trying to work."
"Sorry, Mommy," piped up the young voice.
"Yeah, sorry, Mommy," House mimicked with a sneer.
"House, do you need something?" Cuddy placed a hand on her large stack of paperwork, hoping he received the hint that she was busy.
House limped across the office. "I guess I can't request anything inappropriate, so no."
"Then, leave." Cuddy gave him tight smile.
"No s-e-x?" House stopped in front of her desk.
"Sex?" the little girl looked up from her homework as she sat on the couch.
House's head snapped toward the couch. "What?"
"House!" Cuddy exclaimed, glaring.
House looked back at Cuddy. "Your daughter knows about sex?"
"No." Cuddy stood from her chair. "But, she's good at spelling."
"I didn't know sex was on the second grade spelling list," House replied.
Sarah had made her way over to her mother's desk and stared up, her dark hair falling over her shoulders. "Mom, what's sex mean?"
"Nothing," Cuddy told her daughter and then glared at House. "Some children know how to put letters together to form words, House."
"I can ask Ms. Ratchford what sex means," Sarah offered and looked up expectantly at Cuddy.
Cuddy shook her head. "No, don't do that."
House cleared his throat. "Sex is-"
"House," Cuddy warned.
"If you won't tell her, I will," House said.
Sarah turned her attention to House. "What's sex mean, Dr. House?"
"Sex is a word only adults can use," House told her.
"But, what does it mean?" Sarah asked.
"Only adults are allowed to know." He nodded.
Sarah scrunched her face. "Why?"
"Because that's what God says." He leaned down closer to her.
"You don't believe in God," Sarah replied.
House drew back slightly. "Who said that?"
"Mommy," Sarah answered.
House straightened and looked at Cuddy. "Why were you talking about me and God?"
Cuddy gave a shrug. "She asked."
House turned back to Sarah, eyebrows drawn. "You asked?"
"Why did God say that about s-" Sarah stopped. "I mean, the 's' word?"
"Because if you say it before you're an adult, you'll burn in Hell," House informed her, adding an element of menace to his voice.
"House!" Cuddy exclaimed.
"What?" House asked loudly, directing his gaze back to Cuddy.
"Mom, is that true?" Sarah asked her mother, unsure of House.
"N-" Cuddy paused. "Yes."
House smirked and looked at Sarah. "So don't ever say that word."
"I already said it!" Sarah exclaimed, a look of horror crossing over her face.
"It only counts after you learn about the rule," House was quick to reply.
Sarah stared at House not sure if she should believe him, a look he could have easily seen on the girl's mother. "Are you sure?"
"Completely," House answered with a nod.
"Sarah, there's Uncle James," Cuddy spoke up. "Why don't you go say hello?"
Sarah looked toward the office door and smiled at the sight of Wilson handing a set of charts over to a nurse.
"Okay!" Sarah ran out of the office.
"Nice one, House." Cuddy rolled her eyes and walked around her desk.
"Why am I always Dr. House and he gets to be Uncle James?" House asked, watching her movement.
"Because you lie to my daughter," Cuddy answered and headed toward the couch to look over Sarah's homework.
"So does he!" House exclaimed, throwing his arms out.
Cuddy turned to him and frowned. "Give me one-"
"Tooth fairy," House cut her off.
"That's childhood innocence, House," Cuddy replied. "It's not the same-"
"Fine," House stopped her from ranting. "I won't lie to her anymore."
Cuddy skimmed the math problems, checking her daughter's work and smiling slightly as she noted the answers were all correct. House was brooding, staring at Cuddy, but not actually seeing her. The office door opened and the little girl in the purple dress and white tights made her way back in.
Cuddy looked up and smiled. "Yes, Sarah?"
"Who is my dad?" Sarah lingered by the doorway and caught House's attention with her last word.
"Why?" Cuddy asked softly, slightly confused, and crossed the room.
Sarah let out a sigh that was almost frustrated. "Well, Uncle James was wearing a tie he said he got for Father's Day last year. And... do you think my dad wants a tie, too?"
Cuddy squatted to be closer to Sarah's level. "Honey, we talked about this."
"I know," Sarah whined. "But, we talked about Mother's Day and Father's Day in school and... doesn't he want to meet me?"
Cuddy couldn't bear seeing the pained expression on her daughter's face. "Sarah-"
"Actually, Mick..." House cocked his head to the side and moved towards the door. "Your dad does want to meet you."
Cuddy straightened. "House."
"You know him?" Sarah asked.
"I am him," he told her.
"House!" Cuddy hissed through gritted teeth, her hands clenched in tight fists.
"Huh?" Sarah stared up at House.
"I'm the daddy your- how did you put it?" House looked to Cuddy, but quickly directed his gaze back to Sarah after seeing the anger on Cuddy's face. "Oh, right, I'm the daddy your mommy picked from all the other daddies that wanted to give her a baby."
Sarah shook her head. "But, Mommy doesn't like you."
"She did at one point in time," he replied.
Sarah turned to Cuddy, eyebrows drawn and mouth hanging slightly open, "Mom, is that true?"
Cuddy placed a hand over her eyes and groaned as her other arm clutched around her stomach. House brightened considerably.
"You might want to answer-"
"Get out," Cuddy snapped to House.
"You told me not to-" House tried.
"Get. Out." Cuddy repeated sternly, still not removing her hand from her face.
House hesitated and bit his bottom lip for a moment before letting out a sigh. He maneuvered around Sarah and left. Sarah watched House limp away and then looked back at Cuddy, confusion etched across her face and wondering what she could do to comfort her mother.